A Few Questions About Taylor Swift's Edible Birthday Gift For Selena Gomez
Taylor Swift had one hell of a weekend: she performed a few rain-soaked shows in the New York City area, was prolific on Insta Stories, and celebrated her long-time BFF Selena Gomez's birthday.
That's all well and good, except by "celebrated her long-time BFF Selena Gomez's birthday," I mean "baked a cake for Selena, who was on the opposite side of the country."
Yes, Selena, who is now 26, spent the day before (and presumably the day of) her Sunday birthday in California, yachting around with fellow hot people and generally having a nice time not being in New York/New Jersey.
And yet:
It begs the question: why? Why did Taylor bake this cake for Selena if Selena was not going to be able to eat it? To be fair, she captioned the photo of the cake "Will I let distance stop me from celebrating my best friend's bday," so she's aware Selena is not nearby, but ... some follow-up questions:
Did Taylor overnight this cake to Selena's boat?
What did she do with the cake if she did not, in fact, overnight the cake to Selena's boat?
What does it mean to "Gomez or go home?"
What flavor is this cake?
Why is Taylor's frosting handwriting so immaculate? Whose frosting handwriting is that immaculate? That's insane?
The "I MEAN I COULD BUT WHY WOULD I WANT 2" bit - is that in reference to not letting distance stop her from celebrating Selena's birthday? Or is it in reference to the "Gomez or go home thing," which I'd still love some clarification on, BTW.
If Taylor did not overnight this cake, did she eat it all by herself?
Does there now exist, somewhere in this world, a video of Taylor Swift crushing an entire pink-frosted cake?
Will the world truly ever know the answers to these questions?
Does any of it matter at all?
Let me know.
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