Drew Barrymore Says the Term 'Self-Care' Makes Her Feel Like a Failure
As parents, we’ve all heard the saying that we need to put on our own oxygen masks first, before our children’s, as a metaphor for how we can only take care of our kids well if we first take care of ourselves. But when babies need to be fed, or toddlers need a boo-boo bandaged, or offspring of any age need attention, it’s almost impossible to say, “Sorry, kiddo, I’m doing self-care right now! Be with ya later!” And Drew Barrymore is right there with us.
“I, as a parent, resent the term self-care, because I’m like, really, when am I going to do that?” the actor, talk-show host, and entrepreneur told SheKnows. “And then I just feel like I screwed up before I even started it. Like I’m a failure at something.”
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“I haven’t worked out in like three months because my kids are in school and I’m drowning between work and that,” said Barrymore, who is raising 7-year-old Olive and 6-year-old Frankie, with ex-husband Will Kopelman. “You birth a child and you move into this neighborhood called Guilt City, and then you live there for the rest of your life.”
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Barrymore is one of the many celebrity moms we love for being open and honest about just how hard parenting is, even for someone with privilege and help. For single working moms, well, forget it!
But rather than the stereotypical candle-lit bubble baths, Barrymore has found a form of self-care that actually fits pretty easily into her life: Making her backyard into her sanctuary. Which is why she recently partnered with the new sustainable lawn-care brand instead.
“I was out on my lawn this weekend with my kids having an incredible weekend, feeling like we were the luckiest people in the world,” she said. “It’s not the spa candle moment we all kind of battle with. It’s a very meditative thing and there actually is full-circle-ness, in that you can grow things to eat or you can watch your kids play on the lawn you just planted. You can feel good about the way that you’ve gone about doing it. And yeah, I’m not going to be very good at going to get a massage. I will be better about working out in the lawn and the garden.”
If gardening isn’t your thing, or you don’t have a backyard of your own, don’t stress that either. Making just a little time for yourself, whether or not you want to label it “self-care,” is what counts. Take a tip from another TV parent, Queer Eye‘s Karamo Brown.
“Set alarms on your phone all day long to remind you to take time for yourself,” he told us last year, instructing everyone, parents or not, find a room with a lock on the door, go in there, and escape for even a few minutes. “And no matter how much your kids knock on the door or do whatever, as long as they’re safe on the other side of that door, don’t feel guilty about not answering it.
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