With Drew Lock Hurt, the Denver Broncos Need a Quarterback Bad. Hmmm, I Wonder Who They Should Sign?

Jay Connor
·4 mins read
A man wears a Colin Kaepernick jersey during the March on Washington at the Lincoln Memorial August 28, 2020 in Washington, DC.
A man wears a Colin Kaepernick jersey during the March on Washington at the Lincoln Memorial August 28, 2020 in Washington, DC.

In the NFL, having a quality quarterback is kind of a big deal if you want to win a Super Bowl.

My beloved Denver Broncos should know this better than anyone, considering we haven’t won jack shit since Peyton Manning retired in 2016—immediately after doing exactly that.

It’s been a tumultuous couple of years since, and 2020 was looking like one of our most promising seasons since BET’s Teen Summit got canceled. Then defensive stalwart Von Miller suffered a season-ending ankle injury in the final damn practice before the season, defensive back A.J. Bouye dislocated his shoulder, Pro Bowl running back Phillip Lindsay will miss up to four weeks with turf toe, Pro Bowl receiver tore his knee up and will miss the rest of the season aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand our promising quarterback, Drew Lock, will miss up to six weeks after injuring his shoulder on this terrible-ass play.

Translation: With only two weeks into the season, the Broncos are completely and utterly fucked.

Now, with a good enough quarterback, there would still be hope to salvage the season. But apparently, Broncos general manager and president of football operations, John Elway, would much rather pick the worst possible option available by signing scrap heap free agent Blake Bortles—who was last seen crawling out of a dumpster and brushing diaper debris off of himself.

From ESPN:

With starting quarterback Drew Lock expected to miss three to five weeks with a shoulder injury, the Denver Broncos have agreed to terms with Blake Bortles on a one-year deal, a source told ESPN’s Jeremy Fowler on Tuesday.

Bortles will start the mandated COVID-19 protocols, which will include multiple tests spread over four days.

Coach Vic Fangio on Monday said that the Broncos had brought in a quarterback and that the player wouldn’t be able to attend meetings or practice “until Friday or Saturday.”

Yes, it’s slim pickings for a free agent quarterback at this point in the season, but Bortles is about as good at football as Candace Owens is at quoting Black movies. His career 24-49 record aside, Bortles is the only quarterback since 2014 (!!!!!!!) to throw over 75 interceptions with a completion percentage below 60 percent. He puts the shit in shit, the trash in trash, and is completely undeserving of whatever birthday presents and Christmas cards you were considering sending his way.

You know who would’ve been a better option? Yao Ming. Hell, even Emmanuel Lewis. But all jokes aside, after the NFL spent months touting empty initiatives and kissing Colin Kaepernick’s ass—even going as far to use videos of him kneeling in their social justice campaigns—guess who still remains on the outside looking in at the league?

Yup. You guessed it: Colin Kaepernick.

NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell Sheds White Tears for Colin Kaepernick: 'I Wish We Had Listened Earlier'

And that’s not even to say that Kap could save the Broncos under these circumstances. But considering he’s easily the best quarterback available, and his agent can’t even get a phone call, further confirms reports of the NFL creating fake interest out of white guilt this summer.

Report: It Turns Out White Guilt Drove NFL to Entertain Colin Kaepernick's Return, Create 'Fake' Interest

I would expect nothing less from a league with “End Racism” stenciled on its endzones while only employing a grand total of three Black head coaches—the same number the league had when it adopted the Rooney Rule in the first place back in 2003.

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