Bean crusader demolishes 7-pound burrito in 7 minutes

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Close-up of black bean burrito
Close-up of black bean burrito

For some, eating is a simple act of nourishment. You get hungry, you eat, you complete your little tasks, you repeat the cycle a few hours later when you get hungry again. But for others, eating is a show of human fortitude; an opportunity to demonstrate one’s commitment to excellence. That’s the case for Molly Schuyler, a competitive eater who demolished a seven-pound burrito in seven minutes and 48 seconds at El Mariachi Mexican Grill in Ionia, Michigan, Michigan news station WLNS reports.

If Schuyler’s name sounds familiar, it’s because we wrote about her last week after she downed 44 chili dogs in just 19 minutes at The Corner Bar in Rockford, Michigan. Given three additional minutes, she managed to down six more for a grand total of 50 chili dogs in 22 minutes.

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Here’s the wildest part: Schuyler’s chili dog-snarfing fest took place on Wednesday, July 7, and she downed the seven-pound burrito the next day, Thursday, July 8. The fact that Schuyler managed to complete two such gut-busting, bean-centric feasts within 48 hours speaks to something almost inhuman (although Schuyler does describe herself on her YouTube channel as the “master of unrealistic consumption – yet still human.) How far does this woman’s stomach stretch? Does she have some sort of hyper-efficient colon? Where is she putting all of this food?

According to the bio on Schuyler’s YouTube channel, she’s been competitively eating around the U.S. since 2012. Her channel is full of videos of previous challenges, which she labels “THE MOM and WOMAN vs FOOD!!” It seems at though Schuyler is the patron saint of eating that we didn’t know we needed. We’ll be following Our Lady Of Competitive Eating closely for future feats, which may or may not involve beans.