My fiancée’s bridesmaid accused me of something horrific — I want her kicked out of the wedding party

A groom-to-be is livid over a comment his wife's friend made.
A groom-to-be is livid over a comment his wife's friend made.

He’s feeling very doom and groom.

A groom-to-be chose to speak now rather than forever hold his peace about his fiancée’s bridesmaid who he believes did him wrong.

Posting in the Reddit forum r/AmItheasshole a day ago, the man who goes by the name LlamaThrustUlti, said he wants to fire one of his fiancee’s bridesmaids or uninvite her to the wedding after she made an unsavory drunken comment about one of his friends. Now Redditors are divided over whether he’s right to be mad or if he’s overreacting — or worse.

The man explained that his friend from college had been staying with them for five months after a nasty breakup. He claimed she had a miscarriage with her ex, found out that he had been having an emotional affair with a coworker and also had a big fight with her family.

A groom-to-be is livid over a comment his wife’s friend made. Getty Images/iStockphoto
A groom-to-be is livid over a comment his wife’s friend made. Getty Images/iStockphoto

“Obviously I moved her into my place ASAP,” he explained.

The drama occurred when his fiancee had some of her bridesmaids over for drinks and his college friend joined them. He said all of the ladies got drunk, including his fiancee whom he carried upstairs to her bed after she fell asleep. His college friend also got drunk to the point of getting sick and he said he spent 20 minutes with her in the bathroom as she was throwing up. That’s when he heard the comment that made his blood boil.

He overheard one of his fiancee’s friends saying he was only helping his college friend because he wanted to “get in her pants.”

“The other girls around her immediately told her off (they’re all aware of my friend’s situation) and I just stood obstructed on the stairway trembling in anger,” he said.

He said he hasn’t told his fiancee about what happened yet but that he’s planning to rescind her friend’s bridesmaid status.

The man said he wanted his bride-to-be to fire her bridesmaid. Getty Images/iStockphoto
The man said he wanted his bride-to-be to fire her bridesmaid. Getty Images/iStockphoto

He assured Redditors that he has a “deeply PLATONIC relationship with his friend.” He also said he’s offended someone would suspect him of taking advantage of someone in a drunken state.

Some commenters agreed that he was right to be angry and supported his decision.

“I don’t think I would want someone who thinks so poorly of me to be in such a place of honor at my wedding either,” one person wrote.

“The saying, I believe, is ‘many a true word is spoken in jest.’ That sentiment didn’t come out of nowhere. Jokes don’t come out of nowhere. How sad for her to think so poorly of (from what I can tell) a great guy. No reason for you to keep her and her horrible inferences of her character around though,“ another said.

The man said his friend from college has been staying with him for five months and that they are strictly platonic. Some Redditors said his angry reaction to the bridesmaid’s comment was a red flag. Getty Images
The man said his friend from college has been staying with him for five months and that they are strictly platonic. Some Redditors said his angry reaction to the bridesmaid’s comment was a red flag. Getty Images

“If my partner, regardless of gender, helped someone really drunk be sick – as well as offering to drive all of my friends home, so everyone could enjoy themselves, without worrying about how they’re getting home – I would feel incredibly lucky to be with such a kind person,” a third chimed in.

Several other commenters thought that the poster was overreacting and others suspected there could be some validity to his fiancee’s friend’s joke.

“I understand being angry, but demanding your wife essentially remove her as a friend over something that could have been just a sh–ty out-of-place comment that wasn’t meant to be taken this seriously could be a bit much,” someone posted.

The man said he’s yet to tell his fiancee about what happened. Getty Images
The man said he’s yet to tell his fiancee about what happened. Getty Images

“We don’t know how she said it, or what she did after, so that’s up to you. But idk, I think you could be overreacting a bit,” their post continued.

“NTA (it’s your wedding invite whoever you want), but if you remove her over this it’ll lend a lot more credibility to her drunk thoughts since why else would you get so defensive over a silly comment that could have been laughed off,” another added.

“This is a major overreaction to a thoughtless, likely drunken comment…Your intense reaction seems to be disproportionate, so it may be that the dart struck closer to home than you’d like. I’m not saying you do want to get in her pants, but maybe you feel a bit guilty about your closeness because society tells you that you can’t have a girlfriend without it being sexual,” said a third.