Monday, November 26
Watch: Humor us here, but "Guacamole 5 Ways" with co-host Carson Daly sounds kind of amazing. (We really love guac. They're also making margaritas, and that can sometimes go hilariously wrong.) Check it out on "Rachael Ray." Lily Tomlin is on "The Late Late Show," and "Ocean's" franchise fans should check out Tavis Smiley; he's got Andy Garcia.
Skip: Letterman's off all week. So are Fallon and Carson Daly. In the active-avoidance department, Carrot Top is on "Live with Kelly and Michael."
Tuesday, November 27
Watch: Susan Lucci gets her closet weeded on "Rachael Ray," while Mike Tyson is on with Kimmel. Reliably awesome one-linerer Dolly Parton ("It costs a lot of money to look this cheap") is on "The Colbert Report." Mel Brooks is on Conan ("It's pronounced 'Eye-gore'"). Joan "No Seriously I Am Actually 79 Years Old" Collins is on "The View," hopefully with her teenage husband (get it, Joan), and they have Peter Billingsley, the star of the original "A Christmas Story," on with the cast of Broadway's "A Christmas Story." Helen Hunt and Bryan Adams have a weird-guest-combo moment on "The Talk."
Skip:Pauley Perrette on "The View," unless they confront her about why she's letting the "NCIS" brain trust make her wear her hair like that. She's 43 years old! Characters evolve! Her hairline's coming apahhhhht!
Wednesday, November 28
Watch: Damian Lewis of "Homeland" is on Kimmel, and Neil Young hits "The Daily Show." Kevin McKidd is on "The Talk." (With Dolly Parton. Love it.) And today's weird-guest trifecta hits on "Ellen": Khloe Kardashian, Damian Lewis, and Jane Lynch of "Glee."
[Related: Get "Homeland" recaps here on Yahoo! TV]
Skip: Billy and Kit get acupuncture on "Access Hollywood Live." Needle-phobes, take note.
Thursday, November 29
Watch: A somewhat slow day, but you can catch Dick Van Dyke on "Conan" and the always-game Christina Applegate on "Ellen."
Skip: Still got a politics hangover? Avoid Leno, who's got Newt Gingrich. If you don't think Jim Belushi is very funny, he's not likely to rise in your esteem on "The View."
Friday, November 30
Watch: Weird guest combo on "The Late Late Show" with "vintage" SNL-er Tim Meadows and Mayim "Blossom" Bialik (will she discuss her divorce?). We think Melanie Lynskey is criminally underrated; find out yourself when she's on "The Talk."
[Related: Bialik, husband announce divorce]
Skip: DIY lip gloss on "Rachael Ray." We're all for saving money on beauty products, but a tinted lip balm is, what, $1.99?
Watch the "Dick Van Dyke Show" episode where Rob Petrie ends up in the clink, right here:
Dear Mrs. Petrie, Your Husband Is In Jail