When grief feels overwhelming, this yoga studio in St. John's offers a unique class
Kelsey Muise, left, and Michelle Lee, holding Lee's dog Lola. Muise is a yoga instructor and offers the class Yoga for Grief in Lee's yoga studio in St. John's Bodhi Hot Yoga. (Arlette Lazarenko/CBC)
Kelsey Muise has dealt with a lot of stress over the years.
For almost two decades as an RNC officer, she says, she carried on her shoulders the stress, trauma and grief from cases over the years. Compounding them was a sense of loss of identity when she quit.
The yoga mat was where she found a sense of peace.
"The time on the mat was able to give me the time that I needed for self-care and self connection," she said.
In January, Muise lost her emotional support dog, Sydney, and it was one of the hardest experiences she faced.
But from the pain sprang the idea to combine yoga and emotional support for people dealing with grief.
Michelle Lee, owner of St. John's studio Bodhi Hot Yoga, says she immediately loved the idea.
"We've been open for the past six years, and one thing I noticed about grief is that it gets stuck," Lee said.
"People get stuck in the memory, people get stuck in the emotion of it, and they start to lose themselves into a place of survival mode."
Lee says yoga offers a safe place.
"It helps you to move through the emotion. We don't have to understand it. We just want to release it."
In a two-hour class, run by Muise, people can expect to make gentle movements accompanied by a guided meditation and the sounds of crystal bowls.
Kelsey Muise and her dog, Sydney, who passed away in January. Muise said it was the loss of Sydney that catapulted the Yoga for Grief idea. (Facebook)
The goal, Muise says, is to bring awareness to emotions in the body, stay present with them and use the breath to let them go and find a new connection to the self.
But letting go doesn't mean forgetting.
"We're not asking you to forget the loved one … or moving on or getting over it," Muise said.
"We're just asking you to help move through the pain and suffering, to release that in an effort to find more connection and love.… It's just about finding peace for yourself."
Drowning in emotions
Muise says a person doesn't have to be on the yoga mat to experience relief. It's about finding anchor in the present moment.
"Just giving yourself permission to feel whatever it is that you feel," Muise said. "It's really important [to] not push it down because I think that's a lot of times what we do."
Lee says meditation is a powerful tool and there isn't a "right" way to do it.
"You have to realize your brain it thinks all day long," said Lee. "Thoughts are inevitable.… It's just about creating a little gap between the thought."
The goal is to lengthen the gaps between the thoughts.
"It's not about being in the the desired place instantly; it is about taking the time to ease off the gas, slow the momentum, come to the breath and just be aware that this too shall pass.
"It will pass."
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