“Bachelorette” Kaitlyn Bristowe Breaks News to World: Women Like to Have Sex
The Bachelorette, which, this season, stars 30-year-old Kaitlyn Bristowe, is a show about one woman’s search for true love under very abnormal conditions — conditions like constant cameras, exotic vacations, sumo wrestling, awkward rap battles, and some very creative editing. Oh, and your many “boyfriends” are all living together under one roof. What fun!
In the real world, unless you have specific religious or moral convictions, part of finding one’s true love — or, you know, just killing some time on a boring Saturday night — is having sex, whether it’s with the person you might marry, or the hot guy working behind the bar. On Monday night’s episode, Kaitlyn was having a good date, felt horny, and then had sex with suitor Nick Viall. No biggie, right?
Wrong. The Internet instantaneously exploded with judgment, on several levels. Though producers had (rather distastefully) hinted at Kaitlyn’s romp as far back as the season’s premiere — showing clips of her woefully crying alone the morning after — it wasn’t until Monday’s episode had aired in full that the trolls really came out. Kaitlyn had her supporters, too, like Amy Schumer (who had a guest spot on an earlier episode), who tweeted, “Oh no someone slept with a guy they’re dating and considering marrying! Showing love for @kaitlynbristowe.”
On her end, Kaitlyn — who’s arguably one of the most relatable, liberal-minded Bachelorettes in memory — has remained brilliantly and defiantly steadfast in her conviction that her sexual encounter with Nick wasn’t a big deal. Instead of apologizing or even defending her actions, she tweeted out a sentiment that we should all probably live by a bit more frequently: “Just remember, when you judge me, you do not define me, you define yourself. think about that before sending out negativity to any1 tonight.“
And on Thursday, she took it even further, telling People that, in her eyes, the reason she’s getting so much crap is “because I’m a woman. I think it’s a double standard, for sure.”
She is probably make that, definitely right. Though the Bachelor/Bachelorette franchise has recently become more open about at least acknowledging that sex sometimes happens on the show (remember Juan Pablo slut-shaming Clare after… whatever they both did in the ocean?), it’s still a mostly taboo subject. Truly, it speaks to a bigger unwillingness on the part of us, as a society in general, to talk about sex. Hello… people have sex when they’re dating. Even women! Why shouldn’t it happen in the context of a TV show about dating?
And, in terms of double standards, it should be noted that Kaitlyn’s partner-in-crime, Nick, has now done the dirty on network TV not once, but twice! Yep — he was the same man who outed former-Bachelorette Andi Dorfman for having sex with him in the Fantasy Suite — then picking another man — on the season prior. At the time, Nick was praised for shedding light on the goings on of the Fantasy Suite — i.e., the last date before the Bachelorette makes her big decision, and the first opportunity she and her dudes have to actually spend the night together without cameras around — and the emotional connections (and heartbreak) to which it can lead. Yet, this go round, it seems to be Kaitlyn who’s bearing the brunt. Hmph.
I mean, what exactly happens in the Fantasy Suite if not sex? Foot rubs and binge-watching Orange Is the New Black? (Which is my fantasy, by the way.) No.
The other thing is that, even though more and more people are starting to grasp the idiocy of so-called “slut-shaming,” a lot of people – both men and women alike – still engage in it. Poor Kaitlyn’s even been berated by several guys this season simply for kissing too many of them. (Reminder, once again: This is a dating show.)
At the beginning of the month, singer Ariana Grande took to Twitter to blast the world for its sexist views of sexuality: “If a woman has a lot of sex (or any sex for that matter), she’s a ‘slut.’ If a man has sex, he’s a STUD, a BOSSSSSS, a KING.” It’s true.
So go, Kaitlyn, and have sex with whoever you want. Just maybe turn off your mic next time.
More from Yahoo Style:
The Bachelorette’s Stylist Talks Dress Disasters, Why Kaitlyn Bristowe Is His Favorite & More
Kaitlyn Bristowe Dishes on Being the Bachelorette, Dressing for Dates, and Her Suitors’ Style
7 Scientific Reasons Morning Sex Is The Best Sex
