Ranking The Wildest “Love Is Blind” Moments From “Huh, Weird” To “Oh My God, How Is This Show Real?!”
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If you're a fan of reality dating shows, you know every single one is so chaotic that it kills any modicum of interest in romantic relationships by the time you get to the end of the season.
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Love Is Blind is no exception. Despite the premise of the show being incredibly wholesome — can you fall in love with someone without ever seeing them? — by the time we get to the altar, the season has become a never-ending cringefest of reasons to be alone forever.
If you're like me, and you *Marie Kondo voice* love mess, then you know the Lacheys have a chokehold on romantic train wrecks you can't look away from.
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So, without further ado, I present the most chaotic moments from all four seasons of Love Is Blind, ranked solely by how much acid reflux they bring up when I think of them. Scroll if you dare:
20.Sal drops Mallory in the sand.
Where To Watch: Season 2, Episode 4
Why It's Burned Into My Brain: Have you ever watched a rom-com unravel in real time? Now you have. You won't remember Sal or Mallory two seasons from now, but you will remember to never run in flip flops again.
19.Amber rejects Jessica's apology.
Where To Watch: Season 1, Episode 11
Why It's Burned Into My Brain: There's no one to root for in the feud between Amber and Jessica, especially considering it's over such an average man like Barnett. But damn, it made for a good reunion episode and continued on into Life After the Altar where Barnett told Jessica he wasn't allowed to talk to her or accept her gift at his first wedding anniversary party. This was when I realized Love Is Blind grudges will give us a lifetime of drama.
18.Danielle's brother asks Nick about their sexual activities.
Where To Watch: Season 2, Episode 7
Why It's Burned Into My Brain: The meeting the families is always my favorite part of any dating show because it is the one place where we get a hint of reality. Stay mad and grounded, parents! Your kids are absolutely doing something reckless! But one of my favorite all-time meeting of the families came in Season 2, when Danielle's brother asked her fiancé Nick, "How often are y'all sexually active?" There's no correct, polite answer to that. It's a trap. We know it, Nick knows it, and Danielle's brother knows it, too. But ultimately, it speaks to how open Danielle's family is, and it's one of the few funny and wholesome moments we get on the show.
17.Raven works out through Bartise's story of his parents' divorce.
Where To Watch: Season 3, Episode 2
Why It's Burned Into My Brain: Raven, my zero interest queen. Never before has man been so curved by the steady thump of jewelry and the even, controlled breaths that indicate exceptional form. This was the soundtrack to the story of how Bartise's parents' marriage began to fall apart, and neither Bartise nor I will ever forget it.
16.Irina tells Zack he looks like a cartoon.
Where To Watch: Season 4, Episode 4
Why It's Burned Into My Brain: The irony of Irina saying this to her future husband less than five minutes after seeing him for the first time after her behavior in the previous episode. Unsurprisingly, this interaction ends in the most uncomfortable hug I've ever witnessed outside an extended family Thanksgiving.
15.Shaina calls Shayne and Natalie's relationship fake and laughable.
Where To Watch: Season 2, Episode 6
Why It's Burned Into My Brain: At a cast bonfire, Shayne pulls Shaina aside to ask her why she offered to set Natalie, his fiancée, up with one of her millionaire friends if it doesn't work out. The argument escalates into Shaina calling Shayne and Natalie's relationship "fake" and "laughable," and going on to reveal that Shayne was her number one pick in the pods. She's clearly trying to feel out whether he still has feelings for her, and the ick factor is so high, I'm still thinking about it years later. You're basically watching a hot person realize that being hot isn't always enough, but what really sets the acid reflux going is that, at this point in time, Natalie thinks Shaina is one of her best friends on the show. Who needs enemies with friends like these?
14.Bliss's dad tells Zack it's not going to work out.
Where To Watch: Season 4, Episode 10
Why It's Burned Into My Brain: Another incredible meet-the-parents moment on the show, Bliss's dad straight up tells Zack it won't work out when he meets him. This isn't just him being an overprotective father, though, it's really about the fact that Zack chose Irina over Bliss initially and only went back to Bliss after Irina spurned him. I don't fault Zack for just wanting to be loved, but I am pro-Bliss's dad pointing out that this is not a good position from which to start a marriage.
13.Cole ranks Zanab a 9/10 after ranking Colleen a 10/10.
