The Republican National Committee’s contribution this year are these e-cards that you can send to share a chuckle with a fellow Republican, or use to troll your political frenemies. A totally unscientific Yahoo News poll judged the Vladimir Putin one the best, with “If you like this Valentine, you can keep it” a close second.
But wait — there’s more. Or at least, there could have been. Here, courtesy of two Republican officials, are some of the committee’s jokes that didn’t make the cut “for various reasons.”Those reasons should be as obvious as some of the would-be quips themselves.
1) "I'll change positions for you" (featuring Charlie Crist, the Republican turned Democrat running for governor of Florida).
2) Let's keep our love a secret: We'll only announce it on MSNBC.
3) Sorry, the Love Doctor is no longer in your network.
4) Even if I could buy your love, we can't afford it. Xoxo, DNC
5) I can’t exempt you from the mandate to be my valentine.
6) Let's redistribute some love this Valentine's. Love, Elizabeth Warren
7) Don't cry for me Argentina; the truth is I never met you. Kisses, Noah Mamet, Nominee for Ambassador to Argentina