In the gossip mags

Someone courier Kim Dotcom some mega-sized tissues, as Woman’s Day reveals his estranged wife Mona has a boyfriend. In a striking contrast to her multi-millionaire estranged husband, Mona’s new toy boy (and I do mean boy) is a 20-year-old ‘video game enthusiast’ from Waiuku.

The magazine has snaps of the pair leaving a gym workout, grabbing juice to go, running while holding hands and with Mona playfully biting her fella’s shoulder. They’re said to have met through their mutual passion for gaming, and to be honest they don’t look too surprised by the presence of the camera.

Woman’s Day, of course, was the mag to which Mona first sold her story after fleeing her husband’s vast Coatesville estate in the middle of the night via golf cart. Could the shots have been set up?

Jeriel Manapori is said to be living with Mona and her five kids – Kaylo, Keera, Kobi, Kimmo and Kylee - on the Dotcom estate, and often does the school run in an $80,000 Mercedes Mona bought him.

“She seems really happy with Jeriel,” blabs a friend of Mrs Dotcom. “They do everything together and are inseparable. It’s a big change for her to have so much fun in her life. [Ouch!] She trusts him with the kids and they adore him too.”

To the ‘Please Make This Couple Happen’ files! Woman’s Day reports Prince Harry has embarked on a series of secret dates with actress Emma Watson. The prince reportedly made his move after Emma parted ways from her previous boyfriend, rugby player Matthew Janney, before Christmas and invited the actress to a gathering at his place.

Could Prince Harry and actress Emma Watson be a couple? Photo: Getty

The mag seems to approve since Emma is university educated, already heavily aligned with charity work, has a high public profile and is, of course, gorgeous. Make this work please you two!

Woman’s Day announces ‘Kim’s Mission To Save Bruce’ and Mrs West looks like she’s embarking on a reconnaissance mission in unflattering camo pants and a most unsupportive crop top. Perhaps a mission to save her fashion sense? She looks like a droopy bosomed Rambo.

Kim’s boobies aside, the mag reports Kris Jenner, the woman renowned for her compassion, is apparently seeing red and trying to ban her daughters from seeing their father and stepfather, Bruce, after his involvement in a fatal car accident last week.

“The transgender revelations were bad enough as far as Kris is concerned – now a woman is dead and Bruce’s name is attached to it.”

Kim is apparently the sole Kardashian refusing to turn her back on Bruce and has read her mother and sisters the riot act about supporting him in his time of need. Both New Idea and the Day run photos from the crash site which show Bruce being tested for sobriety by California law enforcement. He passed, but rumours abound the Olympian was on his phone and/or smoking at the time of the accident.

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New Idea reports any sort of prison time for potential vehicular manslaughter charges could ‘spell and end to his long-held dream of becoming a woman.’

Oh please. As if they’d send an American celebrity to prison for an accident like that. Although a transgender former Olympian in the big house would make for an excellent reality show.

Investigators are looking in to whether a dose of female hormones found in Jenner’s system ‘could affect muscular coordination’ and, in turn, his driving.

Khloe Kardashian is reportedly looking to adopt. Photo: Getty

According to NW it’s brighter news afoot for Bruce’s stepdaughter Khloe Kardashian, who’s planning to a) adopt a baby boy and b) reunite with estranged husband Lamar Odom.

Khloe is said to have toyed with the idea of adopting a baby for years, with or without a man by her side, and has her heart set on a little boy she wants to name Robbie. Her hubby is reportedly 100 per cent behind the star’s decision.

“Whatever Khloe wants is [Lamar’s] new rule in life. He’s just happy she’s giving him another chance.”

New Idea reckons the Duchess of Cambridge is planning a home birth for the delivery of her second child, and the queen is said to be aghast. This, thought, is news from Kate’s oldest very bestest school friend Jessica Hay, whom the palace has publicly said she hasn’t spoken to for years.

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Kate is said to be tired, hormonal and wary of the media circus the birth of Prince George created for all the staff and patients at St Mary’s hospital when he was born in 2013. And hey, the family has plenty of minions, er, staff, to deal with cleaning up the carnage after a delivery.

Will Duchess Kate have a home birth? Photo: Getty

“Most members of the royal family are thinking that a relaxed and happy home birth is the way forward. They’d rather go back to the tradition of the news of the royal birth being posted on an easel outside Buckingham Palace – it’s more fun than Twitter!”

Jessica Simpson apparently got violent on a recent date night with hubby Eric Johnson when she found her beloved chatting to a pretty brunette at a Hollywood restaurant. Eric later left the joint with a cut on his nose, ‘which an insider believes came courtesy of Jessica’s designer bag walloping him across the face.’

Jennifer Aniston’s eyes may be smiling at you from the front of New Idea, but the mag will have you believe the actress is all sad face inside. ‘Emotional Jen: I’ve Lost So Much’ sobs the headline, and the article within reveals an in depth interview with The Hollywood Reporter in which the actress shares her tales of woe.

“I’ve cried deeply,” she confesses to the publication. I’d believe it. She looks like a sobber.

Hoorah for the celebrity nannies telling all in New Idea! Britney Spears reportedly saves half eaten burgers and fries under her bed for a midnight snack. Christina Aguilera walks around starkers in front of staff. Brad Pitt refuses to shower and the Pitt-Jolie house is covered in dirty laundry, while Kim Kardashian tells everyone within earshot her daughter North is much cuter than Beyonce’s first born, Blue Ivy.

“Beyonce doesn’t have to do any of the dirty work and can just be loving and doting,” blabs an insider. “But it seems easy when you have six nannies!”

One thing Kim and Beyonce stand united on, though, is their determination to keep that fox Rihanna away from their respective husbands.

Kim and Beyonce apparently want to keep their men away from Rihanna. Photo: Getty

Apparently there have been ‘all night texting sessions’ and ‘flirtatious glances in the studio’ between RiRi and Kanye, and there have long been rumours of a dalliance between she and her musical mentor, Jay-Z.

Matters weren’t helped when Rihanna completely dissed Kim at the Superbowl recently. “It was embarrassing because it was just so rude,” reports an onlooker. “Poor Kim was mortified because a lot of people saw it go down. Ri really looks down on her and treats her like a piece of trash...[Kim’s] convinced Rihanna gets a sick pleasure out of seducing other people’s husbands.”

Woman’s Day runs photos of Nicole Kidman all over British actor Damian Lewis at a recent film premiere in Berlin. I don’t see the mystery. I read the number of redheads around the world is on the decline, so gingers have to stick together.

Johnny Depp and Amber Heard’s wedding pictures from Johnny’s Caribbean island are so blurry they’re almost indistinguishable in Woman’s Day. The newlyweds will honeymoon in Australia, where Depp is soon set to start work on Pirates of the Caribbean: I’m Doing It For The Paycheque.

Who likes to feel nauseated on a Monday? Was that a yes? Then take some time to consider the love life of Jennifer Lopez and recently reconnected toyboy Casper Smart. “Jen says Casper is the ultimate friend with benefits. She has needs and Casper fulfils them.”

Gross.

And that’s all from the mags this week!