Twice now, we've asked customer service, food service, and retail workers in our BuzzFeed Community, "What's your wildest 'Holy heck, this customer is almost hilariously irrational' story?" Well, their absolutely unhinged anecdotes inspired others to share even MORE tales of C.S. terror — and now we have a part three for you! The terror never ends!
So, with that in mind, here are even MORE of the most irrational customer stories shared:
1.This quiet talker:
"When I was six months pregnant, I had a woman come into the convenience store where I worked and she mumbled a question to me from all the way across the store. Obviously — in a crowded store with many other people talking over her — I couldn’t hear her, and I had to ask her three separate times to speak up.
She finally decided to walk a little closer, but instead of speaking any louder, she started to condescendingly speak slower instead. I responded in kind, just as slowly as she had spoken to me. Turns out, she didn’t like that any more than I did, and the manager told her that when she tried to complain to them about 'my attitude.'"
2.This water hater:
"When I was a cashier at Walmart, I had this very grumpy old man come through my line. It was raining all day, and, unfortunately, the conveyor belt would get wet if someone had a wet cart. I tried to keep the belt dry, but customers never wanted to wait for me to wipe it down.
The old man had some clothes he was purchasing and he didn't want to put them on the beltl, but also didn't want to wait for me to wipe it down, convinced that the area was filthy. So he handed me each item to scan and bag, which worked fine, until he handed me two things at once and the sleeve fell into a small bit of water on the belt. He threw a fit and demanded that I 'void' the last item. I told him, 'Sir, I'm sorry, but it's just rain water. It won't hurt the clothes.' Of course the curmudgeon complained to management and I got scolded for saying that."
3.This defective(?) test:
"I once had a customer attempt to return a used pregnancy test. She was demanding a refund, saying that it didn't work, as she 'was clearly not pregnant.'"
—Lisa O'Connor, Facebook
4.This security officer who deserves a raise:
"I work for a store that has a very strict, 'no receipt, no return' policy. I was the on-duty manager one day, and got a call about an irate customer with a return issue. This woman was returning multiple sets of wine glasses, tablecloths, napkins, flatware, and candleholders. Obviously, they had been bought for a wedding reception, and — after they were used — she was trying to return them. Unfortunately for her, she has lost her receipt!
She immediately went off on me, telling me that I needed to make an exception for her. I told her that we don’t make exceptions for anyone. She then asked if I was the store manager. I told her that, yes, I was the manager in charge at this time. She said that she wanted to speak to the store manager. I told her that he wasn’t in today, but I could leave him her information. She told me, 'No, you're going to call him now." I said that's not happening, that it was his day off. She said that she didn't care and wasn’t leaving until she spoke with him. I told her that if she didn’t leave, the police would be called.
Around this time, our security officer came up and asked if I needed assistance. I told him no, and that she was leaving. She then said she wouldn't leave, and would have to be 'dragged out.' So our security officer told her, 'Okay! I haven't dragged anyone out in a couple of days, so I'm looking forward to it.'
She proceeded to grab her stuff and run, all while yelling that we'd all be out of a job by tomorrow. That was last year, I still have the job."
5.This $15 bounced check:
"This was back in the '90s. I worked at a franchise store that sold for a major brand. The store had its own name, but also had the brand name on its merchandise. This woman wanted to write a check, but she started writing it for the brand instead of the store's name (which was written on the wall behind me). I attempted to correct her, but she insisted our store name was NOT right, and told me I was 'lying.' The manager came over and tried to correct her, as well, but she was not hearing it. She was so volatile, he let her have the $15 item essentially for 'free' by accepting her incorrectly addressed check."
6.This drive-thru nightmare:
"I worked as a pharmacy technician at a pharmacy with a drive-thru window. Customers weren't supposed to demand that we shop for them while they sat in the drive-thru because they could hold up the line, but some people didn't care. One woman demanded that I find her some very specific adult diapers. I looked everywhere, but we didn't have them. I grabbed the closest thing I could find to her description, and asked if those were acceptable. She then proceeded to yell at me and tried to throw her LIT CIGARETTE THROUGH THE OPEN WINDOW AT ME before peeling away. Thankfully, she had terrible aim and missed, but I was so angry that I was shaking. I could have been burned!"
7.This incredibly rude human being:
"I worked at Walmart. One time, an older man and his wife came through my line. The wife was in a scooter, and the man had their cart behind her. Well, he had dog food at the bottom of his cart, so I had to go beside her scooter — the space in between her and the other register beside me — but I was having trouble fitting through because she was really close to the other register.
This man looked at me, in my eyes, and said, 'You know, if you lost some weight, you’d fit through there.'”
8.This bathroom babysitter:
"I went to the bathroom at my retail job, and — after I washed and dried my hands — a woman with five kids plus a baby in her arms came in. She then proceeded to hand me her baby WHILE asking if I could hold it while she helped the other kids use the bathroom. Which, personally, I'm fine holding babies, but I couldn't believe she'd just hand off her infant to a stranger?!"
9.This baked ziti murder:
"This old man came into our restaurant and ordered a 'baked ziti with butter instead of marinara' and was indignant when his order arrived because it had cheese on it. Our baked ziti is described on the menu as 'pan-tossed penne pasta with ricotta and parmesan, baked with marinara sauce and mozzarella.' This shit is LOADED with cheese, but — when he was ordering — he failed to mention that he didn't want any cheese IN ADDITION to not wanting marinara sauce. I always repeat the order back to the customer at least twice, and he didn’t correct me, although he had the opportunity to do so.
So, when his order came out, he came at me ready to fight, acting like I was trying to intentionally kill his wife, who is apparently 'deathly allergic' to cheese."
