Alyssa Milano: 'I Don’t Think Any Mom’s Natural Instinct Is to Let a Baby Cry'

Alyssa Milano with her husband, Dave Bugliari, and their kids, Elizabella and Milo. (Photo: John Shearer/Invision for DHX Media/AP Images)

Actress and mom of two Alyssa Milano — beloved for her roles in Who’s the Boss?, Charmed, and Mistresses — is an advocate for mothers. She has posted photos of herself breastfeeding on social media, complained about the struggle to lose the baby weight, and vented about the obstacles to pumping, as when officials at Heathrow Airport made her dump out her breast milk. The fashion designer, who hosts Project Runway All-Stars and has her own Touch by Alyssa Milano line of women’s fan gear, spoke to Yahoo Parenting in May about the joys and struggles of motherhood. We caught up with her again to discuss baby weight, sleep training, and the pleasures of having two kids.

Recently, you tweeted about the difficulty of losing the last of your baby weight, noting, “This last 10-15 pounds of baby weight is a BITCH.” I think most moms can relate to that struggle. How do you handle the frustration?

I’m trying not to worry about it too much. Obviously those pounds are put on for a very important reason — that’s my sweet babies. I’m trying to look at it as building my endurance back up so I can work a full day and not be exhausted. I’m still breastfeeding, and it takes a lot of energy to make all that milk. So I know it’s about maintaining and being healthy so I can get through the day without taking a nap.

Related: Alyssa Milano on Having Kids at 38, Baby Weight, and the Fight to Breastfeed

Actress Alyssa Milano has opened up about the difficulty of losing her baby weight. (Photo: Jason Merritt/Getty Images)

What do you say to other moms going through a similar struggle?

The only advice I could ever give another mom, in any area, is be kind to yourself. You’re not always going to have perfect days—it’s hard work. You have to be kind.

Father’s Day is right around the corner. Do you have anything planned?

I’ve gotta get on it. I haven’t even given it an ounce of thought yet!

Related: Alyssa Milano Shares Intimate Breastfeeding Photo

Alyssa Milano at a football game with her husband, Dave Bugliari. (Photo: milano_alyssa/Instagram) 

Is your husband a very involved dad? Splitting the parenting duties can be so hard.

He’s very, very involved. It’s a true partnership — I feel like he would breastfeed if he could.

Does he split nighttime duties with you, too? Or is that harder since you are still nursing?

Actually, Elizabella [now 9 months old] has slept through the night since she was 6 weeks old, so we don’t really have nighttime duties.

Actress Alyssa Milano with her daughter, Elizabella. (Photo: milano_alyssa/Instagram)

Six weeks old! What’s your secret?

She’s just a baby — there’s no secret. I put her down at 7:30 and she sleeps until 6:30. But my son still gets up in the night. I enjoy that he comes into bed with us. I know that that’s not going to be around much longer.

Sleeping through the night at 6 weeks old, you’ll be the envy of every new mom. But there’s no magic formula — just luck?

I think instincts are the magic formula. My personal opinion is that people have created the concept that a baby has to sleep through the night to make money. It’s a business. I don’t sleep through the night — I toss and turn and get up to go to the bathroom — so to expect our babies to do it, and try to train them to do it? I think it’s part of our business mentality of trying to make money off of people’s weaknesses. We need to rely on instinct. I don’t think any mom’s natural instinct is to let a baby cry.

How does Milo like being a big brother?

He is so in love with his sister, it’s crazy. I’m convinced I’m going to walk into her room one day and he will be lifting her out of her crib. It’s everything you hope for when you have a second child — to give that first child a friend for life and provide all those super-rewarding aspects of having two. I was a little worried. A lot of my friends had second kids and had all that sibling rivalry. But Milo [who is 3 years old] takes it very seriously. His bedtime is after hers, and every night he looks in on her, saying, “I’m going to check on my sister.” It’s the sweetest.

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