Welcome to the Smart Set. Every morning we bring you the gossip coverage, filtered. Today: There's some awkward tension in the morning TV world, Kate Middleton might go homeless, and Elle Macpherson has been canned.
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Though she gave a perfectly heartfelt, warm goodbye address on The Today Show yesterday, Ann Curry was not all sunshine and smooshy hugs when she left. No, apparently she and Matt Lauer can't even deal with each other, and Curry wouldn't even look at him during commercial breaks and she pointedly didn't give him a hug when she gave err'body else one. So the theory, or our theory at least, is that Curry is mad at Lauer for not standing up for her and not taking some of the blame for the show's sagging ratings, so now she straightup hates the dude. Meanwhile she and Al Roker finally had that quickie in the bathroom they'd been meaning to have for years while Natalie Morales did key bumps and watched, saying "Mmhm, yup, that's how you do it, do it that way, yes, yup..." Also, assumed new cohost Savannah Guthrie opened the door this morning to find a flaming bag of dog poop sitting on her porch while Curry giggled behind a shrub. Everything's wild now! [Us Weekly]
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Kate Middleton: Hobo? It's a legitimate question, as word swirls around that Kate, the future queen of all Britannia, may sleep on the street for a night to show support for a homelessness charity in London. There's some kind of actress who has done the overnight on the sidewalk before and she's trying to get Kate to do it, so maybe she will! Representatives of the British crown say it's absolutely not happening, but of course that's what they'd say. You can't know that she's doing it, because that would defeat the whole purpose. It has to be secret. So if you're walking around London some night in the near future and you see a "homeless woman" wearing a crown and furs and jewels saying "Please, I'm without home. Could you spare a few hundred pounds for a taxicab to the palace? I mean shelter? What does a taxi even cost? Thruppence? Tuppence? Six hundred pence? My god, I've no earthly idea! Isn't that droll? Isn't that positively droll? Oh dear me. Where's the champagne? I've a terrible headache." If you see that hobo, it's not just any regular hobo. It's Boy George. [People]
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Oh dear. Elle Macpherson has been fired as host of NBC's truly awful reality show Fashion Star. Which, oof. Getting fired from Fashion Star is like getting asked to leave a chain gang. The judges Nicole Richie, Jessica Simpson, and John Varvatos will stay on for the second season, but a new host is coming. Who should it be? Claudia Schiffer? Christy Turlington? An old Alphie robot wearing a wig? All are qualified! But only one can do it. [Page Six]
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Old drugs goat Charlie Sheen, usually such a calm and saturnine person, is threatening to sue over a supposedly false story that claimed that he recently trashed a Ritz Carlton hotel room in New York. Who would he sue, exactly? Well, it's not clear. Maybe his computer, where he read the story? Maybe a dog he saw that he didn't like the look of? Maybe the Ritz Carlton hotel, which showed reckless indifference by letting him stay at their hotel in the first place. Point is, someone's to blame, and it's most definitely not Charlie Sheen. Because, c'mon, the guy's a saint. An angel. He's done nothing in his life that would earn him a fake story or two about doing something bad in a hotel room. Where does the liberal media even get this stuff?? [TMZ]
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Liddy and Bob Dole had a birthday party for their dog recently. The dog's name is Leader. Which is sad. "At least one of us got to be leader," Bob Dole often says to the pooch, staring wistfully at an empty bottle of Viagra pills and waiting for Liddy to get out of the bathroom. The truly important thing about this story is the photo accompanying it, which is so wistful and human that it kind of breaks your heart. Look at that wallpaper! And look at that lady behind Liddy, clearly some kind of time traveler from a dinner party in 1967. It's truly something. [Reliable Source]
Mike Allen's 15-year-old nephew is currently touring the United States Military Academy in West Point because he might want to go there and someday become an Army Ranger. That's just a fact that Mike Allen felt he needed to share with everyone, so we felt we should let you know. It's important news, news that you should definitely be reading about at the top of a daily politics column. Good luck to you, young Morgan. May you tour the West Point thing and then quickly decide to go to a school with more girls because, c'mon, that's where it's at. [Playbook]