PSA: It’s Time to Book Your Dream Maldives Vacay
If two years at home has taught me anything about travel, it’s this: When you get an opportunity to book your dream vacation, you gotta take it. With this ~go big or go home~ mentality, I decided to finally (finally!) plan my dream holiday. First up on the good ol’ vision board: overwater villas, bikinis, bucket hats, and a total well-being reset.
On Instagram, I discovered Patina Maldives, Fari Islands in the Maldives and decided to reach out after realizing that the hotel checked all the boxes I was manifesting for this next-level vacay. It was also quickly becoming a celeb hot spot (I may or may not have overlapped with an über-private, tattooed A-list rapper 😏). Outside of the expected paradisiacal scenery and VIP clientele, the property seemed to emphasize art, nutrition, and pure bliss above everything else. Ultimately, I wanted to set off somewhere far-flung where I could get back to feeling like my pre-pandemic self. Sure, it sounds dramatic to head halfway around the world to reconnect with the person in the mirror, but when the opportunity to visit this property came up, I couldn’t say no.
(JSYK: The author and her boyfriend received a free stay, meals, and activities at Patina Maldives in exchange for reviewing it.)
How You’re Getting There
I’m not gonna to lie to you, the journey to the Maldives is hella LONG. Having survived the voyage, I recommend spending at least five nights there once you finally arrive to make the time fully worth it. Turkish Airlines was generous enough to fly me round trip, and between the concise route and comfy cabin, this is the best airline option for getting to paradise. On the way there, the trip consisted of an eight-hour flight to Istanbul, where I stayed for two days, and then another eight-hour flight to Malé (the capital of the Maldives).
On the way back, the flight was a total of 10 hours, but I broke it up with a 3-hour layover in Istanbul, which, trust me, is one of the shortest options. Since Turkish Airlines treated me to business class on the flight, I had access to the sickest airport lounge ever. TBH, it’s on par with a Manhattan penthouse, complete with marble showers, sleeping areas, a video game room, and Turkish delicacies.
Essentials for a Comfy Flight
Where You’re Staying
Call me superficial, but as a person in a visual field, aesthetic and use of design is a priority when I book a hotel. If it doesn’t delight my eyeballs, then I don’t want it.
Art and design are foundational to Patina Maldives, Fari Islands (to make it easy, I’ll just refer to it as Patina from now on). Around the resort, the transition from inside to outside was always subtle: Continuous flooring is used to seamlessly blend indoors and out, while all of the tuck doors slid open to create an open-air space. Natural materials, like wood, straw, and stone, are left raw to create more of a laid-back luxe vibe.
In our villa, several of the furniture pieces were custom-designed, like Danish-style chairs with light wood and a woven seat, which blended well with a charcoal-color linen sofa. Darker linens and rich textures gave off a moody, cool vibe inside the villas, which contrasts to the typical white and bright tropical colors of many other local beach resorts.
And then there’s the out-of-this-world artwork. If you keep up with celeb home tours like I do, you’ll be familiar with the artist James Turrell. Basically, each Kardashian and NBA player has one of his works in their houses, and he has installations all around the world. He’s known for his play with light and color as well as his all-encompassing visual experiences.
When the owners of Patina were putting together design plans, they commissioned a light-up pavilion by Turrell. At any other of his known installations, timed tickets are required and crowds are expected. But at Patina, I could pop in after every meal and enjoy the space alone. I would often spend a few minutes there and watch the color of the sky change through the hole in the ceiling. The space served as an excuse to take a breath, plus it’s a fantastic photo op.
How You’re Chilling
Patina’s well-being philosophy can be summed up in one word: FLOW. It encompassed the vibe around the island—for me, it felt like my senses were all seemingly at ease, my body was nourished and healthy, and I had a general sense of peace and joy. I slept like a baby in our California king bed and silky sheets, while our sunrise-facing villa made waking up early actually feel doable.
