Flashback Q&A: The Lost Space Ghost Interview

Over the weekend, the cartoon community sadly lost one of its greats, C. Martin Croker — an animator and voice actor who played both Zorak and Moltar on the ‘90s cult TV classic Space Ghost Coast to Coast, a show that over its 10 seasons welcomed a wide range of esteemed (and often confused) musical guests, from Shirley Manson to Hanson, Bjork to Thom Yorke, the Bee Gees to Beck, Weird Al to Alice Cooper, David Byrne to Pat Boone. To honor Croker in the most awesome way imaginable, Adult Swim put almost every episode of Space Ghost Coast to Coast online for free, making the Internet a much, much better place.

So this seemed like the perfect time to wipe the space-dust off our classic Q&A with the show’s interstellar emcee, Space Ghost himself, conducted in 1997 to promote the animated superhero-turned-host’s first proper rock album, Space Ghost’s Musical BBQ. It’s out of this world.

YAHOO MUSIC: Hello, Space Ghost! How are you?

SPACE GHOST: I’m swell!

YAHOO MUSIC: You have a great speaking voice.

SPACE GHOST: Aw, aren’t you sweet? Aren’t you just little miss punky pie!

YAHOO MUSIC: You’re not the first to say that. Where are you calling from?

SPACE GHOST: I’m calling from scenic Atlanta, Georgia.

YAHOO MUSIC: You’re not calling from Outer Space, then?

SPACE GHOST: Um… oh, yeah, sure, sure… Outer Space, sure I am! You fooled me! Yes, here I am in scenic Outer Space!

YAHOO MUSIC: Don’t ruin this for me, Space Ghost! Don’t shatter the illusion! That’d be more traumatic than finding out Santa Claus doesn’t exist!

SPACE GHOST: Well, I don’t want to destroy this special moment.

YAHOO MUSIC: OK, Space Ghost, you’ve had a lot of career changes over the years. First you were a superhero, then a talk show host… and now you’re a budding rock star.

SPACE GHOST: I was a pool boy for a while, for Francis Ford Coppola. But that’s when things were going sour. Then of course, I got my show back.

YAHOO MUSIC: So for a while you hit rock bottom?

SPACE GHOST: Well, it wasn’t really bottom. But really, who wants to clean Francis Ford Coppola’s pool? Can you imagine? The beard alone! Twice a week I’d have to dive in and pull the beard out of the pool! He’d be down there flailing around…

YAHOO MUSIC: So your climb to the top wasn’t as glamorous as some might assume.

SPACE GHOST: Well, of course it was fast and easy in the beginning. Just BOOM! — there I was, a big star, fighting crimes, saving the universe, etc. Then all of a sudden — POW! Bye-bye. All over.

YAHOO MUSIC: Superheroes kind of fell out of fashion for a while…

SPACE GHOST: Yes, by the late ’60s everyone was in that happy child-flower mode, y’know. That’s when they were saying, [hippie voice] “Aw, man, the universe is groovy, Space Ghost!” So everything was fine. I no longer served a purpose — at least in the minds of simpletons. But of course, when it all broke loose again, guess who they called to come save the day?

YAHOO MUSIC: So how did the talk show come about?

SPACE GHOST: That was just one of those things where I tried to move with the times. You know, you’ve got to make yourself contemporary! Make yourself popular! Entertain the youth of America and at the same time, provide a valuable service!

YAHOO MUSIC: Well, I have to commend you, because you went more the Rosie O’Donnell/Mike Douglas route and did a variety show, instead of a sordid Geraldo-style tabloid talk show, which is obviously lucrative these days.

SPACE GHOST: I refused to do that. Oh sure, Ted [Turner] wanted me to do that. Yep, Ted, in spite of his conservative looks, was saying, “Hey, let’s do a show on two-headed calves!” But I said, “No Ted, I refuse. I will not do that.” And he said OK; somebody showed him a real estate book and he went off to buy another state. So that was a quick-lived idea.

YAHOO MUSIC: So, on your show, you’ve interviewed quite a few rock stars. Is it true that when Paul Westerberg was on your show, he walked out after the first question?

SPACE GHOST: Yes, it’s true. I think Mr. Westerberg didn’t realize what he had volunteered for! I felt bad, ’cause we’re all big fans of Paul’s, but apparently he weren’t gonna have nothing to do with some little cheesy cartoon.

