Make fun of outdated sexual scorekeeping with the first base meme
If you've lived through the hell of public middle school, you're probably familiar with the markers for sexual experiences: first base, second base, third base, and home run.
The inexplicable baseball-themed terms are pretty dated — it's 2018, and we're still defining relationships by "how far" they've physically gone?
A meme poking fun at tired sexual expectations has been making its rounds on Twitter, pointing out that relationships involve way more than just sex.
first base: sex
second base: day drunk shopping
third base: saving the bees
home run: discussing the political circumstances of the freedom of bobby shmurda— Chris Liner (@Lizard_Wizard69) July 23, 2018
The first base meme jokes that younger people are more open to sexual experiences — thanks to accessible birth control and comprehensive sex ed — but the realest challenge for the newer generation is vulnerability and genuine romantic interest.
1st base: sex
2nd base: hitting each other up when the sun is out
3rd base: sharing childhood trauma
home run: verbally expressing romantic interest— w (@suuuuuunshine) July 16, 2018
Most variations of the meme were sweet: when casual sex is widely accepted in progressive societies, people can actually spend time getting to know each other after.
first base: sex
second base: sharing music
third base: sharing ugly childhood photos
fourth base: hanging out during the day time— ѕαм ◡̈ (@sxmmie) July 19, 2018
First base: sex
Second base: actually hanging out again
Third base: seeing me cry
Fourth base: unconditional love & support— hispanic pixie dream girl ✨ (@xhastalamuerte) July 17, 2018
first base: sex
second base: good morning texts
third base: singing in the car together
homerun: meeting their family— JSTJosh (@JoshJST) July 23, 2018
first base: sex
second base: forehead kisses
third base: making you playlists
homerun: caring about your mental health— *.°❁ (@princesslysi) July 21, 2018
Other versions of the meme were more pessimistic about romance.
first base: watching their instagram stories and replying 👀
second base:
third base:
home run:— jaboukie young-white (@jaboukie) July 22, 2018
Why is this so relatable?
first base: actually texting back
second base: sending pics of my dogs
third base: sending demos that are vaguely about the person
home run: meeting up in a neutral location once & being awkward the whole time— saltlick (@saltlickoh) July 18, 2018
First base: sex
Second base: me getting too attached and smothering you
Third base: you break up with me— Rock Lee (@scwhorepio) July 22, 2018
First Base: Having sex
Second Base: Making eye contact
Third Base: Falling in love with the person and deleting Tinder
Home Run: Starting an open relationship and downloading Tinder again— Luqmaan Khan (@luqmaank99) July 20, 2018
Some Twitter users had more absurd romantic expectations.
first base: sex
second base: talking about anime
third base: watching anime together
home run: watching 700+ episodes of naruto together— 𝖆𝖘𝖍𝖑𝖊𝖊 ⓥ (@ashleesummerr) July 20, 2018
first base: sex
second base: sharing recipes
third base: going to the grocery store
fourth base: erotic lasagna role play— 𝕐𝕆𝕃𝕆 𝕎𝕀ℤ𝔸ℝ𝔻 (@yolowizard420) July 22, 2018
First base: talking about Sartre.
Second base: talking about Heidegger.
Third base: talking about Hegel.
Home run: admitting you've only read the Wikipedia pages.— Existential Comics (@existentialcoms) July 21, 2018
first base: your swamp gets overrun with fairytale creatures
second base: rescue a princess from a tower
third base: deliver her to lord farquaad to clear out the swamp
home run: crash the wedding with a dragon and turn her into an ogre— buck mcneely (@macleanlandis) July 20, 2018
And let's be real, would it even be a good Twitter meme if there wasn't a "Mr. Brightside" reference thrown in?
first base: falling asleep
second base: calling a cab
third base: having a smoke
home run: taking a drag— E L I J A H M A N N (@ButCallMeEli) July 18, 2018
There are still 205 days until Valentine's Day, so don't worry: You still have time to find someone to watch 700 episodes of Naruto with.
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