Flow is also the name of Patina’s spa. Along with flotation tanks, pools, and saunas, Flow has a room dedicated to the practice of Watsu. Watsu is a form of bodywork therapy that’s done in a four-foot-deep pool. After some hyping up from the spa staff, I decided to try a session with a practitioner named Mo (“Flow with Mo” was too catchy to pass up, after all).
In my most secure swimsuit, I entered the serene treatment room, which was flooded with tons of natural light. There was a single four-foot-deep pool that was about the size of my Manhattan living room (small but spacious enough to spread out). Once I was ready, I slipped into the bath-temperature water, where Mo fitted me with ankle floaties and a nose plug. He gave me short instructions on when to breathe, because I would be dunked and held under for a few seconds, and to keep my eyes closed if possible. Other than that, it was best to let go of bodily tension and completely surrender to the movement (a totally easy thing for this Aries).
After the explanation of what was to come, I began floating on my back while Mo cradled my shoulders. He pulled me through the water like seaweed, dunked my head, and flipped me through somersaults. He held me under my shoulder and knee and I glided like a dancer. As I focused on the sensation of my face cutting through water and releasing tension from my limbs, letting go of control was easy. It was wild because I felt like a baby in a womb and simultaneously my middle school self doing spins in Lake Michigan. I even found myself smiling at the childlike joy bubbling up in my chest.
Our routine of expanding and contracting like this lasted for a full hour and ended with Mo setting me on the pool steps, telling me to open my eyes, and welcoming me back to the real world. As I blinked and took in the sunshine, I noticed that my senses felt sharper. I was relaxed and limber, both mentally and physically. Doing the treatment on my second day at Patina put me in the perfect mindset to fully enjoy the rest of my time there.
The Best ’Kinis
What Else You’re Doing
Beyond the spa, my boyfriend and I spent most of our time on our villa deck and at the nearby pools and beach. Since our overwater villa sat above a reef, access to creature-spotting was prime, especially during our daily (yep, you read that right) snorkel excursions. After a salty dip, I would rinse off in our private pool, then sun-dry on the water’s edge. Almost every night, I would cap off the evening in the outdoor bathtub while looking up at the stars. Patina provided all the necessary bath essentials, like salts and scrubs, and occasionally I combined this ritual with a glass of bubbly, making it the most memorable multisensory bathing experience of my life thus far.
Dry Land Necessities
What You’re Eating
Sustainability is a focus for every resort in Maldives, not just out of principle but also out of logistics. Everything is imported, and any trash that is created on the islands must be shipped away. I didn’t see any single-use plastics during my stay—any packaging used was compostable, and Patina grows its produce locally whenever possible.
Out of all the culinary experiences around the island, experiencing Patina’s breakfast spread every morning was the absolute best. The food was split into three buffets: one with Asian bites (dumplings, baos, curry), a pastry room with warm dishes like oats, and an area that I can only describe as a fruit palace. Each day, a new kind of exotic fruit appeared that left me wondering how the hell it should be consumed (think dragon fruit and green watermelon).
Every morning, I had no fewer than three beverages in front of me at all times before breakfast closed at 11 a.m. Over coffee, I even overheard another couple admit that they extended their stay by an additional two nights solely because of the breakfast spread. It’s *that* good.
Whenever I travel somewhere new, I always take a cooking class. IMO, it’s the perfect way to learn about the location’s history, culture, and land. Patina offered us the opportunity to step behind its kitchen counter and create some Maldivian dishes with the help of a chef. As a Seamless devotee, I honestly impressed myself with my first-ever attempt at a simple tuna salad, reef fish curry, and a fried banana and coconut ice cream dessert.
After we prepared our food, we walked out to the beach, where our Patina friends had set up a special table for us on the shore in the sunshine. The mixologist took our drink order, and I’m pretty sure I made my way through every flavor of marg that they serve (mango, papaya, and pomegranate included).
The resort’s culinary experiences are mostly plant-based for nutrition and sustainability purposes. Its flagship restaurant, Roots, features an entire menu that’s void of meat and dairy.
On a few occasions, I’ve been asked if the trek to the Maldives is worth the PTO. And honestly? The answer is yes, without hesitation. Especially if you treat yourself to a stay at Patina.
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