Lori Harvey says she is entering her 'selfish' era: 'It's always been about me attached to something or someone'

Lori Harvey says she is ready to be selfish. (Photo by Rodin Eckenroth/Getty Images)
Lori Harvey says she is ready to be selfish. (Photo by Rodin Eckenroth/Getty Images)

At 25, Lori Harvey has mastered the art of mystery, quickly climbing the ranks as one of the internet's hottest "It" girls.

But in an interview with Essence, the January/February cover star shared how that same elusiveness has left her subject to endless speculation and baseless discourse, exposing the double-edged sword of mystique.

"Because I've been so quiet this whole time, the internet has created narratives for me," she said.

Harvey is no stranger to causing a stir with her personal life. This is due in large part to her dating history, which includes Hollywood heartthrob Michael B. Jordan. Most recently, she's been linked to Snowfall star Damson Idris.

But it's not just the notable faces Harvey is associated with that make her one of Twitter's favorite topics. Her knack for keeping quiet even when she is trending has made her irresistible to both fans and critics.

"People are just taking whatever bits of gossip and rumors that they have, and then creating that as a truth. In reality, the majority of the time it's so far from the truth so it can be tough," Harvey said.

But as the daughter of The Original Kings of Comedy legend Steve Harvey and fashionista Majorie Harvey, she is in no shortage of self-affirming advice, sharing a mantra from her mom that helps her tune out the noise.

"For those who know and love you, no answer is needed. But for those who don't, no answer will do," Harvey shared. "That's where the strong sense of self comes into play. Just understanding and really knowing who I am, and not letting the outside opinions or noise affect me internally."

Even though rumors of her romantic happenings may be of interest to the general public, Harvey is proudly entering her "selfish" era. And who she is dating, loving or leaving is the least interesting thing about her.

"I feel like it's always been about me attached to something or someone," she said. "This time, it's about me. Self-love, self-care, self-reflection. I'm being a little selfish right now. It's my time."

Still, Harvey cannot ignore the never-ending stream of opinions circulating about some of the most intimate aspects of her life, acknowledging it does get to her.

"It can be tough at times, especially because I'm a super-private person," she said.

But when it comes to critiques of her choice of men and the length of her relationships, Harvey doesn't really care.

"I think a lot of times, people are projecting," she said, noting that many people just aren't used to seeing a woman date on her own terms. "Typically, what I have found is when it's guys who feel that way, it's because they know that they can't meet you at your standards. Which is OK, too. Everything ain't for everybody."

Now just shy of 26, Harvey has spent the majority of her adult life in the public eye, an admittedly trying feat. And while she is frequently touted as an "icon" of 21st-century dating for young Black women, she maintains she is still just a 20-something who is learning.

"What I would love for people to know is that I am a young woman just trying to figure it out — but I'm trying to figure it out in the public eye," Harvey said. "That magnifies everything. It magnifies your mistakes. It magnifies the ups and downs of just navigating your life and figuring it out for yourself."

She also set the record straight that while she will always put herself first, she is not in the business of looking down on others.

"It's not about being arrogant or about feeling like I'm too good, or too this or too that. I know my worth, and I know my value. I'm not going to compromise that, or settle or accept anything less than what I know I deserve," she said.

Making sure self-love precedes any external validators is the SKN by LH founder's current M.O., and she advises others to adopt a similar mantra.

"Put yourself first. Love yourself. Put yourself on the highest pedestal, and don't ever come down," she said.

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