YAHOO MUSIC: Anyway, now that you’re doing the rock thing, did you get any inspiration from past musical guests on your show?

SPACE GHOST: Well of course, Mr. Stipe’s been by, and he was a delight; we’ve had David Grohl, from…was it the Foo Fighters, is that the name of that peppy new group he’s in? Oh, the kids love those Foo Fighters! Who else have we had…

NINA, THE CARTOON NETWORK’S PUBLICIST: [breaking into the call] We’ve had Pavement, Metallica, the Ramones, Beck, George Clinton…

SPACE GHOST: See there? I pop up with one damn question, and suddenly I’ve got 15 people on the phone! Hey, who can tell me the periodic table sign for the element boron? I’d like somebody to get on that right away, please.

NINA: [Laughs]

SPACE GHOST: I’m not kidding, Nina!

NINA: I’ll work on it for you, Space Ghost. [Hangs up]

SPACE GHOST: We should keep asking them trivia questions. Let’s see… who circumnavigated the Africa tip? Hmmm, I wonder. Don’t you, Yahoo?

YAHOO MUSIC: That’s what you should do as your next project — you should host a game show!

SPACE GHOST: I would be more fun than that Ben Stein fellow. But enough about him! Let’s talk about my show! Ha ha ha, ha ha ha, ha ha ha, ha…

YAHOO MUSIC: So…

SPACE GHOST: Hold on, I’m not done…ha ha ha, ha ha ha, ha ha ha, ha ha ha…ha…ha..ha……ha. OK, I’m done. What were you saying, now?

YAHOO MUSIC: Like I was saying, you’ve done the crime-fighting thing, the talk show thing, now you’re doing the rock thing. So my question is: Why do you feel the need to keep reinventing yourself?

SPACE GHOST: We must reinvent ourselves. Otherwise, we become stagnant adults. I am actually going to create my own line of men’s and women’s briefs, hopefully in the next year or so.

YAHOO MUSIC: So that will be your next big challenge after this album?

SPACE GHOST: Yes. I’m going to have the Cartoon Network sellin’ them for me. It’ll cut down on labor costs. It’ll give the youngsters at the network something constructive to do, because the second they leave the building, they’re off blowing all their money on comic books and pennywhistles and whatnot. I’m going to be a good influence on them and teach them some responsibility.

YAHOO MUSIC: So, now that you’re a rock star, do you ever get any groupies, any space groupies?

SPACE GHOST: And how! Wait a minute — there’s some groupies banging on the door right now!

YAHOO MUSIC: Should I hold?

SPACE GHOST: Actually, I’m a lonely man. Nobody loves me. Everybody hates me. I’m going to eat some worms now. Hold on a minute — Space Ghost’s call waiting is kicking in. I’ll be right back! [About 20 seconds pass before Space Ghost returns] I’m sorry! My profound apologies! That was one of my many groupies! No, actually, that was a call for help on the interstellar hotline. There’s an unpleasant water situation developing in Peru. I’ve got to fly down there with a bunch of bottled water ’cause there’s a dysentery outbreak.

YAHOO MUSIC: So you’re still doing your superhero duties on the side? You must be a very busy man. When do you find the time to rock?

SPACE GHOST: Well, you find the time for the things you enjoy, am I right? I enjoy music, and as you can tell from some of the cuts on the album, I enjoy making my own music.

YAHOO MUSIC: What are your musical influences, Space Ghost?

SPACE GHOST: Of course, you got your Spike Jones, you got your Larry Blackman from Cameo, you got your Liza Minnelli — you gotta have Liza. Also a little bit of Oliver Nelson, Steely Dan back before they sold out, Ornette Coleman… And of course the popular group the Silly Defendants. They’re were more of a club group; they never really made it.

YAHOO MUSIC: So you have some “underground” influences, huh?

SPACE GHOST: Oh, yes. I’m also a huge Kecks fans — this band called the Kecks. Also the Toast Monkeys – -I don’t know if you’ve ever heard of them, but they’re very big where I’m from.

YAHOO MUSIC: You’re too underground for me.

SPACE GHOST: Am I? You know what I am? I’m Retro-Boy! I was retro when retro wasn’t retro.

YAHOO MUSIC: Is Nirvana an influence for you? You have a song called “Smells Like Cartoon Planet.” Was that inspired by Nirvana? Do you liken yourself to Kurt Cobain as a rock ‘n’ roll icon for a generation?

