R.O.C.K. in the U.S.A.! Musical Fireworks for 4th of July Fun

When we contemplate that nationalistic day of revelry known as the 4th o’ July, many all-American images spring to mind: bovine flesh roasting on the BBQ grill, human flesh roasting in the sun, all sorts of hazardous explosives roasting up what’s left of the ozone layer. But when it comes to flag-wavin’ summer fun that even an obsessively SPF 70-slathered vegetarian can appreciate, there’s really no better way to paint the town red, white, and blue than with a playlist of patriotic pop.

Here are our personal picks for star-spangled tunes truly worthy of your pledge of allegiance. It’s quite a musical melting pot, with mainstream girl-pop, bizarro shock-rock, and obscure powerpop tossed into the mix… but really, only a diverse list would accurately represent this great, diverse country, right?

“1976,” Redd Kross – The theme song for the hilarious David Cassidy/Leif Garrett/Redd Kross/Devo bicentennial cult flick Spirit of ‘76 will have you boogie-ing till you’re seeing stars. This soundtrack really needs to be back in print again.

“America,” Neil Diamond – In his 1980 classic, Neil welcomes the downtrodden immigrant masses to our fair shores with so much blustery Broadway bravado, it’s surprising that he doesn’t scare all the new green card-carrying arrivals into getting right back on a train, plane, or automobile and returning to their native lands. But Neil’s anthem definitely has a certain naïve, celebratory charm.

“American Boy,” Estelle with Kanye West – Not only does the British-born Estelle like boys on this side of the pond, but she has a thing for short men, too (her crush in this song is 5'7", and he’s just her type). Good for her for not discriminating!

“American Girl,” Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers – A fine slice of sour-apple pie from one of Americana’s finest songwriters, this down-home tune is wistful, gritty, and sad, yet still retro-poppy enough to slip into the tape deck while cruising in the ol’ Mustang convertible. Tom Petty is nothing less than a national treasure.

“American Idiot,” Green Day – Want your friends to pogo like idiots at your Indie Day party? Then crank this up. Heck, even the Broadway version would work.

“American Kix,” Candy – Before Gilby Clarke replaced Izzy Stradlin in the ever-mutating Guns N’ Roses lineup, before he was doing the Stonesy rock thing in his little-known Kill for Thrills or going the reality-TV route on Rock Star: Supernova, there was Gilby’s bubblegum pop band, the appropriately named Candy. Candy’s one disposable fluffball of an album contained sticky-sweet treats like this teen-power party anthem, all about having fun while you’re still too young and foolish to know better. Conjuring high school memories of ditchin’ class, breakin’ curfew, and guzzlin’ plain-wrap brew in the Circle K parking lot, this song sounds like an outtake from the Fast Times at Ridgemont High soundtrack, and we can’t think of anything more party-hardy American than that.

“American Music,” Violent Femmes – The Femmes’ trademark creeped-out, geeked-out nerd-rock has always had a certain folksy, from-the-heartland, disturbed-boy-next-door quality to it. If this singalong campfire ditty didn’t have that one line about “taking too many drugs,” we’d almost say it was downright wholesome.

“America Must Be Destroyed,” GWAR – Here’s a marvelous example of free speech in the States. Once upon a time, a bunch of art students dressed up as cardboard gargoyles, simulated sex ‘n’ slaughter onstage, and advocated the overthrow of our government. But did they get thrown in the stockade for treason? Nope. They racked up gold records and even got nominated for a Grammy! You gotta love America. (Side note: Rest in peace this 4th, Oderus Urungus. Enjoy those fireworks at what is sure to be the best heavy-metal Independence Day party in the sky.)

“Firework,” Katy Perry – Yes, it’s an obvious choice. So? This makes up for Candy, GWAR, X, and Redd Kross being on the list.

“If I Was President,” Wyclef Jean – Wyclef, who actually filed for candidacy in the 2010 Haitian presidential election, may have been born in Haiti, but his protest anthem from 2006 feels like traditional American rebel music.

Fourth of July,” X – Like the Waitresses with “Christmas Rapping” or Adam Sandler and his “Hanukkah Song,” back in the mid-'80s, Los Angeles punks X did the savvy thing and released a single that would guarantee them radio play at least one day per year. Unfortunately, the group’s Exene Cervenka recently ticked off a bunch of Americans when she exercised her freedom of speech in the craziest way possible, with some controversial remarks about the UCSB shootings. That was unfortunate. But she did apologize, and this is still a great song. So this 4th, give X their one deserved day in the (big black) sun, and turn this tune up.

