Gary Brown: Guys need 'guys' to get through life

In order to live life to its fullest, guys need guys. Trained guys. Trained gals will work, too.

We often won't admit it, but we guys can't do everything. If any guy asks, you didn't hear that from me.

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A guy who is an electrician, for example, might not be able to do plumbing work. Electricity and water generally don't mix. There usually are sparks. An electrical guy needs a trained plumber guy for anything that will leak to lower floors or cause a fire if he tries to save time and space by running it all through the same pipe.

A guy who paints houses might not be able to build a shelf inside the home without the books falling to the floor.

A guy who lays floor tile could very well get stuck – literally – behind the colorful pattern if he tries to put up wallpaper.

A guy who tends a productive garden might cut off the limb he is sitting on if he tries to take down a tree that is providing his vegetables with too much shade.

I know there are guys who right now are scoffing. "We'll manage," they'll say before they ascend a ladder to paint the upper part of the house. Trust me. They'll be screaming a different tune on the way down.

Let me put it this way. If the normal guy – let's hypothetically say Gilligan, for example – was stranded on a deserted island and had to live there for a while, so he had to build a house, he'd better hope that guys who had carpentry skills, knowledge in electrical work, and plumbing experience all were taking the same three-hour cruise.

It would have helped if the professor was traveling with a guy who had an education in long-distance communication, and Mary Ann was a chef.

The right guys do a job correctly

So, unless we all are like my dad, a guy who had a lot of blue-collar skills and could be his own guy much of the time, we guys need other guys.

Roofing guys won't fall off when they're putting on new shingles.

A trained electrician guy will be able to fix the wiring in a home without being thrown back or yelling "Yeow!"

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A guy who is experienced in foundation work doesn't let his first floor fall into the basement.

Most guys that a guy could hire to repave his driveway won't leave the surface cracking and crumbling – a place where potholes come to grow the minute their trucks pull away.

If you get a guy to install a window, the chances are good he won't fall through it or drop the whole thing down on the patio.

I don't want to get all icky about it, but if a guy has bugs in his house, he should know that a pest pro likely will be able to remove them, not just move them around the rooms.

And, the mold removal guy won't be hacking and coughing when the unhealthy stuff is gone.

Don't ask me how I know any of this.

Life is a matter of gathering guys

The more I age, the more guys and gals I get. Right now, I have a bunch of them.

I have more than a handful of doctors – eye, ear, nose, throat and other organ guys and gals – who check every part of my elderly body, even where I didn't know I had parts.

My money guy and gal make plans for me to be on track to have my funds last longer than my life.

And my tax preparation guy ensures that the government gets its share without me accidentally going to jail.

I used to have a hair guy, and later a hair gal, but that was back when I had a need for them. Time sort of phased out both them and what used to be growing on my head.

Still, in their absence, I've brought in a bunch of other guys. I'm thinking of adding lawn-mowing and snow shoveling guys this year.

A guy can't have too many guys to help him get through life without back problems.

Reach Gary at gary.brown.rep@gmail.com. On Twitter: @gbrownREP.

This article originally appeared on The Alliance Review: Gary Brown says a guy's 'guys' are key to getting through life