If These 22 Tweets Sound Familiar, You're Probably Married
Like many things in life, marriage is all about perspective.
The little annoyances and quirks that come with sharing your life with another person can either be a total drag or a real hoot, depending on how you look at them. Below, 22 relatable tweets that remind us married life can be pretty hilarious.
wife: Do that thing I like
me *uses a coaster*— Josh (@iwearaonesie) August 30, 2017
Relationship status: Married so long that my wife thinks I’m smelling up the bathroom on purpose
— Boyd's Backyard™ (@TheBoydP) September 8, 2017
It's not cheating. Or money issues. Leaving drawers and cabinets open is the true test of a marriage.
— J (@junejuly12) September 5, 2017
They say all good things must come to an end...
After 7 wonderful years of marriage...
I walked in on my wife...
Watching Twilight..— Will Rodgers (@WilliamRodgers) September 6, 2017
It’s less awkward picking up my wife’s period supplies than giving her coffee order at Starbucks.
— mark (@TheCatWhisprer) September 4, 2017
Tell me how tired you are so I can upstage you and tell you how much more tired I am.
-marriage— Mommy Owl (@Lhlodder) September 2, 2017
Wife: Sometimes women like bad boys.
Me: Well I just replaced real garlic in this recipe with powdered garlic.
Wife: *fans herself*— Brian Russell (@TheUnderfold) July 27, 2017
[Married Pillow Talk]
Husband: Tell me what you want..
Me: I want you to take our kid to soccer practice tomorrow.— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) August 14, 2017
I cannot hate on cargo shorts. My husband is a walking diaper bag in those things. I'm getting him the matching vest to hold water bottles.
— Mary (@AnniemuMary) June 18, 2017
I tell my husband that I love him but I'm also territorial about the good cheese in the fridge because balance is healthy in marriage.
— Tired Working Mom (@WorkingMom86) September 3, 2017
[Target]
Me: We're just picking up a few things, right?
Wife: *evil cackle*— James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn) September 10, 2017
If you marry someone a few years older, one thing they love is when any classic rock song comes on and you ask "Is this Led Zeppelin?"
— Elizabeth Hackett (@LizHackett) September 30, 2015
My wife and I both separately went to the grocery store hungry, and now we have 25 lbs of snacks
— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) September 11, 2017
ME: my husband wears a pair of jorts the week I'm ovulating
DOCTOR: no i meant are you on any form of hormonal birth control
ME: ah. no.— Valerie (@ValeeGrrl) August 25, 2017
Me [sits down to stack of pancakes and bacon]
Wife: What happened to eating healthier?
Me: Ugh. Fine. [puts single blueberry on pancake]— Rodney Lacroix (@moooooog35) September 11, 2017
I am never more attracted to my husband than when he's looking for a coupon before we go inside a restaurant.
— Cathryn (@AngryRaccoon2) September 7, 2017
Here, let me do that
-me when my wife is almost done with some chore— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) August 31, 2017
It's my wife Carmens Birthday today please join me in wishing that I don't do anything to piss her off today.
— Scott B. (@ScottwB46) September 10, 2017
(sends raven to my husband)
"Dude, seriously, what do want for dinner?"— Jawbreaker (@sixfootcandy) August 31, 2017
To ensure the safety of others and prevent the demise of your marriage, never start a home improvement project with your spouse.
— Wἶղε Cհმɾოεɾ (@Wine_Charmer) September 2, 2017
If you use karate instead of a knife your wife won't ask you to cut the vegetables anymore
— Josh (@iwearaonesie) September 7, 2017
Wife: *laughing uncontrollably* So THIS is your midlife crisis??
Me: *struggles to get out of a Mazda Miata*— Son of Dad (@Steven37366100) September 11, 2017
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This article originally appeared on HuffPost.