The Bedpost Interview: Marshall Miller & Dorian Solot

Meet the cutest couple in sex education: Marshall Miller and Dorian Solot. If we were a couple instead of best friends, this is who we'd aspire to be. They've traveled across the country and presented over 400 programs on sexual health and responsible intimacy, safer sex, female orgasm, GLBTQ issues, and more. Check out their website, SexualityEducaxtion, and buy their book, the awesomely titled I Love Female Orgasm, to learn more.

Em & Lo: How and why did you get into a sex-related career? Did you ever have another direction you thought your future career might take?

Marshall: At one point I thought I'd be a journalist, but writing about sex is so much more fun. I double-majored in college: English and Sexuality & Society. At the time, people would ask, "Have you thought about what it'll be like to have the words 'Sexuality & Society' on your transcript, your diploma, your resume? Your future employers might freak out!" The reality is that no one's freaked out--my Sexuality & Society degree has gotten me jobs and opened countless doors. How many doors has my English degree opened? None.

Is sex like pizza, even when it's bad it's good? Why or why not?

Dorian: No. Bad sex is just bad.

M: With bad pizza, at least after you've eaten you're not hungry anymore. Not so for bad sex.

How does your work affect your sex life?...

M: You may have heard the saying, "When all is said and done, more is said than done."

D: But that said, writing an orgasm book as a couple is REALLY fun. You wouldn't want to have anything in there that isn't accurate, so you have to be sure you test it out...


Most underrated erogenous zone?

D: The mouth. It's like a whole universe in there!

Favorite on-screen sex scene?

D: The snails getting it on to opera music in Microcosmos. Wow. Makes you sort of jealous you don't have a slimy underbelly and tentacles.

M: The first sex scene between Jeremy Irons and Juliette Binoche in Louis Malle's film Damage is a brilliant example of bad sex. Binoche's arms stick straight out like a marionette or an overinflated blow-up doll, and, Irons, seemingly unaware of the concept of foreplay, lasts a total of 55 seconds (count them for yourself on YouTube).

Desert island sex-toy?

D: As long as I had my hand, I'd be happy. I'd be the one negotiating, "Can I skip the toy and bring my laptop? That way I can get some work done."

Best sex advice you've ever given or received?

D: My first year of college, I was so clueless I actually asked a gay male friend whether oral sex on a man should involve blowing air (as in " ----- ") or sucking in (as in "sucking him off"). He took the question very seriously, considered it for a moment, concluded, "Neither," and proceeded to give me an excellent overview of oral sex basics.

Dead historical person you'd have sex with if you could (alive, of course)?

D: I don't know--for me, so much of sex appeal has to do with that spark, that live connection. When you're just looking at photos or drawings, it's hard to get that sense. Did Joan of Arc have that je ne sais quois? Did Thomas Edison's eyes have that electric spark?

M: If I could travel back in time, I think I'd rather watch than participate. Wouldn't it have been amazing to be a fly on the White House bedroom wall during the JFK presidency? Or to see what was really going on in those Roman baths? These were before the days of camcorders and the Starr Report to keep track of all the details.

Rate the following in order of importance, from greatest to least: sex, love, money, fame, chocolate, Facebook.

M: Love, sex, money, chocolate, Facebook, fame.

D: I answered this separately and came up with the exact same order. Maybe that's why we're so compatible. Though true to gender stereotypes, I consume more chocolate than Marshall does.

Is there any other new project you'd like to mention?

M: After all these years of teaching about safer sex, last year we decided to venture into the the world of sex for procreation. All that stuff they teach in high school about the sperm and the egg? It actually works. Now we have the coolest little baby! She's just beginning to giggle -- what a fantastic stage of life.


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