How CBD Stopped My Anxious Spiraling

From ELLE

The first time I tried weed, I hated it. I’d heard tales of transcendent experiences where one tasted new tastes and heard new sounds, where you felt at peace and one with the universe. Me? I had just moved to Montreal. I was 18, drunk, and, in an attempt to impress a boy, smoked an entire joint. Throwing up on myself was the evening’s denouement.

As a control freak with hints of social anxiety, the experience put me off getting too high for a long time, but I continued to use small amounts for two reasons: I’m scared of pills, and, having had insomnia for most of my life, I quickly learned that weed helped me sleep. Still, I hid my use because of the stigma. While other substances like alcohol are normalized in American culture, weed hasn’t fully shed its stoner reputation. Knowing wine vocabulary means you’re refined and cultured; understanding terps means you’re a lost pothead.

There’s also, of course, the fact that weed is still federally illegal. Even with all the beautiful lifestyle magazines cropping up, cannabis possession remains punishable by up to a year in jail and a $1,000 fine--punishments that disproportionately affect people of color. According to the Drug Policy Alliance, nearly 80 percent of people in federal prison and 60 percent of people in state prison for drug offenses are black or Latino. But even with my considerable white privilege, I kept my consistent cannabis use private because I didn’t want to be unfairly judged. And though it definitely helped, casual cannabis use didn’t entirely ease my anxiety. I still felt like the “this is fine” dog way too often:

Some knowledgeable friends in California suggested I experiment with products high in CBD, a predominant chemical in weed (referred to as a cannabinoid). CBD binds to receptors in your brain and body and, most notably, is the component of weed that won’t get you high. That means the DEA is less concerned about its proliferation: Hemp-derived CBD only has trace elements of THC, so it’s technically legal cross-country. It’s also why you’re starting to see an explosion in CBD products. Everything from creams to tinctures, gummies, powders, and dog paw ointments-look hard enough, and CBD can start to feel like a catch-all to any ailment, including anxiety.

But after I started using Ritual Drops CBD 20:1, I did begin to feel better. Lighter. I handled conflict better. Breakups were easier. I was the “this is fine dog” but the flames were ambient candles in a Scandinavian spa. Most noticeably, I was more productive. After a year of consistent use, it didn’t feel scary to start my own company. Instead of worrying about everything that could go wrong, I thought about how I could succeed.

Dr. Josh Kaplan, a neuroscientist who specializes in cannabis research, confirmed that my experience likely wasn’t just the result of a placebo effect. “CBD can increase serotonin signaling which is thought to contribute to its anxiolytic effects. It's also been shown to reduce signaling out of the brain's fear center … thereby suggesting that CBD could make one more resilient to [a] negative/stressful event,” he said.

But just like with any medication, how much you take matters. Kaplan explained that dosing, particularly for anxiety, is extremely important because “CBD’s benefits are lost with too high a dose.” If you take too much CBD, research shows its positive effects on serotonin can be overridden, so, Kaplan advises you try different doses and see what works for you.

He was also quick to point out that CBD simply hasn’t been studied long enough to deduce exactly how effective it is. Many of the current studies we’re seeing are pre-clinical, and while results have been promising, without rigorous clinical testing, science won’t be able to confirm or deny benefits of cannabis-based products.

So, what should you do if you want to test-drive CBD? Try a few brands, starting with tinctures, since they’re easy to dose and add to a routine. (I started with Charlotte’s Web-no affiliation!) Put a low dose in your coffee in the morning before heading to work and monitor your mood. Is your commute less hellish? Are you feeling more zen master in meetings? While you should feel results fast, Kaplan notes that for maximum effectiveness, trace amounts of THC may be helpful, so maybe hit up a dispensary the next time you’re on the West Coast.

We’ve only scratched the surface of what cannabis can do medically, but normalizing use is the first step to getting legislators on board for the least partisan issue on Capitol Hill. It’s also important for white, privileged CBD users like myself to speak out to help destigmatize cannabis and stop the unfair criminalization of people of color for minor drug offenses. As Cynthia Nixon recently put it, “The reality is that for white people, marijuana has effectively been legal for years. It’s time to legalize it for everyone else.”

You Might Also Like

• 50 Surprising Things You Never Knew About 'Sex and the City'

• 15 Gorgeous Natural Hairstyle Ideas

• The 36 Hottest Makeup Trends From the Year You Were Born Until Today