Stormy Daniels is back in the news today after her millennial pink suit moment at Michael Cohen’s courthouse appearance yesterday. This time she’s sharing a sketch of the man she alleges intimidated her in a parking lot in 2011, and Twitter soon noticed that he looks a lot like a teen heartthrob. The sketch that Daniels and her lawyer Michael Avenatti showed on The View has a strong jawline; is described as 5 feet 9 to 6 feet tall and “lean but ‘fit’ ” by the sketch artist Lois Gibson; and looks generally like the hot jock you would pine for in a teen drama of the early aughts. Though Daniels reiterated her account from 60 Minutes (that the man threatened her, while telling her obliquely to drop the story of her affair with Donald Trump that she had just given to In Touch) and also announced a $100,000 reward to identify him, the Internet was more concerned with figuring out whether he looked more like Luke from The O.C., Chad Michael Murray, or a young Tom Brady.
Chad Michael Murray
Luke from The O.C.
Smith Jerrod from Sex and the City
Jon Bon Jovi
Matt Damon from Team America