Elderly Brits are facing a ‘loneliness epidemic’ this Christmas: How can you help?

The Christmas season is often thought of as a joyful time of the year, filled with loved ones, laughter and cheer. That’s what it should be – but for millions of people in the UK who struggle with loneliness and feeling isolated, Christmas is the opposite of a jolly good time.

While loneliness has been a worrying social issue for a long time, the effects of isolation and avoiding other people during the Covid pandemic has heightened the issue; so much so that the World Health Organisation declared it to be a pressing global health threat.

In the UK, analysis of data from the Office for National Statistics (ONS) by the Campaign to End Loneliness found that, since 2020, the prevalence of chronic loneliness rose from 6% (3.24 million people) to 7.1% (3.83 million people). This indicates that, since the first year of the Covid pandemic, the number of people who often or always feel lonely has risen by more than half a million.

The mental and physical impact of loneliness is cause for concern. Being lonely is associated with increased risk of coronary heart disease and stroke, and is a risk factor for depression. The health risks of loneliness have been compared to smoking up to 15 cigarettes a day.

Feelings of loneliness and isolation can become even more magnified over the festive period – as shown by a recent report by Age UK, which revealed that more than two million older people wish they had someone to spend time with at Christmas.

To understand why loneliness has become such problem in the UK and throughout the world, we spoke to Ruth Lowe, Age UK’s head of loneliness services, and asked her what Britons can do to help make others feel less isolated during Christmas and beyond.

Walking in a lonely wonderland

Age UK’s research, which was released earlier this month as part of its Christmas campaign, also found that 1.6 million older people find Christmas day to be the hardest day of the year, for all kinds of reasons.

Around a third of those surveyed said the festive season brings up difficult memories of a loved one who has passed away. This year, the cost of living crisis is also driving up feelings of loneliness as more than a million people aged over 65 said financial constraints will isolate them this Christmas more than ever before.

Lowe explains that loneliness is often driven by circumstance and there are certain factors and events that increase the risk of someone being lonely. "For older people, we know they’re much more likely to be alone if they’re in poor health, if they’ve got financial difficulties, or live alone, of course," she says.

"Feelings of loneliness are also often triggered by big life changes, such as losing a partner or retiring from work. So older people are a group who are very much at risk of it – but there’s still a lot of stigma around loneliness for older people."

Christmas also brings a lot of messages about being together with family and friends – TV specials, Christmas adverts, radio shows and nearly every form of media "bombards" people with this type of sentiment, which can hit people who are lonely hard.

"The reality is that for many older people, they’ll be spending most of the Christmas period or all of it alone and it can trigger lots of memories, maybe of people they’ve lost and past Christmases they have enjoyed, and it can bring home what they had before and what they don’t have now."

It’s also a time of the year when lots of services and shops close down, further isolating people who don’t get much social interaction elsewhere. Age UK provides national services on Christmas day, such as their 24-hour helpline, so that people on their own have the opportunity to hear someone else’s voice.

"Often, that will be the only person they’ll speak to all day," Lowe adds.

The signs of loneliness

The stigma around loneliness – which makes some people feel embarrassed about it or feel as though it is their own fault – can prevent people from speaking about their experience and seeking help.

This means that many of those suffering will often not actually admit they are feeling lonely, Lowe says. However, there are some indicators you can look out for to tell if someone you know is feeling lonely.

"One indicator could be that somebody’s mental and physical health is declining. The issue is that some people can get stuck in a vicious cycle; so when they’re chronically lonely, they can start to feel their physical and mental health deteriorate, which makes it harder to get about and form connections. Then they become more lonely. It can be quite difficult to pull them out of it."

Changes in health is one thing – but you should also listen closer to what people are saying, as it might be a hint that they are lonely. "Loneliness brings up lots of negative thoughts and feelings," Lowe continues. "So people might say things like, they feel there’s no point, they don’t know if they can go on.

"If people are expressing those kinds of doubts and hopelessness, that could be a sign that they’re chronically lonely. They may also become more likely to stop taking care of themselves or their home."

‘Loneliness is an epidemic’

Humans are hardwired to need social contact – without it, feeling lonely is a natural reaction. Having meaningful relationships and connections is essential to combating loneliness, and the more social interaction a person has, the less likely they are to be lonely.

But why do so many people have so little interaction with others? Lowe says there are a number of factors that have contributed to the problem of loneliness.

"For older people, I’d say in the last few years, they’ve been very much impacted by a lot of the cuts to public transport services, even things like benches being removed and public spaces being closed," Lowe says, agreeing that loneliness has become "an epidemic".

"All these little things make the world so much smaller for older people. It also makes things much more difficult if they’re struggling financially or have physical health impairments.

"Lockdown also had a huge impact on older people. They were told to stay inside and shield, a lot of older people still haven’t been able to move past that. A lot of people still have anxiety about going out and about, they really lost their confidence during that time."

Digital exclusion has also exacerbated the issue for older people, who are not as internet-savvy as the generations after them. A large proportion of older people aren’t online or don’t have access to the internet – which is a huge problem when more and more things are becoming online-only.

"Even when you go out to the shops, the cashiers are being replaced by computers. The cashier might be the only person an older person speak to all day, and even that’s been taken away," Lowe says.

"It feels sometimes that older people are being left behind in this changing world and they feel invisible, like they’re just not part of the world."

What can we do?

There are plenty of things you can do in your community to help reduce loneliness, Lowe says. The simplest of all is just to acknowledge and interact with someone who is on their own.

"Saying hello to someone when they’re out and about and spending a couple of minutes to have a chat with people in your community can make a really big difference. You could even send a Christmas card to your neighbour or ask them around for a cup of tea," she suggests.

"One of the things we would really encourage people to do is reach out to family, friends, neighbours, people you haven’t spoken to for a little while. Just having a phone call or checking in can make such a difference to a lonely older person."

Anyone who needs support, or who is worried about an older relative or friend, or wants to find out more about Age UK’s friendship services, can get in touch by calling Age UK Advice free of charge on 0800 169 6565 (8am-7pm), or visit ageuk.org.uk. Any older person looking for a cheerful chat can call Age UK’s Silver Line Helpline, day or night, on 0800 4 70 80 90.

Read more about loneliness and mental health:

• How to look after your mental health if you're spending Christmas alone (Yahoo Life UK, 5-min read)

• Andrea McLean opens up about midlife ‘loneliness’: How to help someone struggling (Yahoo Life UK, 5-min read)

• 'I retired from football at 25—I was lonely and isolated, my mental health was suffering' (Yahoo Life UK, 9-min