Jenna Jameson Might Have Battered Someone

Today in celebrity news: Former XXX movie star Jenna Jameson was arrested this weekend, Halle Berry is unexpectedly with child, and Chris Brown might be dating. 

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Former adult film actress Jenna Jameson — meaning that she used to appear in "adult" films, not that she was once a grownup but somehow is not anymore — was arrested this weekend after allegedly attacking someone in her home. That someone was a Britney Markham, whose Twitter bio seems to suggest that she is or was at some point Jenna Jameson's assistant. The story is that Jameson battered her in the house and that Markham "made a citizen's arrest" while flagging down a police officer. Jameson was arrested Saturday night, but then on Sunday she took to her Twitter account to say that Markham "broke into my home and took everything." That tweet seems to have since been deleted. So who knows what the hell is going on. Mostly it's just surprising that something like this would happen to Jenna Jameson. And that this would happen in Newport Beach of all places! This just does not seem like the kind of thing that would happen in Southern California. Things like this never happen there. (Haha, jk, they happen all the time. Everyone is sun-mad, that's why.) Jameson was in some legal trouble last year after a DUI arrest, so things might not be going all that well for her these days. Guess we'll have to stay tuned to find out. [TMZ; CNN; The Inquisitr via Jezebel]

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Halle Berry is pregnant, we learned this weekend. And it turns out that, at 46, she was taken completely by surprise. "I thought I was kind of past the point where this could be a reality for me," she told CNN. "So it's been a big surprise and the most wonderful." So that's nice! I mean, 46 is on the older side for having a kid for sure, but people do it. I mean, how old was Saint Elizabeth when she gave birth to John the Baptist? Like a million? So Halle will be fine. Plus she's probably got the best doctors in the biz, so they'll take good care of her. Really what I want to know is what she's going to hame the kid. The father is Olivier Martinez, a known Frenchman, so will it be something Frenchy? Gauloises? Tuileries? Tony Parker? The options are endless. [CNN]

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Loved/reviled singer Chris Brown has been seen in the company of a beautiful young waitress recently, leaving some to wonder about the state of his relationship with Rihanna. Who really knows with these kids. They're together, they're not together, they're doing interviews, they're not doing interviews, they're in court, they're not in court. It's very hard to tell with today's modern kids. Used to be if you were dating, she'd wear your fraternity pin and you'd wear her Easter bonnet and you'd skip down the promenade yelling "We're a couple, everyone! We're a couple! Also, taffy for sale! Fresh taffy for sale!" But now? Who even knows. Everyone's subtweeting and subInstagramming and god knows what else. Is Chris Brown dating a waitress? Dating Rihanna? Dating neither? Both? There is literally no way of knowing. Makes me miss the good old days, when if a gal was with a fella, she'd coil around his neck like a boa constrictor and ring a bell over and over and over again so everyone would turn and see and acknowledge their coupledom. Simpler times. [Page Six]

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Hey look! Christoph Waltz has a daughter and she got married last month in Israel and now there is video footage of Waltz dancing the Hora and having a grand old time at the reception. That's nice, isn't it? He's always playing such a weirdo or creep in movies so to see him just having fun at a wedding is a change of pace. Granted, it's very blurry footage and you can barely see him, but still. Though, one question: Who's the jerk who took the video and then sold it (gave it? Would TMZ actually pay for this footage?) to a gossip website? Some wedding guest, huh. Get invited to a nice thing and then they go and sell them out. Though given that it's Waltz, it's possible he asked them to. His agent probably said, "I know you've won two Oscars now, but you still need to seem human." So maybe Waltz figured this would do the trick. If not, it's time to reevaluate one of his family members or friends. [TMZ]

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Uh oh. One Direction mop-topper Harry Styles got pantsed at a London concert on Saturday night. His bandmate Liam Payne walked up behind him and pulled his pants down (haha, oh dear), thus exposing Harry's underbits to the whole crowd. Of course there is video of this momentous occasion, if such a thing is of interest to you. My one question about this harmless prank is this: What are those weird strap things? Is that a part of British underwear? Am I seeing things incorrectly? Just not sure what those are. Confusing. Anyway. Let's stop talking about this. [Daily Mail]