The Dos and Don'ts of Getting Noticed on a Dating Site

by Gena Kaufman

CN Digital Archive
CN Digital Archive

Online dating is more popular than ever, but how's a girl supposed to stand out from the crowd and get guys to notice her? We spoke with Whitney Casey, relationship expert for Match.com, to get some insider tips on how to draw maximum attention to your profile. Read on for the Dos and Don'ts of an attention-worthy online dating profile.

Don't: Be too brief.
"Size does matter," says Casey, at least when it comes to your profile. The most popular users have more than the bare minimum of characters required. You don't have to write a novel for each section of your profile, but put in enough information to make your profile compelling.

Do: Be specific.
There are certain characteristics, like having a great sense of humor or enjoying travel, that practically everyone claims to have. Stand out from the masses by giving detailed examples. For instance, instead of saying "I'm adventurous," try "I'm an adventurous eater. Indian food is my favorite--the spicier the better."


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Don't: Distract attention from yourself.
Your main profile picture should be a clear shot of you and only you. No sunglasses, no pets, and no friends. Your face should be the focus--and it should have a genuine smile on it. This is not the time to test out your Blue Steel look.

Do: Hit refresh.

Many people create a profile when they initially join a site, then stick with it until they're off the market. But it's a mistake to use the exact same profile you had eight months ago. Instead, update every month or so with new and interesting things you've done recently (mention a great book you read) so that your profile reflects you as you are today.

Do: Give guys something to talk about.

The best way to get more men to contact you is to give them fodder for an easy opening line. Men are action-oriented, Casey advises, so it helps to give them a reason to contact you or date ideas to suggest. Mention a movie you've been wanting to see or a band you love so they have something to contact you about.


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Don't: Sit around waiting for someone to notice you.
Even if you're not having great luck lately, be active on the site daily. Browse matches, update your information, or answer some of those personality questions. This will make you show up more in a search, essentially putting you higher up in the queue for eligible suitors to see.

Do: Spell-check.
Grammatical errors and typos are a turn-off for everyone. You already know this, but it bears repeating. Review your profile like you would your résumé. You don't want to get overlooked because you forgot to proofread!

Don't: Fake it.

Portray a flattering but accurate version of yourself. Include a recent full-body picture, don't use Photoshop on your pics, and describe your life accurately. Because, after all, what's the point of getting someone interested in some fake version of you?


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