SPACE GHOST: Actually, when I was bellowing that song, I was thinking more along the lines of a meatloaf. Because let’s face it — who among us doesn’t love the delicious, meaty taste of meatloaf?

YAHOO MUSIC: Well, I’m a vegetarian…

SPACE GHOST: Are you? Sorry to hear that. If you like, I could send you some Space Ghost Simulated Meat Products. Mmmm!

YAHOO MUSIC: Are they animal-product-free?

SPACE GHOST: Er… um… yeah, sure, what you just said. You betcha!

YAHOO MUSIC: Who’s to say that Kurt Cobain wasn’t also thinking of meatloaf when he did “Smells Like Teen Spirit”?

SPACE GHOST: We’ll never know now. These are the mysteries of the ages.

YAHOO MUSIC: Did your advisors warn you not to pursue a rock music career? Did they think it would ruin your upstanding, spotless, superhero/role model image?

SPACE GHOST: No, my hangers-on would never even dare to tell me anything like that. They just go, “Oh yes, Mr. Ghost, anything you say! That’s a great idea! Tee hee hee!” They’re all a bunch of little suck-ups. They’ll do anything I tell them to. [Yelling] Who’s got that thing for boron figured out!?! They think I’m kidding. They sit there all day on the phone, yap yap yap. I ask for one thing — somebody get me the skinny on the boron — and have any of them piped up yet with the answer? No!

YAHOO MUSIC: How did you build this huge empire, where you can have these yes-men at your beck and call?

SPACE GHOST: Well, basically it’s Ted’s dough. We’re all living off Ted’s dough.

YAHOO MUSIC: You should write a book about your life story.

SPACE GHOST: You think? I could call it that: Living Off Ted’s Dough.

YAHOO MUSIC: After you do the underwear thing, of course.

SPACE GHOST: Yes, the underwear is first. I think that’s generally an appropriate way of living your life: The Underwear Is First. That could be the title of my book, too. Because who doesn’t begin their day with underwear?

YAHOO MUSIC: Yes, that’s one universal thing that everyone can relate to.

SPACE GHOST: Yes, I’m speakin’ to the people. I care about American broadcasting. I care about what you and your family watch.

YAHOO MUSIC: Wow, I’m touched.

SPACE GHOST: You know, speaking of the music thing, we’ve got our own musical coming up. It’s not just an album! Musical BBQ is just whetting my whistle! We got a musical coming up on the Cartoon Network. Steve Allen’s a guest and so is Andy Dick.

YAHOO MUSIC: Does it have plot?

SPACE GHOST: Does it have a plot? Ha ha ha! Do any of my shows, really?

YAHOO MUSIC: Any chance it’ll hit Broadway?

SPACE GHOST: Doubtful. That’d be one of those one-night things. It’d be like Ol’ Calcutta, only we’d have our clothes on. It’ll be more like off-off-off-Broadway.

YAHOO MUSIC: Maybe you can work the underwear thing into it — hawk the underwear on Broadway!

SPACE GHOST: Well, if you’ve ever hawked underwear, you know just how painful that can be.

YAHOO MUSIC: As far as the music goes, are you serious about turning it into a major career? Or is it just a side-project? Would you ever leave your talk show behind to pursue music?

SPACE GHOST: Actually, I have other goals first. The underwear thing is in my mind; and as I said, I would like to create a line of Space Ghost meat-like products. I mean, who doesn’t enjoy a good snack-log? What I have to do is come up with vegetarian snack-logs, for folks like you who don’t enjoy the flavor of seared dead animal flesh. Also, with the profits from this album, I’m also going to try to buy a True Value Hardware store in Lakeland, Florida. That’s one of my dreams.

YAHOO MUSIC: Do your ambitions know no end?

SPACE GHOST: You know, you gotta always be thinking. There’s no off-switch on the genius button!

YAHOO MUSIC: I suppose that’s how you got where you are today.

SPACE GHOST: [Yelling] Who has my information on boron!? Gee-whiz. They’re no help in a crisis, are they?

YAHOO MUSIC: They’re probably too busy scurrying around trying to round up your groupies.

SPACE GHOST: Whatever.

YAHOO MUSIC: Anyway, it was a pleasure talking to you, Space Ghost.

SPACE GHOST: Likewise! And keep watching my show; we would like you to be a regular member of our viewing audience!

YAHOO MUSIC: I already am.

SPACE GHOST: Great! That makes eight now!

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