Family and friends celebrate the life of former Boulder County Clerk Clela Rorex, who issued first same-sex marriage license

Jul. 23—Clela Rorex went into one of her first meetings with the Boulder County Commissioners after being elected Boulder County clerk in 1975 with two things: a large budget request and a pack of smokes.

Telling the story decades later, Rorex's friend Mardi Moore noted that Rorex had smoked only once in her life before that — in a car — and it didn't go so well.

"She got sick and had to pull over," Moore said.

But facing a room full of men and cigarette smoke while asking for more money for her department, Rorex confidently pulled out a cigarette and put it in her mouth.

"She lit it ... and it was the wrong end," Moore said. "She got the budget passed, but she never smoked again."

A young feminist who wasn't even endorsed by her own party, Rorex was nothing like those who came before her. It was only a few weeks later that Rorex had the courage to do what nobody who came before her had done, and in doing so changed the course of history.

On Saturday, family, friends, admirers and allies gathered to remember Rorex, who made history in 1975 when she became the first government official to issue a same-sex marriage license.

Rorex, 78, died at a hospice care facility in Longmont on June 19 of complications after a recent surgery.

On what would have been her 79th birthday, the trailblazer was honored at a celebration of life at the Boulder Jewish Community Center in Boulder.

"She was always caring about the next person," said Moore, the executive director of Out Boulder County.

On March 26, 1975, two men from Colorado Springs walked into the Boulder County Clerk's Office requesting a marriage license. Rorex reached out to then-Assistant District Attorney Bill Wise seeking clarification about any laws or codes that would prohibit the issuance. Wise told her nothing prohibited from her from issuing the license, and the decision was up to her.

"I calculatedly made that decision to say yes," Rorex said in a recording played at the memorial. "I wanted things to keep going forward."

Rorex issued a total of six same-sex marriage licenses before the Colorado attorney general ordered her to stop, and all of those licenses remain valid to this day.

Moore read a blog post by a man who was a teen in Alabama when he saw a story in the newspaper about what Rorex had done.

"Clela was the very first person who gave me hope I could live the life I wanted," the man wrote.

Moore added, "I'm so grateful to have known this hero ... Clela, you gave me and millions like me hope."

The decision came at great personal cost to Rorex, who endured calls and threats, and resigned amid a recall movement less than three years later, never to take public office again.

It wasn't until years later that Rorex got her proper recognition as a pioneer and an ally to LGBTQ people at a time when support from those outside that community was scarce.

But Rorex's son, Scott Poston, said Rorex didn't make the decision because she envisioned herself a hero. It was simply the right thing to do.

But while Poston acknowledged Rorex's role in history, he also took time Saturday to remember her as a person and a mother.

"She was a feminist and an activist, and at the same time she was a mom who did a great job of fitting that in," Poston said.

Poston said he remembers as a child going to a garden party for some political mover or shaker. But as a reward for sitting on the lawn through the adult stuff, later that day his mother took him to the movies to see "Jaws 2," even though she wasn't a horror movie fan.

"She was a great mother, and I miss her a lot," Poston said.

While she never took office again, Rorex continued her activism and remained politically active throughout her life.

"She was always fighting the next battle," Poston said.

Colorado Gov. Jared Polis and U.S. Rep. Joe Neguse issued recorded statements for the service, while Boulder Mayor Aaron Brockett and Boulder County Commissioner Claire Levy read proclamations on what is now Clela Rorex Day.

"Clela Rorex will live on forever," Brockett said.

During the memorial, Donnie Herrington recalled meeting Rorex after being married to his husband, Justin Jones, in 2014 at the Boulder County Courthouse by then-Clerk Hillary Hall, in her own way a spiritual successor to Rorex.

"We were instantly star-struck," Herrington said. "Everyone was so enamored by the stories she would tell."

The couple struck up a friendship with Rorex, inducting her into their knitting group. They celebrated with her when the U.S. Supreme Court's ruling in 2015 concluded a 40-year battle that was in some ways started by a 31-year-old in Boulder County.

"It was the final ending to that story," Jones said. "It's kind of an impossible dream."