"When I worked in Woolworths, we had a man come in who wanted to buy a TV. We didn't keep everything in stock, and this was an 'order only' item. He told us that we were illegally advertising stock we didn't have, and left. He returned with the police, who he'd told that we 'refused to serve' him. He was eventually made to leave after much screaming and shouting, and him informing me that 'he was a millionaire.' I told him that it was a shame he didn't buy any manners, then."
—Jan Bishop, Facebook
11.This potty mouth:
"I work in retail and one night (about 15 minutes before we closed) our till system shut down. This meant we couldn't serve anyone, as we couldn't put items through the till. Since we only had 15 minutes left anyway, I decided to simply close up the shop.
As I was letting one of my employees out, a customer came to the door, trying to get in. I kindly explained that we weren't able to serve them and were closing up a little early, as we'd had an issue with the tills. The customer was outraged, and — as she started to walk away — she shouted, 'Well, I'll just have to go somewhere else then! Go fuck yourself!' My colleague and I were gobsmacked!"
12.This penny pincher:
"I worked at Target and someone once tried to pay in all coins, saying, 'But don’t worry, they’re already counted and in rolls!' She takes them out, and she'd literally wrapped them in different pieces of paper towel with tape to keep them together. I then had to unwrap and count all of these different coins for a $30 purchase."
13.This wasteful habit:
"My first job was as a cashier at a grocery store, and my biggest pet peeve was when customers would shove perishable food items they no longer wanted into the magazine racks while they were checking out. There were so many times that I would catch them doing it, and politely say, 'Oh! I can take that for you instead, so we can run it back to the shelf later!'
Usually, people would hand it over just fine, but on a couple of occasions, the person would look me dead in the eye and just finish shoving the item in there."
14.This lost lady:
"I had a lady come into the hotel I worked at, demanding to speak to someone named 'Rosa.' I told her that we didn't have a worker named Rosa at our hotel, but she just kept raising her voice more and more, and demanding to speak with her. So, I asked if she was at the right hotel. She gave me the address, and, sure enough, she needed to go to the hotel a street down. This woman caused a scene in our office for no reason."
—Diane Escamilla, Facebook
15.This bad luck(?):
"I worked as a T-Mobile customer service agent for three years, and an unfortunate-but-way-too-common thing was customers calling in to (obviously) lie about a relative dying in order to get out of paying their bill. We had one repeat caller who — in the course of just two billing cycles — had four dead grandmas, two dead children, a dead mom, a dead brother, AND a dead grandpa."
16.This attempted manslaughter:
"Back when I worked at Walmart, I once had a customer threaten to 'sue' me because I put his eggs and bread in the same bag, so I was clearly 'trying to give him salmonella.' The eggs were all in one piece in a Styrofoam container, and the bread was in a plastic bag, as well, so nothing was touching."
17.This bad listener:
"I worked the patio as a hostess at a popular local bar and restaurant that didn’t take reservations, but we did offer 'call ahead seating.' I once had a guy call to make a reservation, so I gave him my whole scripted speech on how we don’t do reservations, but he could call back an hour before he planned to show up, and we'd put his name on our waitlist (which doesn’t guarantee a table as soon as a customer arrives, but their name will already be on the list, so it cuts down on waiting time). I explained this three separate times on the first phone call, then again when he called an hour before he planned to arrived, like I told him to do.
He showed up and I told him it’d be about a half hour wait, but he’d be more than welcome to get a drink at the bar in the meantime. He started screaming at me, saying, 'Why the fuck did I have to call you to make a reservation? Why don’t you have a goddamn table for me?!'
So I explained the 'call ahead seating' concept a fifth time while I waved my manager over. He continued ranting and raving, and she asked if I explained it to him (she knew I did). I said yes, several times. He spent the rest of his time waiting for a table standing right next to me, telling everyone who came up what 'a nasty bitch' I was, and I just had to stand there and pretend I didn’t hear him."
18.This A+ pun:
"I’m an optician (so, a pharmacist for glasses/contacts, basically) and I manage a doctor's office and retail store, as well as a lab that does minor repairs. So, one day, a man comes in with glasses broken in half that he clearly did not buy from us, and asked if we could fix them. They were broken in half at the nose bridge. We do not solder — and these were plastic frames anyway — nor do we keep glue around, because that can damage lenses.
I kindly told him these were, unfortunately, past repair. He then demanded to talk to 'THE MAN' in the back, and that there has to be something he could do for him. It was clear he was totally chauvinistic, and obviously did not like being told 'no' by a woman. So, I said, 'Well, sir, I am the MANager, sorry!'"
—Lindsay Woltjer, Facebook
19.And finally — these entitled parents to rule all entitled parents:
"The other day I was waiting on a family of five, and one of the kids ordered a smoothie. I repeat all the drinks back, making sure the parents heard what their kids had ordered (especially since some drinks cost extra and don't have free refills). The parents okayed the kids drinks. So, I brought all of the drinks to the table, and this kid asks for a 'bigger' smoothie. I check with his parents, they say fine. Okay, cool.
I come back two minutes later with the bigger smoothie, and the parents start screaming at me, demanding to know 'what I put in their kid's drink' because he threw up at the table. I calmly told them, 'He ordered a strawberry smoothie, which is strawberries and yogurt blended with ice.' The mom interrupted me, yelling, 'But he’s lactose intolerant! How could you let him have that?!' I was literally standing there, staring at this woman like…wait, what?!"
You've read theirs but now it's your turn! Share your wildest "irrational customer" story in the comments below! Oh, and be sure to check out the first AND second list in this series for even more tales of terror!
Note: Some submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.