A bride-to-be went viral on TikTok after sharing a letter to her bridesmaids detailing 'mandatory' wedding commitments

·2 min read
bridesmaids letter tiktok
Lisa Torres. Lisa Torres/TikTok
  • Lisa Torres went viral on TikTok after sharing a letter to her bridesmaids.

  • In the letter she outlined "mandatory" commitments, such as her bachelorette trip.

  • She told BuzzFeed she wanted to "destigmatize" discussions about cost and expectations.

  • Visit Insider's homepage for more stories.

A woman went viral on TikTok after sharing a letter she wrote to her bridesmaids explaining what was expected of them.

Lisa Torres, 29, got engaged to Alex Cortes, her boyfriend, in April. To prepare for the wedding, Torres said, she sent a "bridesmaid proposal box" to her bridal party that included the two-page letter.

"I am going to share a tip that I used to be more transparent with my bridal party," Torres said in one video, posted June 6. "Before I got engaged, I was a bridesmaid before, and I wasn't fully aware of all the costs and expectations associated with being a bridesmaid."


#stitch with @stephanieberman7 I was scared to have a #transparency letter in the #bridesmaidproposalbox but it WORKED OUT. #wedding #weddingtiktok

♬ original sound - Lisa 💙

Torres went on to say she wrote the letter to outline time and money commitments for her bridesmaids as well as to provide them the opportunity to say no if they didn't want to be part of the bridal party.

The video had 1 million likes at the time of writing.

In another video, posted June 7, Torres shared a close-up look at the letter, which detailed mandatory commitments such as the rehearsal dinner and bachelorette trip as well as optional commitments including the bridal shower and wedding-dress shopping.

She shared her preferred color of bridesmaids dresses - "dusty rose" - and ideas for her bachelorette party, which she wrote that she would like to have at an all-inclusive resort in Mexico.


Reply to @silly16boo Your #transparencyletter may look different, & that’s okay. We envision different things.❤️ #wedding #weddingtiktok #bridesmaids

♬ original sound - Lisa 💙

Torres also shared her estimated costs for the bridesmaids dresses - about $200 each - and the bachelorette trip, which she expected to cost $500 a person.

"It's really important to destigmatize the discussion around the cost and expectations of being a bridesmaid," Torres told BuzzFeed, adding that it was "heartbreaking" to see people leave comments describing "friendships ending because this important discussion didn't happen beforehand."

She added that she hoped people were encouraged to focus on the "bigger picture" that "transparency is the best policy" and to "normalize allowing people to say no to being part of a wedding party."

Torres did not immediately respond to a request for comment from Insider.

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