The X Factor 2017, third Six Chair Challenge: after all that drama, Loverine Fermino got the boot anyway

Well, that was tiring. The X Factor's cut-throat Six Chair Challenge is over for another year and, as ever, it was full of ludicrous twists and turns, some of which felt more scripted than others. Tonight, it was the turn of Nicole Scherzinger and Louis Walsh to decide which singers from their categories were most deserving of a plane/Megabus ticket to Judges' Houses but this is X Factor, so of course it wasn't as simple as that...

Nicole finally cobbles together the overs

Different day, more farce. Saturday night’s show ended on a cliffhanger, with the Six Chair Challenge audience booing unanimously at Nicole Scherzinger for ditching Talia Dean from her line-up in favour of Loverine Fermino… all of which was resolved pretty swiftly tonight as Nicole brought Talia back and got rid of some forgettable bloke instead. This was probably always going to be the outcome, but where would the fun have been in that?

To make matters sillier, Loverine – the very woman who’d inspired all this drama – ended up not making it into the final line-up anyway. Instead, twinkly-eyed, gravelly-voiced Essex boy Matt Linnen and, well, twinkly eyed, gravelly-voiced Middlesex girl Tracey-Leanne Jefford ended up joining Talia, plus Kevin Davy White, Berget Lewis and Slavko, in Nicole’s final (until Judges’ Houses…) line-up, a turn of events we could have predicted weeks ago, since they’re the Overs who’ve had the most airtime. 

Louis lives up to his reputation

While Simon Cowell and Sharon Osbourne are famed for their harshness as X Factor judges, we think it’s actually Louis Walsh who’s the most ruthless judge of all. He just doesn’t give a damn.

True to form (“it’s never easy with Louis,” said Dermot O’Leary from the wings), when it was Louis’s turn to whittle down the boys, he did it with a detached aloofness and total disregard for the feelings of the singers or the audience. Drama queen Nicole could learn a lot (although then the show wouldn’t be nearly so entertaining). 

X Factor winners and runners up - where are they now?

…which resulted in the most ridiculous Six Chair Challenge scenes ever

True to form, Louis decided it would be fun to chop and change his line-up willy-nilly – and, in ludicrous scenes, it was affable Leon Mallett who bore the brunt of the nonsense; ludicrous because poor Leon was auditioning on crutches after breaking his ankle playing football, and the poor man ended up having to hobble across the enormous Wembley stage numerous times in the name of entertainment. At one point Louis, seemingly without a hint of irony, told him to “get over there quick!” Dermot summed up events pretty well when he remarked, “This is ‘orrible!”

Is this The X Factor or The Notebook?

Louis Walsh might be a man incapable of showing genuine human emotion, but he sure managed to ham it up when dealing with relentlessly soppy Aidan Martin, one of the most promising singers on his line-up. Aidan, a 27-year-old barman, has looked on the verge of tears during most stages of the show (“it’s like therapy, you know,” he said of performing his own material, all of which seems to be about a traumatic break-up) and tonight it culminated in an insanely intense exchange with Louis which felt like it was straight out of a cheesy rom-dram. 

Louis: “You’re so emotional, but you’re so honest, you sing your heart out.“

Aidan: “I need a seat, Louis, I need a seat, I can do this, please believe in me, man.”

Louis: “I’m not losing you, no way, no way.”

Seriously guys, this is a TV talent show, not a dilemma over a life support machine. Still, we’re eagerly anticipating just how overblown things will get between Aidan and Louis when they’re gazing into each other’s eyes in front of the Barbados/Dublin sunset at Judges’ Houses.  

Anthony’s through… for now

Anthony Russell, a “rough diamond” from Liverpool, made it through the Six Chair Challenge with relative ease – albeit while wearing a tux that still had the price tag on – but we know that it’s since been announced that he’s been axed from the show after admitting to using drugs (which means Sharon referring to him as “Skippy”, due to his manic performance style, suddenly makes perfect sense). 

This, of course, means there’s a space going at Judges’ Houses, and we’re assuming  that one of the singers who didn’t make it through tonight, like Benji Matthews or Gregor Coleman, could well end up scraping through after all. Our money’s on Benji – he’s had an awful lot of airtime for someone who’s been ditched at this relatively early stage, and we’re not sure that Louis made the right decision in taking Spencer Sutherland through instead of him during the show’s climax: yet another sing-off. Spencer, all the way from Ohio, is a good singer but we can’t see him engaging with the audience in the same way that giggly Benji does. We guess we’ll find out next weekend…