“I’m Afraid of Americans,” David Bowie with Trent Reznor – OK, so this isn’t the most patriotic of tunes. But what more of an ego-boosting reminder of U.S. omnipotence and supremacy is there than the ultra-cool Bowie — one of Britain’s coolest rock stars of all time — actually claiming “God is an American”?

“Kids in America,” Kim Wilde – Kim’s not from around these parts, which may explain her sketchy geographical references in this 1981 hit. “New York to East California”? Has anyone reading this ever heard of a region commonly known as “East California”? (That’s almost as bad as Journey’s reference to “South Detroit.”) And what was Kim trying to say — that the New Wave sensation sweeping the nation stopped just short of the West Coast? Anyhoo, this anthem is still a sure hit at any American backyard blowout, in any part of the country. You can also check out the Muffs’ rendition, off the Clueless soundtrack, which retains all the sass and geographical cluelessness of Kim’s original but tosses in a little all-American punk snottiness for good measure. (You can skip No Secrets’ Radio Disney version, however.)

“Living in America,” James Brown – The late, great JB will always be a bona fide American icon, along with Rocky Balboa, the hero of Rocky V (or Rocky IV, or VI, or XIIIIIVXC, or whatever), the flick in which this strident power-jam made its triumphant debut. Come to think of it, Weird Al Yankovic, who remade this tune as “Living With a Hernia,” is an American icon, too. Only in the USA, right?

“Magic America,” Blur – This limey’s vision of the American Dream seems like a flattering enough depiction, what with its references to the all the “beautiful people” on this side of the Atlantic. But something about singer Damon Albarn’s cheeky delivery makes us suspect that he’s just confirming American hipsters’ worst fear: that Brits just might be cooler than us Yanks.

“National Anthem,” Lana Del Rey – This one makes the list mainly for its amazing, robbed-at-the-VMAs music video, in which Lana bravely takes on the roles of possibly the most worshipped female American icons of all time: Marilyn Monroe and Jackie Kennedy. The almost eight-minute mini-movie, which stars A$AP Rocky in the John F. Kennedy role, begins with Lana serenading A$AP with “Happy Birthday” (mimicking Marilyn’s famous 1962 performance for JFK), before going on to chronicle the glamorous life of what has to be the hippest, sexiest, swinging-est First Couple ever to rock the White House.

“Party in the USA,” Miley Cyrus – Admit it. You like this song. Put your hands up, nod your head like “yeah,” move your hips like “yeah,” and just sing along. Here’s Miley’s post-Bangerz makeover version, live in London.

“Paul Revere,” Beastie Boys – Hey, kids! Rap can be educational! You’ll totally ace your next American Revolution exam if you just memorize Mike D, Ad-Rock, and MCA’s 100 percent historically accurate lyrics here.

“Yankee Rose,” David Lee Roth – American hero/horndog Diamond Dave managed to sexualize something as pure and sacred as our Statue of Liberty, refashioning her as a freewheeling libertine with his vaguely sleazy double entendres about her “flag unfurling” and making the men “salute.” Apparently Lady Liberty must carry a torch for Dave (heh), but can you really blame her?

“You Can Still Rock in America,” Night Ranger – Night Ranger aren’t doing as much rocking in America as they used to (although guitarist Joel Hoekstra has played in Rock of Ages and with the Trans-Siberian Orchestra, which kind of rocks). But they’re still around, and the proud and simple message of their unofficial national anthem still rings true.

“Young Americans,” David Bowie — Whaddya know: Bowie’s the only guy to make this list twice, and he’s not even a Yank! But his 1975 appropriation of the American genre known as “blue-eyed soul” is still thoroughly convincing… especially since he once had national treasure Luther Vandross helping him out on backup vocals. We miss them both.

“You Shook Me All Night Long,” AC/DC – This isn’t a song about America per se, and it’s by an Australian band. But who can ignore this tune’s homage to the fleshy assets of our nation’s cornfed beauties — i.e., “knockin’ me out with those American thighs”? Certainly not the cornfed beauties in the recently reunited Veruca Salt, who named their 1994 debut album after that classic line.

Schoolhouse Rock’s “America Rock" – This 1970s “infotainment” TV series helped an entire generation scrape through history class. The most memorable and memorizable of all Schoolhouse Rock musical lessons had to be “I’m Just a Bill,” although the frisky “No More Kings,” righteous “Shot Heard 'Round the World,” easy-to-recite “Preamble,” utopian “Great American Melting Pot,” and feisty hot-mama rocker “Sufferin’ Till Suffrage” also made learning fun. You might want to skip the paternalistic and lamentably outdated ode to Manifest Destiny, “Elbow Room,” though…

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