If You’re Polyamorous, You Need To Download These Dating Apps
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If you've dipped your toe into the modern dating pool at all, you're probably familiar with the many, many dating apps out there. Odds are, you've tried them all, from Hinge to Bumble to Tinder. But it can also be hard to find people who want the same things you do—and if you're polyamorous, it might be even more difficult to navigate these platforms.
Enter: dating apps specifically designed for those seeking polyamorous connections. Maybe you've only heard of Hinge, Bumble, and the like, but there's actually a handful of platforms that were created with poly folks and their specific dating app needs in mind.
Take Feeld, for instance: this kink-friendly, polyamorous app lets you pair your profile with your partners' pages, in case you're looking to add a third or fourth. There's also #Open, in which you can identify your desires (and dealbreakers) through specific hashtags (think: #triads, or kinks like #spanking).
With the polyamorous community's specific needs in mind, Women's Health rounded up some of the best dating apps for poly and poly-curious daters—along with the best ways to use traditionally monogamous apps if you're non-monogamous. What's paramount, ultimately, is that you're being honest with your current partner(s) and matches, says Gigi Engle, a certified sex coach, sexologist, and author of All the F*cking Mistakes: A Guide to Sex, Love, and Life.
So, without further ado, these are the absolute best polyamory dating apps to meet new partners, hookups, and even friends, according to experts.
Meet the experts:
Gigi Engle is a certified sex coach, sexologist, and author of All The F*cking Mistakes: A Guide to Sex, Love, and Life.
Janet Brito, PhD is a clinical psychologist and certified sex therapist based in Hawaii.
Kaylee Friedman, LPC is an L.A.-based certified sex therapist and life coach.
1. "Traditional" Apps Like Hinge, Bumble, Tinder, etc.
Best App If You Want Something Straightforward
Cost: Varied, but all three have free options
If you’re planning to use one of the more traditionally "monogamous" apps like Hinge or Bumble, there are a few helpful notes for your profile to signify that you’re looking for more than one partner. First, make sure you state that you’re ethically non-monogamous (ENM) in your profile, says Janet Brito, PhD, a clinical psychologist and certified sex therapist based in Hawaii. And if you want to match specifically with other polyamorous individuals, you can also write that you’re seeking "like-minded folks."
Looking to add a third party to your current duo? Just make that clear, and ensure that both you and your current partner have account access, Engle explains. It may help to even set boundaries with that partner so that you’re using it together rather than separately. "Total transparency is needed to make this work," Engle says. "Don't be cagey or coy, because that is coming from a place of dishonesty, which is not a good place to start." Noted!
A subscription version of any of these apps will you get you features such as extra roses or likes to send to potential matches, access to all the profiles who've swiped right on you, unique preferences, and profile boosting options.
2. Feeld
Best App For Polyamorous Daters
Cost: Free; Majestic mode for $19.99
PSA: Feeld is one of the best apps out there for poly folks, according to Engle. "People have better overall experiences with this app, as it's meant for open relationships and those looking to explore alternative-style sex, such as kinks," Engle says.
In short, Feeld encourages you to be yourself on the platform, Brito adds, including your desire to see several people. If you purchase Majestic mode, you'll be able to see everyone who likes you, send one ping a day, uplift your profile to get more exposure, add private photos, and go on incognito mode so you other users won't see your profile unless you swipe on them first.
3. #Open
Best App For Finding Polyamorous Friends
Cost: Free; membership for $9.99
Ever heard of #Open? "It’s an app built on the concept of non-monogamous dating," says Engle.
You heard that right: This app is literally designed for polyamorous, ENM, and open people. They have a breadth of virtual and IRL community events, too, so you can get a jump start on meeting your next crush ASAP, all while being surrounded by like-minded people.
The paid version of this app lets you to see who likes you first, gives you 15 Sparks a month to send to the ones who really catch your eye, and allows you to swipe using power grid access, where you can view multiple likes at a time.
4. Ashley Madison
Best App For Discreet Dating
Cost: Free; Basic 100 credits for $59, Classic 500 credits for $169, Elite 1,000 credits for $289
You’ve probably heard of Ashley Madison, the website known for affairs and discreet dating. "It’s popular, but controversial," says Brito. "Lots of folks use it."
