This Bridesmaid Is Being Accused Of "Ruining" Her Best Friend's Bridal Shower Over Her Nail Polish Color

There are a lot of things that are "off limits," so to speak, when it comes to weddings. For example, we all know wearing white on someone's wedding day is offensive, but have you ever thought about nail polish color? Well, this bride did and it has set the internet off. Here's the story...

A person is having their fingernails painted, possibly preparing for a wedding ceremony
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It all starts with this "Am I The Asshole" Reddit thread which involves a 24-year-old bride and her best friend of 15 years (who is 25 years old, and the author of this thread, or OP for short) as one of the bridesmaids. "We have always been on good terms with zero fights previously; this may be chalked up to the fact that I absolutely hate conflict so I always try to either de-escalate situations or simply adhere to her wishes," the OP said in the thread.

Woman in white robe taking a selfie, with "BRIDE TO BE" balloons in the background
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"She has been planning a wedding for close to two years now, and she asked me to be her maid of honor as soon as she got engaged. I was ecstatic to be a part of this happy time for her, but that excitement has slowly started dying down because of how she's been treating me the last few months," continued the OP.

Two women talking in a park, one with hands on her hips, likely discussing wedding plans
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The final straw, according to the OP, was during the bridal shower. "I arrived early to set up decorations, games, food, etc. before the event because I wanted to make sure she'd have a memorable day. Everything looked beautiful, and when my best friend got there, she looked thrilled... Until she saw my white nails. I could see she was staring at my hands and making a face, but she initially brushed it off when I asked what was wrong."

Three women setting a table for an outdoor wedding dinner, one arranging flowers, another with a ladder
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"We started to get ready for some fun bridal games when my friend pulled me aside to have a private chat. I assumed it would be about how the day was going, but what she said honestly just hurt my feelings. She told me she wanted me to either rip off my nails or go home because she felt like the white nails were a subtle dig at her or a way for me to take attention off of her as white is 100% reserved for the bride."

Person holding nail polish with freshly manicured nails suitable for a wedding
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"I absolutely did not wear them on purpose; I had bought cute little press-on nails for a date with my boyfriend and just hadn't taken them off. Anyway, I told her no, I would not be taking them off because this situation was honestly ridiculous and it wasn't like I was wearing a white dress or anything to take the attention from her. As I said before, I absolutely hate conflict, so I think the fact I was standing up to her caught her off guard. She looked stunned, and then she started tearing up and saying I was trying to ruin the day for her. Her mom came over to ask what was wrong, and I tried to explain it was just a misunderstanding, but my friend told me to leave because I wasn't respecting her wishes as the bride."

Bride in a strapless wedding dress pointing and shouting, expression of surprise or urgency, holding a bouquet
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So, the OP left. However, now she says people are messaging her siding with the bride, that she should have removed her nails. "Her fiancé even asked me to apologize and make up so the wedding can run smoothly in a few days. Apparently, she didn't think I'd actually leave and thought I'd rip off my nails after her threat."

Rows of various colored nail polish samples for selection at a wedding salon
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She wraps up the situation saying, "Honestly, I'm just really confused about how this all happened. It's making me question my friendship with her; my boyfriend said she's acting jealous and I didn't do anything to warrant her reaction. But honestly, I'm starting to feel like the asshole. All I had to do was take the stupid nails off and let the day go smoothly. I genuinely don't know if I fucked up or not, or if she's just being controlling. So, am I the asshole?"

A person applying nail polish to fingernails, possibly in preparation for a wedding ceremony
Emmanuel Faure / Getty Images

Now, I scrolled long and hard to find differing opinions but, on Reddit, I couldn't find a single one that sided with the bride. Everyone seems to back the OP in this situation. Here's what a few people said:

"Nails? Really? If her granny comes to the wedding is she going to have to cover up her white hair? This girl sounds utterly exhausting. You didn't show up in a bridal gown, and it wasn't even the wedding. I'm not personally familiar with any rule that says that you can't wear a white dress to a bridal shower, much less white nails! Is white forbidden in her presence from the day of her engagement until after the honeymoon? Ridiculous."


"If this is her hill to die on, so be it. She lost her mind and threw you out for press on nails. If she can’t realize she messed up, I’d say stay home. Not because you cannot wear white nails, but because of the disrespect and disregard for all your efforts. You sound like a fantastic and very thoughtful friend. But friendship is a two-way street. How does she take care of you?"


"Not the asshole. They are nails. I get not wearing a white dress but never heard of not being able to wear white nails. She needs to get a grip and get over herself."


"This person is NOT your friend. She has NEVER considered you equal to her in the relationship. She says 'jump,' you respond 'how high', and she is used to this dynamic. All of a sudden, you stand up for yourself and she is upset that she is no longer the 'boss' of the relationship. She wasn't upset at the white nails, she was upset you stood up for yourself. If you want to go back to being the 'underling' the 'subordinate' then apologize and grovel, because we all know she is going to want you to grovel. Otherwise, tell her to GTFU and be an adult. Your relationship will change but it will be better for you."


"'Oh, look everyone, do you see how pretty her nails are? Much nicer than the brides.' You see how ridiculous that sounds? Your 'friend' is a bully. It is more telling how everyone wants you to agree just to appease her because there is no freaking way I'd be messaging you saying to just take the nails off. Seriously, crying over nail colors?????"


Even though Reddit doesn't think the OP is in the wrong, there are still people in the wedding party who think she is. So, we want to ask our BuzzFeed readers: what do you think? Let us know in the comments!

Bride and groom appear discontent in a car, groom on phone, bride looking away
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