New mom slams ex-fiance’s reaction to her baby name decision: ‘He forfeited any right to be involved’
A 23-year-old mother is frustrated after her ex-fiance began making demands about their children.
She asked Reddit’s “Am I the A******? (AITA)” forum for advice. Her fiance abandoned her when she was 14 weeks pregnant with twins. Then he fought to have as little custody as possible. But three weeks after she gave birth, he showed up asking questions and calling her names.
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“I recently had twins about seven weeks ago,” she explained. “I and their dad were engaged, planning on getting married, and did plan the pregnancy. He was the one who had really pushed the idea and convinced me, so when he decided to up and leave when I was about 14 weeks pregnant, it sucked. During my pregnancy, we had minimal contact, mainly around custody and the few requests for updates with the pregnancy.”
“Surprisingly, he did fight for custody — to have 0%. He’ll have visitation and parental rights but that’s it. The last time we talked before the babies were born was three days before my c-section. The babies were in the NICU for two weeks and during this time he didn’t text or visit. I also gave them my last name since I’ll be the one to do appointments, etc. and raise them. From his lack of interest throughout pregnancy, I didn’t think he cared.”
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Then weeks after the twins were born, the father showed up making demands.
“Three weeks after they were born and I’d taken them home, he rocks up,” she said. “He asks what I named them and when I tell him, he said they don’t look like their names and the names are ‘stuck up’ names. He then says their names and his last name, but I corrected him and told him they’d taken my surname. He got pissed and it became a tense situation. He demanded I change their names, I said no. He told me to combine our last names, I said no.”
“I told him a parent that fights for 0% custody of their kids doesn’t show much concern or care about said kids, especially since there are no physical/mental reasons to not be able to parent. He told me I was unreasonable and unhinged, I told him that paying child support was the bare minimum and if he wanted a say in their names, he should’ve shown up/called when they were born and not waited three weeks to even ask what their own kids’ names were.”
Redditors sided with the mother on this one.
“Once he decided he wasn’t going to be involved, he forfeited any right to [be] involved in any decisions regarding your children,” a user commented.
“If your kids are nearly a month old the first time you ask anything about their names, I don’t think your opinion matters at all,” someone wrote.
“He’s the crazy and unhinged one,” a person said.
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