The mind is an astonishing thing; our imaginations, elastic, unfettered, are capable of producing the most amazing dreams. And sexual fantasy is in many ways like dreaming while awake. Forbidden fruit is the most common female fantasy, scenarios and images that are unlikely to happen in real life.
*Older women are likely to fantasize about making love with a much younger man, or a man of a different ethnicity, or a man who's lower than them on the social scale. (Hence the fantasy of the pool man or the delivery boy).
*Quickie sex with a total stranger, usually on a plane or train.
*Being overwhelmed and taken against their will, which is why fantasies about being raped (but not painfully or violently) are surprisingly prevalent.
*Sex with another woman, even if they don't consider themselves to be lesbian.
*Sex with someone who cares for them in some authorized, legitimate capacity, such as a doctor or priest.
*For younger women, "Daddy" fantasies about older men. Older women may fantasize about their sons' much younger, attractive friends.
*Romantic scenarios in which the partner is a blur, taking a back seat to what's more appealing to the woman, such as location and setting-for example, making love on the deserted beach of a beautiful island.
The wonderful thing about fantasy is that it's all between your ears. Nothing in a fantasy is wrong or illegal because it's not real: it's fantasy. The important thing to know about fantasy is that it keeps us alert and alive. Sexual curiosity in real life can lead to real trouble, but in our imaginations, anything and everything is possible.
In your sexual imagination, don't censor, don't put the brakes on, don't condemn or deny. Your imagination is the one thing in life you completely own. Don't forfeit your right to enjoy it. When it comes to sexual fantasy, let your imagination run free. It's totally yours. And whether or not you choose to share it with anyone else is your choice.
Eve Marx writes frequently about sex for ThirdAge.com.
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