‘Movie 43′ takes a world-class critical drubbing

Adam Pockross
Movie Talk

If we thought you’d be up for reading them all, we could probably find 43 scathing reviews panning “Movie 43.” But in an effort to help whittle down your weekend reading, we’ve narrowed it down to just the most humorously harsh snippets of criticism.

“Movie 43” is the brain-child (using the term loosely) of Peter Farrelly and his long-time producer Charles Wessler. Farrelly is of course one half of the infamous Farrelly Brothers, who have gifted us such comedy classics as “Dumb & Dumber” (1994) and “There’s Something About Mary” (1998).

[Related: Get local tickets and showtimes for 'Movie 43']

Perhaps on the strength of such an upstanding comedic resume, Farrelly was able to get a heap of Hollywood A-Listers to appear in this decidedly non-A-list fare, including Kate Winslet, Hugh Jackman, Uma Thurman, Naomi Watts, Greg Kinnear, Halle Berry, and Terrence Howard. And that’s just mentioning the Oscar nominees!

The film doesn’t really tell a story so much as it amasses a scatological series of sketches loosely strung together under the premise of a producer pitching ideas to executives. Alas, Farrelly’s utterly inappropriate “comedy” isn’t receiving a whole lot of critical yuks, but rather a dizzying array of yucks. However, the film certainly inspired some world-class drubbing…

“Well, if you mashed-up the worst parts of the infamous ‘Howard the Duck,’ ‘Gigli,’ ‘Ishtar’ and every other awful movie I’ve seen since I started reviewing professionally in 1981, it wouldn’t begin to approach the sheer soul-sucking badness of the cringe-inducing ‘Movie 43.’” -- Lou Lumenick, New York Post

“Movie 43 is painfully unfunny, inordinately stupid, and about as entertaining as a colonoscopy. If there's a worse film in 2013, I'll be very, very surprised.” -- Mike McGranaghan, The Aisle Seat

“…but as bad as SNL can be, it at least holds out the sweet release of a commercial break between dreadful sketches. There’s no such respite from the gauntlet of smutty, profane awfulness here.” --Nathan Rabin, A.V. Club

“Was someone holding Kate Winslet’s children hostage? Threatening to release compromising pictures of Emma Stone? Did Richard Gere or Hugh Jackman have gambling debts? It would have been fun in a sadistic way to put a camera on the actors as they watched the finished film for the first time and tremblingly called their agents.” -- David Edelstein, Vulture.com

“It provides me with a handy new answer to a question I’m often asked: ‘What’s the worst film you’ve ever seen?’” -- Peter Howell, Toronto Star

While it took a bit of Internet mining, we were able to uncover at least one moderately positive review...

“Movie 43” is gross, juvenile, disgusting, scatological, vile, reprehensible and in the worst possible taste. But heaven help me, I laughed.” -- Alonso Duralde, The Wrap

To be fair, Farrelly didn’t expect critics to like the film, which is probably why it wasn’t screened for them ahead of time. "By the way, this thing's going to get about an 8 on Rotten Tomatoes' meter. The critics are gonna freak out at this thing, but the college kids, high school kids, 20-somethings, and anybody who smokes weed is gonna flip out," Farrelly recently told Yahoo! Movies.

[Related: Peter Farrelly unleashes ‘Movie 43′ and prepares for the devolution of ‘Dumb and Dumber’]

And yes, we feel a little bad about pouring salt in the wound, but let’s be honest: Don’t all these dreadful reviews actually make you more interested in seeing just how bad the film could really be?

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