Dear Ronda Rousey: Lube Is Super Cool!

(Corbis)

Dear Ronda,

(Can I call you Ronda? Or do you prefer Champion Rousey?)

We think that the way you have shown that women can be tough, strong, and awesome at mixed martial arts is pretty amazing. (Not to mention that you totally showed that pay equity is no joke by becoming Ultimate Fighting Championship’s current highest paid fighter for any gender.)

Oh, and that Olympic medal for Judo is not shabby, too.

So it’s because you are such a cool, barrier-breaking (ha! pun!) woman that we wanted to help fill you in about vaginas, since we’ve heard you’ve had a little confusion about what they do and when and why.

See, when you told Maxim readers that when it comes to women, if you have to use “lube, then you’re a disgrace” that was…pretty bad. And when people started mentioning that your comments were not so great and you said, “I thought I was doing all the girls a favor, you know, making sure that their guys put in some effort. But now it sounds like some gritty kitty b*****s are really f***ing mad at me. I’m like, It’s not my fault you’re working with a sandbox.”

Where shall we begin?

Ok, to start, Ronda, just a helpful FYI that not only do not all women have vaginas, but some people with vaginas may not identify as women, too – so heads up for when you talk about sex that, well, there are a lot of people out there in the world and they all deserve to have it and enjoy it regardless of how they identify and what parts they might have.

Also, lube?! A disgrace??? In the famous words of Cher Horowitz: As if.

Related: 5 Times Ronda Rousey Seriously Inspired Us

Some quick facts first. For cisgender women, vaginal lubrication can happen when the person becomes aroused. Blood starts flowing towards the genitals, which in turn releases vaginal fluid. And crazy yet true, but the amount of fluid released can be dependent on a whole lot of things, from hormones to the kinds of stuff you usually talk about only in therapy.

And there is absolutely no such thing as a “right” amount of wetness. A woman who gets super wet when aroused is no more or less a woman entitled to or with the possibility of enjoying sex than a woman who does not.

Going through menopause? You might not produce as much “natural” lube. Taking hormones of any kind? Yup – you also might not get very wet on your own. Super into the sex you are having mentally but with some kind of sexual trauma in your past? You guessed it – you also might not get wet. And it’s not because you don’t want to, and don’t want to be having sex, but more because your body and your brain aren’t quite in synch and certainly neither partner engaged in a wanted, consensual sex act is to blame for that.

Sex and sexuality are nuanced, vast, complex – and yes, of course, wonderful.

Need lube to do the deed? Great! Don’t? Great! (Don’t feel like doing it at all? Also great! Want to do it all the time? Good for you!)

Related: 5 Life Lessons From ‘Entourage’ Star, UFC Fighter Ronda Rousey

In other words: Whatever sex looks like for each individual – and whatever support items ensure that a person have the kind of fulfilling sexual experience they desire – is cool.

We hope you’ll agree with us that being sex positive, and understanding of the various physical and psychological needs and desires of all people wishing to have positive sexual experiences, is always something worth fighting for.

Let’s keep in touch! Follow Yahoo Health on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Pinterest.