Maybe I missed something. Her parents decided to not attend the rehearsal dinner at his parents' house. The next paragraph was the son calling to see if the parents were going to the wedding, where they confirmed that they weren't. Who originally decided that they wouldn't attend?
My mom hasn't really talked to me in like 10 years bc I "left" the LDS Church and didn't go on a Mormon mission... .. but its "my fault" according to her
It sounds cliche' but the first thing I thought was that it wasn't him wanting the separation, but he was just too soft to stand up to his wife. My wife is currently estranged from her dad, and it is the exact same situation. His wife doesn't care for his "old" kids, and only wants him to herself. Similar to how this wife seems not interested in his "old" family. Very sorry for the family, but some people are just f***s. Shame is the son won't realize what it's cost him till it's too late, if ever.
A sad commentary to be sure. Her son should have discussed his feelings and the issues before cutting her out of his life. However, there is no guarantee that your children will 'stick with you' or even like you.
It's such a lengthy essay, yet the critical moment where the mother somehow offended the fiance's family at the bridal shower is glossed over with this one sentence: " Dan came back on and said something about me being unfriendly at the bridal shower the month before." Since this moment is such catalyst, I would have liked to have known more about it. What did she do? Or didn't do? How might they have gotten that impression? Did she talk it out with Dan? I have a feeling we're not getting the full story.
Seems fairly obvious that his fiance/wife purposely manipulated her son so SHE was the only woman in his life. That means her son was a weak-minded cuck all along.
We are estranged from my husbands mom. I don't know what story she is telling, all I can tell anyone is our side. His mom is fairly high maintenance. It doesn't matter what is happening in our lives, it almost always is twisted to be about her. She has never been to our home, we are less than an hour away from her, but she visits his brother's (a dr.) home frequently. They live 4 hours away. She was there for the birth of every one of their children and her daughters child. Our children she didn't even meet them until they were a few months old. Even with all of that, we still made it a point to include her. The kids knew to never depend on her for football games, recitals, concerts etc. Although she was at the other kids events. Photos all over Facebook of herself and them.. just never of ours. She would invite her other grand kids up for the summer, but never our kids. Then my husbands sister went to jail and treatment for drug addiction. She fell apart. I ended up being the shoulder to cry on, the counselor and friend. It strengthened our bond and reforged some family ties. Until I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. Outside of my husband I didn't tell anyone. Throughout my treatments I did not lose my hair. Outside of my eyelashes and eyebrows. For this she called my husband up and told him that I was lying. He explained that he had been to all of my treatments with me, he could send her copies of our medical bills if she wanted. Nothing mattered. She had it in her head that I was lying and nothing no one could say changed that. Then my husband caught a strange bacteria and almost died. While he was in the hospital, she came to visit. This was weird as she hadn't spoken to us in 2 years. After numerous attempts to get me out of the room, I finally left. While my husband lay there on a respirator, pain meds and a fever of 105, she broke down and somehow made it about her. He snapped and told her off. He still doesn't remember exactly what he told her that day, just that he was tired of her guilt trips, sick of the way she treated our children and he wouldn't tolerate a negative word about his wife. However, that was 2 years ago. Since then she has cut us all of her life. Even the grandchildren. We are not invited to Christmas, Thanksgiving... nothing. I send her monthly updates on all of the grandkids and even us with no response. I truly believe that there are parents out there that just do not know how to love their children equally. Which is the situation in our case. But I also think that spouses can manipulate in a way that makes it look like the parents are the bad guys. Either way, no matter how hard it is, cutting toxic people out of your life is not a bad thing.... even if it is family.
Parents need to stop living for their kids and start living for themselves. That isn't to say neglect your kids, but the number of women I know who alienated their husband by always putting the kids first and then feel "abandoned" by their grown children who they did "everything" for is ridiculous. Everyone has their own life to live. If you decide to live yours for someone else don't be surprised when they don't return the favor.
There is something missing here. Surely one of her other children would have talked to their brother to get the full story as it sounds like they weren't "disinvited" from the wedding.