Where To Watch: Season 3, Episode 5
Why It's Burned Into My Brain: The beginning of the end. This was another couple doomed to fail from the start, but watching someone destroy their life with a mistake out of a 1980s rom-com was something I never thought I'd see in the year of our lord 2022. Without "Rank me," we'd never have gotten "You destroyed my confidence" at the altar, or the entire "Cuties" fiasco. I honestly wish I could give the whole soul-crushing experience back.
12.Raven and SK reveal they got engaged in the Life After the Altar special, only for the episode to end with Raven addressing SK's cheating scandal.
Where To Watch: Season 3, Episode 15
Why It's Burned Into My Brain: Again, this is my fault for believing in love on a reality show, but damn, this one hurt. My favorite sensible couple had done the sensible thing and made sure their relationship could work long distance before moving forward. All their efforts and growth had finally paid off, with a romantic engagement and them planning the logistics of moving in together when the episode suddenly cuts to Raven alone on a couch, reminding me love isn't real. Why must I endure this after finally finding a couple to root for? Why must I be punished for choosing to believe love can be a calming force?
11. Irina asks Bliss for a candle when she forgets Zack's birthday.
Where To Watch: Season 4, Episode 2
Why It's Burned Into My Brain: Irina really asked Bliss if she could copy her homework (if "the homework" was remembering their mutual crush's birthday and getting him something to celebrate). Truly, the audacity to ask another woman for something she put thought into so you could pass it off as your own! Not only is this villain behavior, it's, like...animated rogues gallery levels of goofy.
10.Andrew puts tear drops in his eyes to cry on camera.
Where To Watch: Season 3, Episode 3
Why It's Burned Into My Brain: SIR. YOU PAUSE YOUR EXIT CONFESSIONAL TO PUT FAKE TEARS IN YOUR EYES SO YOU LOOK HEARTBROKEN...AND NETFLIX EXPOSES YOU! I'M!!!!!!!!!!!! This is a villain turn from both Andrew and Netflix, and I love every second of it.
9.Damian rejects Giannina at the altar, and she runs away — only to fall in the mud.
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Where To Watch: Season 1, Episode 10
Why It's Burned Into My Brain: After all their ups and downs, Gigi and Damian finally make it to the altar, but while Gigi says an emphatic "Yes," Damian rejects her in front of all her family and friends. It's honestly gut-wrenching, and no one deserves this. Cut to Gigi going full runaway bride and sprinting out of the wedding venue with the cameras and her mom running after her. In this mess, she slips and falls, only to get up and find her wedding dress covered in mud. Can you imagine a more shit cherry on an internationally-televised garbage sundae?
8.Jackie ditches her wedding dress fitting to go on a date with Josh.
Where To Watch: Season 4, Episode 9
Why It's Burned Into My Brain: Jackie and Marshall are another couple that are just fundamentally incompatible, but in some of the coldest editing I've ever seen, Marshall discovers his relationship is over through a wild game of telephone when Brett comes over to tell him that Jackie never showed up to the brides' dress fitting. THEN, we cut to Jackie on a date with Josh — a man who was so drunk while professing his love to her at a party, he couldn't string an entire sentence together. Marshall, Jackie...you both can do better.
7.Shake says being with Deepti is like "being with his aunt."
Where To Watch: Season 2, Episode 4
Why It's Burned Into My Brain: Ugh, Shake. He is every stereotype of a shitty first-born Indian son rolled into one. A true L for my people. Red Flag #1: He asked women how much they weighed in the pods. On a show about making non-physical connections. Red Flag #2: When he and his wonderful fiancée Deepti meet in person for the first time post-engagement, he whispers that he's gonna get her pregnant. Red Flag #3: After being all over her during vacay and reassuring her insecurities about her body, he immediately tells Jarrett at the party that he's not attracted to her, and that being with her is like BEING WITH HIS AUNT!!! Never in my life have I been more offended for a woman on a reality dating show. Never in my life have I been more offended for an auntie.
6.Carlton throws Diamond's engagement ring into the pool.
