Exclusive: Brittany Maynard’s mother on her life, last days and legacy

By Steven Shapiro

“She said, ‘I’m ready. I’m already only living for others, this is a fact, Mom. I’m only living for other people now. Let me go.’”

In an exclusive interview with Yahoo Global News Anchor Katie Couric, Deborah Ziegler, author of the new book “Wild and Precious Life,” recounts her personal and profound journey after learning her only child, 29-year-old Brittany Maynard, was diagnosed with terminal brain cancer.

“I just thought, I just want to go with her,” Ziegler says.

On New Years Eve 2013, Brittany was rushed to the hospital with a debilitating headache. A CT scan showed a large shadow on her brain.

Ziegler writes that when she approached Brittany in the hospital, her daughter’s first words were numbing. “I’m sorry, Momma,” she said. “I’m not going to be able to take care of you the way you’re taking care of grandpa, I’m not going to live that long.”

Brittany had her whole future in front of her. She was a Berkeley graduate and had married her husband, Dan Diaz, just a year earlier.

Following her terminal diagnosis and a surgery that removed less than half of her rapidly growing tumor, Brittany made a decision that would catapult her to the forefront of the death with dignity debate. She chose to move from her home state of California to Oregon where physician-assisted death for terminally ill patients is legal. At the time, it was against the law in California.

She chose Nov. 1, 2014, as her final day.

“She woke up and said, ‘Let’s go for a walk,” Ziegler said. “It was just a beautiful day and I couldn’t help myself. I asked, ‘Are you sure today is the day?’ A mom always has to do that. And she said, ‘Yeah, Mom, today is the day.”

Asked by Couric if the ability to take a walk in the woods indicated it might not be Maynard’s time, Ziegler offered a sobering response.

“When you’re talking about a terminally ill patient, you have to realize that each death takes its own journey. Brittany was having some very difficult symptoms.”

She had terrible neck pain. The seizures were terrifying. They were coming closer together. They were more severe. Each seizure was worse than the one before.Sometimes she would just talk gibberish when she came out of the seizure, and we would wonder, ‘Oh my gosh, is she going be able to speak again?’”

Ziegler says her daughter returned home to her bedroom, where she was joined by family in what she described as the “circle of love.”

She took her medicine and her last breath as Ziegler read her favorite poem, “The Summer Day,” by Mary Oliver.

Ziegler has become an advocate for the death with dignity movement.

“She said, ‘Mom, instead of grandkids, this is what I’m giving you. I can’t give you grandbabies, but I can give you this, to champion the cause of the terminally ill,” Ziegler says.

Ziegler found an ally in Christy O’Donnell, a terminally ill single mother from California, who was also fighting to die on her own terms.

Related: California Mom Christy O’Donnell Fights to Die on Her Own Terms

On Oct. 5, 2015, a day Ziegler describes as bittersweet, Gov. Jerry Brown signed the End of Life Option Act for California,.

“The law was there and many people were jubilant and happy, including me. But that didn’t bring my daughter back, and so there was that feeling of loss magnified in a way.”

O’Donnell died four months before the law went into effect.

A year after her daughter’s death, Ziegler told Couric she honored a request her daughter made months earlier for her to visit Machu Picchu in Peru.

“I felt her presence,” Ziegler said. “It felt like cleansing. Like washing away everything that was inside of me that was angry and anxious and sad — it was washed away. And I felt like “I’m going to honor my child in the biggest way possible. I’m going live a bigger life because of her. I’m going live a larger life. I’m going be a better person. I’m going to honor her with the rest of my life.”

In the days preceding publication of Ziegler’s book, Brittany Maynard’s widower, Dan Diaz, who did not participate in the writing of the book, posted a statement on Facebook, which reads, in part: “The book that her mother, Deborah Ziegler, decided to write against Brittany’s instructions, Wild and Precious Life, does not appropriately tell the story of Brittany Maynard.” Diaz, who along with Ziegler, has helped champion the right to die movement, went on to say, “The purpose of this post is simply to convey Brittany’s instructions; it is not to create angst or division. Kindness and Love are what we need more of in this world.”

When reached for comment by Yahoo, Diaz said that Maynard’s wishes are what’s important and readers of the post can judge that for themselves.

Atria/Emily Bestler Books, a division of Simon & Schuster, which published “Wild and Precious Life,” issued a response to Diaz’s statement that read in part, “The book is about a mother/daughter relationship and is a work of love and truth. It is a lifeline to anyone facing a tough time. Deb’s story demonstrates that vulnerability is terrifying. However, in “Wild and Precious Life” Brittany leads her mother and the reader to see that vulnerability is also a powerful way to live. It is worth it to be our true selves. It is worth it to stand up and tell our stories. It is worth it to live eyes and hearts wide open all the way to the end.”

Deborah Ziegler added:

“Wild and Precious Life” is a tribute to Brittany’s life both before and after the brain tumor and it is in keeping with my promise to my only child to keep her legacy alive. ‘Death is not a fairy tale, Momma. Why does everyone want to make it out to be one?’”