Apparently, saving your significant other isn’t the most romantic and heroic thing you can do, after all. A viral video with upwards of 5.6 million views from a New York actor has caused quite a stir.
What is the hypothetical protocol when your wife asks you who you would save if she and your stepson were drowning? If you answered your wife, you could find yourself facing the threat of a divorce, according to @dhawks_’s video.
Dhawks, who says he’s been married to his wife for 10 years, said he asked her if he were drowning and her son were drowning also which of the two she’d save. He said his wife said she would save her son. However, when she asked if Dhawks would save her or his stepson, he said that he would save her.
“She starts getting upset and says I should save her son,” says Dhawks, who recalls the interactions.
He continues by explaining that he told her, “I only love him because I love you. If we had a kid together and it was my blood, it would be different. I don’t have that bond with your son that you have with him.”
Though this may sound harsh, the essence of a stepparent is “step.” They may be stepping into a situation, possibly haven’t been there the entire time, and can’t fully relate, or as he expressed, bond.
“I still love him, but you mean more to me,” DHawks added. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t love his stepson. He just loves his wife more.
DHawks and his wife are reportedly in the middle of getting a divorce. Dhawks only touches briefly on the subject, yet we can only presumably wonder if this hypothetical situation played a small part in the decision to split.
DHawks concludes his video with a few questions: “Was I wrong for actually telling her how I feel? Or should I have kept it to myself and told her what sounded nice?”
Do you remember that scene in “Baby Boy” when Jody told Yvette he lies to her because he cares about her? Should DHawks have lied to his wife instead of telling her how he really felt just because it sounded nice? When are lies acceptable?
It’s not clear if he regrets his answer to her, but he ends with the following question:
“If you were me, what would you have told her?”
How would you handle a situation like this? With such a delicate topic, would you plead the Fifth? Be politically correct and attempt to save both, or would you reason with your partner and attempt to get them to see your point of view?
DHawks explained to his wife his reasoning, but was it enough? When it comes to children, there is nothing a biological parent wouldn’t do for them, but a stepparent may not be 100 percent invested. Should they have discussed how locked in he may or may not have been with her son before they got married?
The takeaway here is don’t do hypotheticals unless you’re ready for blunt honesty. You never know how things will go or how people will perceive your words. Keep it safe and live in the now.