Woman shares the rules she doesn’t ‘regret’ for online dating: 'Safety comes first'

A woman on Reddit shared a list of things she doesn’t regret doing while dating, and people had a lot to say in the comments.

The Reddit user took to the platform’s “Dating Advice” subreddit to post her personal list of dating dos and don’ts, tallying a total of 17 rules she keeps for herself when dating. Many of the rules were safety-driven, while others aimed to keep herself and her dates honest.

Young woman online dating
Credit: Getty Images

Some of the woman’s safety-inclined dating rules included using a Google number instead of a personal phone number because “it’s easier and free to change.” Another one is that she makes sure that her dates happen close to home and uses a ride-share service because “your [personal] license plate can help someone easily find you.”

She also writes that she shares her location and a photo of her date with a “trusted friend.” She also tells her date if and when she feels uncomfortable. If a situation like that comes up, she will ask the location’s staff to walk her to her car or ride share.

Anyone who’s ever dated online knows that people aren’t always honest about their appearance. To combat this, the Reddit user shares that she holds herself accountable to “being upfront and honest with what I look like and updating my photo if I gained/lost a significant [amount] of weight.”

In a similar vein, she makes sure to have “at least one long (over 30 minutes) phone call prior to the date,” and is sure to ask “important questions from the get go” like, “Are you married? Is anyone married to you? Do you have kids?” The user also notes that she asks these questions “in multiple ways.”

To improve the dating experience for herself, the Reddit user shares that she’ll often go to the same few spots for her first dates so she can get to know the staff. She also says that she takes her time to get ready.

“I don’t mean fussing over myself,” she explains. “Rather allowing myself to unwind for at least an hour after work (watching a show, having a glass of wine, taking a nap) so [I’m not] taking my day into my date.”

Redditors responded to her dating rules

People had a lot to say about her rules in the comments, and some even shared their own personal experiences in the dating world.

Some users found her safety-inclined rules to be a little too cautious, with one user calling the woman “overly paranoid.” But other commenters quickly came to her defense.

“Great advice. Some I have been using myself for years, since I started dating after breaking up [with my] previous long term partner. Safety comes first,” wrote one Redditor.

“Seems reasonable… safety first. Also, as a guy, I like the phone call thing, it either builds anticipation before meeting or it keeps you from wasting your time,” affirmed another Reddit user.

“I tried doing phone calls when I was dating. However, no woman ever answered a phone call. You get texts and that’s it. I’d still be a single dude if I had that as a rule,” noted a former singleton.

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