The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week
Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. So each week, we round up the most hilarious 140-character quips from moms and dads to spread the joy. Scroll down to read the latest batch and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more!
Me: OMG, will these kids just leave me alone?
Also me: *weeps at a commercial where kid leaves for college.— MyMomologue (@MyMomologue) November 8, 2017
It's amazing how much of parenthood is spent eating delicious things in secret.
— Tiffany Hunter (@lifeattiffanys) November 4, 2017
Let’s get married and have kids so instead of happy hour you can explain inversely proportional graphs while I clean up this slime disaster.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) November 6, 2017
My 4yo just asked me if I was there when we went to Disney 6 weeks ago for 5 days, so I’m obviously making a huge impact in her life.
— SpacedMom (@copymama) November 7, 2017
Pretending I'm not about to have a mental breakdown when my kids "help" me cook is the hardest thing I've had to do as a mom.
— Mommy Owl (@Lhlodder) November 7, 2017
Friend: What's it like to have kids?
Me: [sings Wheels on the Bus on repeat, replacing all the words with "butt"]— Ramblin' Mama (@ramblinma) November 6, 2017
You know you're truly a parent when you are required to show the pictures in the book you are reading to the stuffed animals in the room.
— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) November 7, 2017
Hi hello how’s your Saturday morning okay I’ll go first: we made it halfway to school before my kid asked why he had to go an extra day.
— AsKateWouldHaveIt (@KateWouldHaveIt) November 4, 2017
The longest song in the world is the Happy Birthday song to a toddler who is ready to help blow out some candles.
— The ParentNormal (@ParentNormal) November 6, 2017
Shout out to school music teachers everywhere who made a choice in life to get trapped in a room with 25 kids learning to play the recorder.
— Danielle and Farrah (@effinghandbook) November 6, 2017
The hardest part of having multiple kids is explaining why only your first child has a baby book.
— MyQuestionableLife (@2questionable) November 9, 2017
I call my sons' bathroom "the hotel" because after they use a towel once, they just throw it on the floor.
— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) November 7, 2017
My son is having a hard time getting over the fact we’re not naming his new baby sister Megatron.
— Unfiltered Mama (@UnfilteredMama) November 6, 2017
Buy your kids a room full of toys so they can play with 3 Legos, a kazoo party favor, a marker & 1,400 pieces of ripped construction paper.
— Walking For 140 (@WalkingOutside) November 6, 2017
Welcome to parenthood.
Earplugs, get some cause it’s loud af.— MotherPlaylist (@MotherPlaylist) November 8, 2017
My kids ask me what's for dinner as if I have any clue.
— Jennifer Lizza (@outsmartedmommy) November 7, 2017
In case you were wondering, it takes approximately 8,000 hours for six 5-7 year olds to bowl an entire game.
— here comes the son (@idtweetforever) November 7, 2017
“Tonight we get an extra hour of sleep.”
Parents: pic.twitter.com/DXTmBix2iU— MommieKnowsfresh (@MommieKnwsFresh) November 5, 2017
Son said he really wants to see “murder on the polar express,” and shit now so do I.
— John Ross Bowie (@JohnRossBowie) November 6, 2017
At what point should you worry about your drinking?
I bet it's before your kid builds a Lego brewery.— Northern Lights 🦖 (@PinkCamoTO) November 6, 2017
We have the tooth fairy, Easter Bunny, and Santa, but no one thought up a fictional character to keep kids in bed during time changes?
— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) November 5, 2017
Overheard my 4 y.o. talking to my mother-in-law - "and mommy was the last to wake up and she woke up naked."
— Julie Burton (@ksujulie) November 7, 2017
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This article originally appeared on HuffPost.