Now in app format too, the site claims that the service is legit for everyone, including polyamorous individuals specifically, Brito notes. The main tenet is that Ashley Madison is a judgment-free zone, which means it’s also a place where poly people can explore their sexuality and date, too.
While women can use the app for free, men are allowed one free message before having to select a payment plan. Each action requires a certain amount of credits, so men may need to restock. An Elite plan gets you Ashley Madison Premium, which will give you one day of free chat and priority status.
5. BiCupid
Best App For Bisexual, Polyamorous Daters
Cost: Free; membership for $33.99
"This app caters to bisexual folks seeking polyamory," Brito explains. In short, BiCupid is for everyone who’s into a wide range of relationship styles. Whether you’re looking to add a third to your current relationship, interested in meeting more single polyamorous people, or just looking to chat with other bi folks, you can do that on BiCupid. With a purchased membership you can search for profiles, share extra photos, and chat with other subscribed users too.
6. OkCupid
Best App For Finding Your Perfect Match(es)
Cost: Free; Basic for $4.95, Premium for $24.90
No, OkCupid isn’t specifically known for its polyamorous community, but it actually does have features that allow you to express your polyamorous identity, says Brito. This means that you can search and match with other polyamorous people on the app seeking both short-term connections and longer-term relationships in your area.
On the Basic plan, you can send unlimited likes, set unique preferences, and remove ads. If you decide to invest in Premium, you can view everyone who has liked your profile, send three SuperLikes per week, and see other users' answers to questions you haven't answered yet.
7. Down
Best App For Casual Sex
Cost: Free; VIP for $19.99
Up for hookups, specifically? Down is the app for you, says Brito. It allows you to select whether you’d specifically like to go on a date or just ~hook up~ with a certain person. If you’re poly, this means that you have the opportunity to designate your desired romantic/sexual experience from the get-go.
If you become a VIP, the app promises on ten times more matches, the ability to view people out of your local area, the chance to see who's liked your profile first, and an option to hide your profile from Facebook friends.
8. MoreThanOne
Best App For Meeting Couples
Cost: Free
MoreThanOne is designed specifically for polyamorous folks. The app is for both single polyamorous people as well as for open, ethical, non-monogamous relationships. And, yes, according to the app, it’s welcoming of all genders, sexualities, and identities, in case you’re not about putting labels on any of your own identities.
9. PolyFinda
Best App For Finding *Lots* Of Like-Minded People
Cost: Free; membership for $9.99
Another app built to fill a gap in the polyamorous dating space, PolyFinda lets you navigate dating the way you want. It was made for all genders and preferences by members of the polyamorous community, and you’re encouraged to put all of your information out there: State whether you’re in a pair and looking to add more members to your relationship, any characteristics you want in your partner(s), or whether or not you’re in the mood for something casual.
You'll start off with 200 credits that will need to be restored through a purchase. However, a membership will auto-renew your credits monthly.
10. Lex
Best App For Finding A Queer, Polyamorous Community
Cost: Free
Lex is a dating and community-building app catered to the LGBTQ+ community. It allows you to create your profile and fill out prompts that serve as icebreakers. The only difference: there's no swiping. Instead, you can reply to posts, create a personal ad, join groups, and DM other users. If you met someone IRL but didn't get their info, Lex has a "missed connections" tab that lets you share descriptions of people in hopes that they'll see it.
"The queer community tends to be more polyamorous, so it's definitely a good resource for connecting with people who engage in more alternative relationship styles," says Kaylee Friedman, LPC, a certified sex therapist and life coach in Los Angeles.
11. Kik
Best App For Platonic Polyamorous Connections
Cost: Free
You might remember this chatting platform from your high school days, but it still has a lot to offer poly adults, too. It still functions as a messaging app, but Kik now has groups you can find using hashtags. "When you're part of a relationship style minority, it's vital not just to date within that community but to build connection and friendship within that community because it can feel really isolating," says Friedman. She notes that the setup on Kik can make it easy to transition from group talks to one-on-one conversations without all the pressure.
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