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'Fifty Shades' and 'Jurassic World' Release Spoiler-Free Spoilers

June 18, 2014

Today, in honor of fictional sado-masochist Christian Grey’s birthday, the producers of the Fifty Shades of Grey movie released a brand-new photo of star Jamie Dornan in character. What is he doing in said photo? He’s driving a car! Now we totally know that the book’s notorious Christian-Grey-obeys-traffic-signals scene will be in the film. Way to ruin everything, producers!

Speaking of which, Jurassic World director Colin Trevorrow is also not respecting the no-spoiler bro code. A couple of weeks back, he expressed his frustration over the fact that World plot details had leaked online. “[It] was discouraging for everyone on our crew — not because we want to hide things from the fans, but because we’re working so hard to create something full of surprises,” he told SlashFilm. And then Trevorrow went ahead and leaked this photo on Twitter.

First of all, the caption on the picture says “Nights,” which gives away the fact that the entire movie will not take place in broad daylight. Then there’s a large, looming shadow on the street, clearly revealing that the Jurassic World set has streets. Finally you’re just going to come right out and show us the vague, barely-there outline of a T-Rex? Is nothing sacred?

In all seriousness, let’s call both of these examples the Loch Ness Monster method of spoiler prevention, in which filmmakers send out the most ambiguous pictures possible, hoping fans will speculate endlessly on what they mean. We look forward to the next on-set photo that shows us pretty much nothing!