We've pretty much had it with our own country. Let's just pretend that the United States is still a wee upstart colony of the British Empire, shall we? La la la we can't hear you, Trump. La la la we belong to the Queen.
OK, who are we kidding? Our hearts totally belong to the Queen's ginger grandson, Prince Harry, who was spotted play-boxing with a toddler with the same name.
This is what we needed to see: nice humans doing good things for the world and hanging with happy toddlers and cute dogs.
Prince Harry was on hand earlier today at the British team trials in Bath, England, for his brainchild, The Invictus Games, taking place this September in Toronto. The Paralympic-style games launched in London and are open to wounded, sick and injured serving and former members of the armed forces. Three hundred people were on hand at the University of Bath to try out for this year's games.
Dan Phillips — who injured his spinal cord in Afghanistan and was medically discharged from his regiment — was one of the 300 and is hoping to take part in archery and shot put events. He was, in his own words, "chuffed to bits" to introduce his son, Harry, to the prince. ("Chuffed to bits" = best phrase ever. Please tell us how to apply for British citizenship immediately.)
“Big Harry was teaching little Harry to box,” Phillips said. “They were high-fiving and boxing... [and] we call our son our Prince Harry!”
According to his little namesake, Harry Phillips, the shorter Harry won the match. When the toddler was asked who'd won, he told reporters, "Me!" We die. We have melted of cuteness. We had a good life. No regrets.
Our favorite ginger prince thanked all the competitors, saying, "This is the Invictus family. Make the most of it, enjoy it. I’d like to see you all there, but the reality is we only have 90 places. But what I do hope is your journey up to this point has been recovery no matter what — and on top of recovery you’re here making friends and sharing stories and experiences you’ll never forget.”
If that still doesn't melt your ice-cold monarchy-rejecting heart, try this on for size: Prince Harry also spent time with former marine and archery competitor Jon Flint and his assistance dog, a black Labrador named Jester. (A court jester! How great is that?)
The dog barked and did a happy dance when Prince Harry greeted him. Good dog, Jester! We would have done the exact same thing. And maybe peed submissively. Just a little.
Seriously, when is Prince Harry going to give us some royal ginger babies? Just marry Meghan Markle and get on it, Harry. We need more adorable royals in our miserable, bad-news-bloated American lives, please.