Time 100 Gala: Influential Millionaires Bring Out the Mesh, Glitter, and Capes

Photo:  Getty Images
Photo: Getty Images

The annual Time 100 Gala took place on Wednesday evening, and I see my invite once again got lost in the mail. Bummer, yes, but from the looks of it, I don’t think anything I own would’ve made the cut on the red carpet anyway, as my wardrobe is fairly lacking in mesh, glitter, opera gloves, and capes.

Who knows what this elite coterie of literary luminaries, human rights activists, supermodels, and internet shitposters had to talk about over the course of an evening. But however different they may be in terms of line of work, they certainly dressed on theme. Sans Doja Cat and Ali Wong stealing the show, the rest of the looks were fairly predictable: Nothing else quite hit as a slay, nor did anything reach catastrophically embarrassing levels of nay.

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Still, these very wealthy and celebrated people always manage to find their moments—the odd clutch purses, surprise color palettes, sneak peeks of what we’ll clearly all be wearing in the next couple weeks, etc. And the Time 100 carpet was no exception.

Until the Met Gala red carpet next week, then, I suppose!

Kim Kardashian in John Galliano

Photo:  Taylor Hill (Getty Images)
Photo: Taylor Hill (Getty Images)

That’s why I’m pretty surprised by how boring this look is—at least other than that mysteriously shaped makeup-bag-like satin Chanel clutch.

Salma Hayek

Photo:  Taylor Hill (Getty Images)
Photo: Taylor Hill (Getty Images)

I’m a little underwhelmed by this look, considering Salma Hayek’s track record of bonafide slays—the colors are weird, and the lace, beads, and glitter all feel a little out of place. At least she’s having fun with her train!

Austin Butler and Kaia Gerber

Photo:  Taylor Hill (Getty Images)
Photo: Taylor Hill (Getty Images)

Death, taxes, and Kaia Gerber-and-Austin Butler red carpet PDA are the only sure things in life these days. I’m into the clean simple lines of Gerber’s Khaite gown. It’s all very elegantly boring, but points for interesting footwear!

Doja Cat

Photo:  Taylor Hill (Getty Images)
Photo: Taylor Hill (Getty Images)

I’ll say it: Boobs. Boobs!!

One thing Doja Cat will do is give us a red carpet moment to talk about. The singer is no stranger to the naked dress, and I’m absolutely living for the strangeness and randomness of this one. Yet between the ruffles, asymmetry, and bonkers red leather gloves, it all just works!

Ali Wong

Photo:  Taylor Hill (Getty Images)
Photo: Taylor Hill (Getty Images)

Ali Wong absolutely killed in a traditional Vietnamese dress, regal headpiece and all. In the best possible way, she looks like a beautiful swan-queen.

Ashley Graham

Photo:  Taylor Hill (Getty Images)
Photo: Taylor Hill (Getty Images)

I generally subscribe to the belief that black is a very boring color to wear on a red carpet, but as a fan of shapes and tassels, I think Ashley Graham makes it work!

Drew Barrymore

Photo:  Dimitrios Kambouris (Getty Images)
Photo: Dimitrios Kambouris (Getty Images)

Thank you, Drew Barrymore, for giving us the first cape of the night! I’m hoping to see more of these at the Met Gala next week.

Myles Frost

Photo:  Taylor Hill (Getty Images)
Photo: Taylor Hill (Getty Images)

I was waiting for someone to pull up in a white suit and serve up yassified Hillary-Clinton-at-the-2016-DNC-convention vibes. Luckily, Tony Award winner Myles Frost did not disappoint.

Jennifer Coolidge

Photo:  Taylor Hill (Getty Images)
Photo: Taylor Hill (Getty Images)

Oooh. Ahhh. Look at this glam velvet beaded ensemble! I adore it, and especially the addition of the mesh gloves. My White Lotus girl, you never disappoint.

Lea Michele

Photo:  Taylor Hill (Getty Images)
Photo: Taylor Hill (Getty Images)

Disney princess gown with a weird devil horns neckline? Thanks, I hate it! (Maybe that’s a little harsh, but it’s not like she can read it anyway.)

Ronan Farrow and Natasha Lyonne

Photo:  Arturo Holmes (Getty Images)
Photo: Arturo Holmes (Getty Images)

OK, now we’re cooking with gas. I respect what Farrow’s trying to do and am generally a fan of a gold palette, though this look is kind of giving game show host. As for Lyonne, I salute her bold corset choice but am generally confused by the rest of the look.

Don Lemon and Tim Malone

Photo:  Taylor Hill (Getty Images)
Photo: Taylor Hill (Getty Images)

Big week for former CNN anchor Don Lemon... yes, he lost his gig at one of the biggest cable networks in the biz, but according to Time, at least, he remains influential.

Amy Poehler

Photo:  Taylor Hill (Getty Images)
Photo: Taylor Hill (Getty Images)

It’s simple, chic, glittery, and a gorgeous shade of lavender, but to be honest, I’ll probably forget it by the time I’m finished compiling this slideshow. It’s not especially memorable, but not every red carpet look needs to be!

Angela Bassett in Gaurav Gupta Couture

Photo:  Taylor Hill (Getty Images)
Photo: Taylor Hill (Getty Images)

This glitter pantsuit would probably look ridiculous on anyone else besides Ms. Bassett. Like, could you imagine anyone else holding a tiny boombox-purse and not getting meme-d?? God love her...

Padma Lakshmi in Marchesa

Photo:  Taylor Hill (Getty Images)
Photo: Taylor Hill (Getty Images)

I don’t know how I feel about this ruffled explosion of mesh (and a layered Marchesa dress feels very dated) but I do appreciate the soft indigo color palette and commitment to silver accessories.

Aubrey Plaza in Carolina Herrera

Photo:  Jamie McCarthy (Getty Images)
Photo: Jamie McCarthy (Getty Images)

We do love a cape moment, but being staunchly anti-peplum, I don’t love the awkward silhouette. And the red on red on red is, unfortunately, a bit dizzying.

Cindy McCain

Photo:  Taylor Hill (Getty Images)
Photo: Taylor Hill (Getty Images)

Cindy McCain, widow of the late Sen. John McCain, beat the “Republican women have no sense of fashion” allegation with this little floral number. The pearl (?) necklace is a little odd with this, but I won’t lie, I love the splash of color with the embroidered flowers.

Eve Jobs and Su Park

Photo:  Patrick McMullan (Getty Images)
Photo: Patrick McMullan (Getty Images)

Appropriately named Apple heiress Eve Jobs (right) and designer Su Park (left) are secretly coordinated here, thanks to the purple accent on Park’s black dress. Big fan of both these looks!

Jon Batiste

Photo:  Taylor Hill (Getty Images)
Photo: Taylor Hill (Getty Images)

Oh, we love a man who can pull off periwinkle. It’s clean, it’s simple, and it serves up something I can never get enough of on these red carpets: actual color!!!

Steve Lacy

Photo:  Taylor Hill (Getty Images)
Photo: Taylor Hill (Getty Images)

Steve Lacy is a proven red carpet fashion icon at this point, yet I’m still impressed. He managed to take one of the most boring colors one could possibly wear on a red carpet and make it something chic and unexpected. A mesh cape will really do the trick!

Michael B. Jordan

Photo:  Kevin Mazur (Getty Images)
Photo: Kevin Mazur (Getty Images)

No, Michael B. Jordan didn’t grace us with a red carpet appearance, lest he accidentally look very sad and single and give the internet yet another little meme. But look at this man in a purple suit and tell me he wasn’t Taylor Swift’s muse for “Lavender Haze.”

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