The Poster for Colton Underwood's Season of The Bachelor Is Really…Something
Breaking news: Did you know Colton Underwood, the next Bachelor, is a virgin? I kid—there's no way you could forget. Remember how his storylines on The Bachelorette and Bachelor in Paradise unfolded earlier this year? The shows constantly weaved in the fact that this hunky 26-year-old former football player was somehow still a virgin. He actually cried on one of the live specials as he recalled how he frequently lied about his sex life to his teammates, as if that was supposed to make us feel…sorry for him, I guess?
No shade to Colton's tears—I just think his virginity is a weird quality to harp on because, truth is, it's not a big deal. Some people are virgins, and some people aren't. Just like some people pronounce caramel "care-a-mell" and others say "car-mul." Both are fine, valid options. The same goes for your sex life. Colton is a virgin, not a serial killer.
And yet the reality series keeps playing the V-card for all it's worth. Exhibit A: The first promotional poster for Colton's season of The Bachelor, which is pretty standard minus one hilarious detail. Take a look at it for yourself, below:
See what I'm talking about? Colton's tagline is the not-at-all-subtle, "What does he have to lose?" Get it? Because he's a virgin? And he has to lose his virginity?
Here's a new Bachelor drinking game for Colton's season: Take a sip any time someone says the word "virgin." Maybe play with soda, though, because at this rate it'll be 500 times per episode—and it's never a good idea to go that hard on a Monday.
The (Virgin) Bachelor premieres January 7 at 8:00 P.M. ET on ABC.
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