David Bowie’s Quote About Kids Perfectly Captures Fatherhood

Obviously legendary artist David Bowie had a way with words. But in the wake of his tragic death on Monday at the age of 69, the singer’s musings on fatherhood have struck a chord, catching fire online and reminding all of us about the truly transformative power of family.

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“I don’t have that sense of loneliness I had before, which was very strong,” the Rock and Roll Hall of Famer said in a 2007 interview, later shared by the Telegraph and currently circulating again online as fans reminisce about the performer. “I’m very at ease, and I like it. I never thought I would be such a family–oriented guy. I didn’t think that was part of my make-up. But somebody said that as you get older you become the person you always should have been, and I feel that’s happening to me. I’m rather surprised at who I am, because I’m actually like my dad.“

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Indeed, well before Bowie’s death, the former wild child made family — Iman, his second wife, of 24 years, and his two kids, Alexandria “Lexi” Zahra Jones, 15, and Duncan Jones, 44 (above) — his focus. And when he passed “peacefully … after a courageous 18 month battle with cancer,” according to a statement posted to Bowie’s Facebook page, he was “surrounded by his family.”

Sharing a sweet childhood photo of himself on his dad’s shoulders, Bowie’s son Duncan tweeted the same day, “Very sorry and sad to say it’s true. I’ll be offline for a while. Love to all.”

The father, Duncan has said, provided “an incredible childhood. We travelled all over the world and we got to do some amazing things.” Looking back on how he was a fixture backstage at concerts and got to work with Dad, the director revealed, “I treasure those memories.”

Bowie with ex Angie and Duncan. (Photo: Retna)

When Bowie was filming, he brought along young Duncan — of whom he got custody in 1980 following his split from first wife Angie. “I hung out with Dad when he was doing Labyrinth,” the son said, adding that his favorite moments, though, were watching movies with his father when they lived in Switzerland. “Dad really enjoyed introducing me to new things in literature, music and films,” he recalls. “I was about seven and we’d watch these big adventure movies like The Sea Hawk, a pirate movie with Errol Flynn, or James Cagney movies on video. I absolutely loved those films. Dad introduced me to Fritz Lang’s Metropolis and the original Baron Munchausen. He’d say, “You’ll love this! It’s amazing – you haven’t seen anything like this before.”

Bowie also introduced him to making movies, which became Duncan’s calling. “He taught me, in a lovely way, the basics of making a movie, like how to do storyboards, write a script, do the lighting … I’d make these little sets and I’d set up backstage with my Star Wars and Smurfs toys. While Dad would go on stage I’d be making my little movies.”

As an adult the father-and-son duo remained close, often Skyping between Duncan’s home in Los Angeles and Bowie’s in New York City, where the rocker was then a hands-on father to teen daughter Lexi, often helping her with homework. “He’s just a wonderful guy and father,” Duncan said in the 2011 interview. “He gave me the time and the support to find my feet and the confidence to do what I do.”

But it was Bowie’s daughter Lexi who truly transformed the singer into a doting dad. “Since the birth of my daughter I tend to write aggressively from a more optimistic standpoint, even if the subject matter is kind of dark,” he said in 2003. “I really don’t want to cast a dark shadow over her future, subtly or psychologically. It really behooves me to kind of be more positive about things than I might have been before she was born."

Daughters, it’s been said, can change a father like no other. “Science has shown that parenting can actually rewire the brain due to the strong attachment process and emotional ties that come with having a child,” Bethany Marshall, PhD, a Beverly Hills-based psychotherapist, has told Yahoo Parenting. “When a man connects with his daughter, the relationship can be intensified because the differing gender dynamic pushes him outside his comfort zone. … The experience can cause him to form a new sense of empathy for women.”

Not to mention a new perspective on his life. “Age doesn’t bother me, it’s the lack of years left that weighs far heavier on me,” Bowie had admitted. “It’s having to let go of it all, even more so now. It’s so much more poignant. … There’s such a cloud of melancholia about knowing I’m going to have to leave my daughter on her own.”

Yet by all accounts, Bowie made the most of the time that they had together. “He walked Lexi to school every day — something he had missed with Duncan,” Bowie’s biographer Paul Trynka has said, adding, “which was something he deeply regretted.”

(Top photo: Retna)

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