Candlelight vigil; Supporters gather for Nex Benedict vigil at Episcopal Church

Feb. 26—Mother Janie Koch of All Saints Episcopal Church says she wants all of the members of the community to feel safe.

Koch spoke prior to a candlelight vigil for Nex Benedict attended by approximately 50 individuals at All Saints Episcopal Church in McAlester.

She said the idea to hold the Friday night candlelight vigil came about spontaneously.

"We started talking and sharing our shock and grief and our anger," Koch said of Benedict's death. "What about those of us who are left behind? They need to feel they are safe."

Benedict was a 10th-grade student at Owasso High School who died Feb. 8, the day after a reported altercation with other students in a school restroom.

Benedict identified as a nonbinary student and preferred to be called by the pronoun they or them, according to family.

A medical determination of the precise cause of death was pending further tests from the state medical examiner's office, according to a statement from the Owasso Police Department, which said a preliminary autopsy report showed Benedict did not die as a result of blunt force trauma. Toxicology and other test results are pending.

Owasso police said the investigation is ongoing.

Richard Askew and Karen Askew, who consider All Saints Episcopalian Church their home church, participated in the candlelight vigil to show their support for Nex Benedict and other members of the community.

"I think there's a need of support for the LGBTQ+ community," Richard Askew said. "At times, when you see hate rearing its ugly head, you've just got to do it."

Mother Koch opened the vigil by addressing members of the LGBTQ+ community in attendance.

"This is a space where you are welcome," Koch said. "You are welcome just as you are.

"For many of you sitting here, it takes a significant amount of courage to even step into the space of a church because of your own experience" Koch said.

"I want to honor you as you stepped forward in courage, not knowing what this would be like," she said.

Koch asked those assembled to repeat Benedict's name several times, which they did, saying "Nex, Nex, Nex."

"They were a lovely creation of the divine," Koch said of Benedict. "Now, they're gone.

"You know the history. You know the story. You know the stumbling blocks in your path," Koch said.

"I'm not going to spin it and say there's a light at the end of the tunnel; it's darkest before the dawn. "Koch said. "I'm not going to fill you with platitudes."

She said the candlelight vigil came about after Max Blancett of the Rainbow Connection in McAlester reached out to her and asked her if the church was going to offer a vigil.

"The light was so big and bright. We want to remember Nex that way."

As the ceremony closed, Koch made a collection plate available. She told those who wanted give that the proceeds would be sent to Benedict's family.

Prior to the beginning of the service Richard Askew related how Jesus said "Love your neighbor as yourself."

"If you can't do that, we're failing — and we fail a lot," said Askew.