Where To Watch: Season 1, Episode 4
Why It's Burned Into My Brain: Everyone's the asshole here. Carlton reveals to Diamond after they've gotten engaged and gone on vacay to Mexico that he's bisexual. Diamond's upset that he wasn't honest with her from the jump. Carlton accuses Diamond of being a homophobe, Diamond accuses Carlton of not caring about her perspective and not listening to her. The whole thing ends with Diamond taking off her ring and Carlton throwing it into the hotel pool. He then insults her wig (!!!) as she storms off. This relationship was doomed from the start 'cause neither of them were ready for this experiment, BUT the moment Carlton threw the ring was when I knew they'd be the villain in each other's story forever. Also, it brings me immense joy that the Netflix producers probably made Carlton get in the pool and fish the ring out afterwards because he regifted it to her at the reunion.
5.The entire cast telling Shake to fuck off at the reunion.
Where To Watch: Season 2, Episode 11
Why It's Burned Into My Brain: I thought nothing would top how satisfying it was to watch Deepti reject Shake at the altar, but Love Is Blind proved me wrong. For once, the villain of the season got what he deserved when everyone piled on to Shake's increasingly edgelord comments during the reunion. When Shayne of all people is telling you to shut up, your time is over. The delicious cherry on top? Deepti and Kyle (Shaina's ex) debuted their (brief) relationship during this episode.
4.Giannina tells Damian he's bad at sex.
Where To Watch: Season 1, Episode 7
Why It's Burned Into My Brain: Every time Giannina opened her mouth, shots were fired, but nothing was as brutal as the infamous bad sex convo of Season 1. After moving in together, Gigi and Damian were having a bunch of communication issues and ended up talking to each other from separate rooms to evoke the feeling of honesty in the pods. Well...it worked, but not the way Damian thought it would. Gigi brings up the fact that when Damian says sex with her is the best sex of his life, she never says it back. The look on this man's face when he hears that and realizes this moment will be google-able for the rest of his life: 💀 — yet another reason you couldn't pay me to be on a reality dating show.
3.SK's mom mouthing "I do" after Raven says yes to SK and SK pauses.
Where To Watch: Season 3, Episode 10
Why It's Burned Into My Brain: This. Is. Pure. Agony. Raven and SK were basically one of the few Love Is Blind couples that I really thought were going to make it. But after Raven tearfully, joyfully says "Yes" at the altar, SK takes a giant pause. You can see it's all about to crash, but SK's sweet, beautiful mom who welcomed Raven into their family starts mouthing the words, "I do," as if SK just simply forgot his line. IDK why, but this is absolutely gut-wrenching to me. It's like she thinks she can keep her son from fucking up by just believing with all her might, kinda like the Lost Boys have to believe in Tinkerbell or else she dies. Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE was crushed when SK said no, but it does lead to another, significantly more wholesome moment when SK's mom checks in on a devastated Raven after the wedding is called off. SK's mom is the real MVP of the season.
2.Jessica lets her dog drink her wine while Mark tries to convince her that he's not comparing her to his mom.
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Where To Watch: Season 1, Episode 6
Why It's Burned Into My Brain: Jessica and Mark: The age gap heard around the world. If you're wondering what this 34-year-old had in common with a 24-year-old, the answer is nothing. Jessica made that crystal clear when she decided she'd rather let her dog lick wine out of her own glass, and then IMMEDIATELY DRINK OUT OF IT, rather than listen to Mark's impassioned pleas. Mark desperately tried to convince her that he isn't just attracted to her because she reminds him of his mom, while the camera zooms in on Jessica's dog taking an Olivia Pope-sized slurp from an Olivia Pope-sized glass. The way Jessica whispers, "She loves wine," is something I will never be able to unhear. Tell me this doesn't scream I've given up on life, may the earth open up and swallow me whole!
1. Any time someone decided to serenade their someone special on this show.
@smiles_foryourhealth Anyone else’s eyes roll completely to the back of their head when he sings? And her fake crying? #bruh #greenscreenvideo #loveisblindnetflix #loveisblindseason2 #loveisblind #awkward #giveitup #salandmallory
♬ original sound - TheBlancoFamily
Where To Watch: IN EVERY CURSED SEASON
Why It's Burned Into My Brain: I cannot. Being sung to in public is my absolute nightmare. If I enjoyed this type of activity, then I would just buy tickets to musicals and call it a day. If it floats your boat, I'm happy for you — but let's be honest, even the most romantic of romantics among us would not be able to sit through a Love Is Blind serenade supercut without cringing.
