83 Tweets From This Month That Made Me Literally Laugh Out Loud
May has come to an end, and summer is finally upon us! There were so many great jokes on the internet this month, so enjoy some of the best and funniest tweets from this May:
And follow the accounts that made you laugh so your Twitter timeline will be even better!
1.
People nowadays are like yeah I do coke, adderall, K, whippits, heroin, speed… but get that WEED the fuck away from me
— ✮ Lux (@101103011_1) May 30, 2023
2.
As long as we remain distant when y’all break up ❤️ https://t.co/wZ2r4G0Mtt
— Bassa Babe 💗 (@lovenextdoor__) May 30, 2023
3.
— ❒ (@RlCKYRAGE) May 30, 2023
4.
tbh this is how i am on dating apps pic.twitter.com/QYjHtOAMLL
— ashley (@nextlevelashley) May 30, 2023
5.
to be jerked is human — to be milked, divine
— julie 2shoes (@h0mmelette) May 20, 2023
6.
want to make more gay friends in nyc… pic.twitter.com/ow9s4nx3IM
— m (@_mxher) May 22, 2023
7.
i remember a few years ago this girl i wanted needed her tv mounted so i offered and she called me at 4am telling me it fell off the wall and i blocked her number
— hys (@Hys3x) May 21, 2023
8.
I think im hard to want to date because I so have the demeanor of a cousin
— anne (@codinghater) May 23, 2023
9.
people would rather TOP a TWINK than STOP and THINK
— sergio (@sxrgito) July 6, 2021
10.
my only gripe about the little mermaid (2023) was king triton missing two BIG details that i think are essential to his character… pic.twitter.com/SuE1LRvCnB
— ☆ cybr amir ☆ (@cybramir) May 28, 2023
Disney / Twitter: @cybramir
11.
thats crazy pic.twitter.com/7OBuRtvzM7
— mag (@bigbabymag) May 25, 2023
12.
doxxing people in the 1700s was like “guards!!! 👉 he went thataway!”
— madi magdalene (@hottropica) May 24, 2023
13.
“Eric, no!” 🤣🧜🏽♀️ pic.twitter.com/cQf3jTtVXu
— Black Girl Nerds (@BlackGirlNerds) May 6, 2023
Twitter: @BlackGirlNerds
14.
me pushing the lil kids out the way to see the little mermaid pic.twitter.com/HTqTf5OvjM
— mar anders-logan (@koryanderscurls) May 24, 2023
Sony Pictures Releasing / Twitter: @koryanderscurls
15.
If you have 😭 as your most used emoji then you really gay af like I really don’t know what to tell you
— A (@fofequis) May 26, 2023
16.
this is bad pic.twitter.com/HhxMopkwie
— stefen 😼 (@stefenrc) May 26, 2023
17.
Hey thanks so much for inviting me out! What do you think of me? Do you think I’m cool? Did you like hanging out with me? Was I fun?
— evil rylee (@immrylee) May 28, 2023
18.
— 🐈 Smol Cat (@OneSmolCat) May 28, 2023
19.
behind every hot girl is a deep history with the hunger games
— haley (@mockingjaays) May 30, 2023
20.
hate when straight people use the term "partner" ..thought you was fuckin on sock whole time you was fuckin on STEPHEN...
— angel (@tyramail) May 31, 2023
21.
the little girl next me in the theater watching my grown ass cry during the little mermaid pic.twitter.com/xF2QgmiU85
— ⭐️ (@pinkfaiyr) May 28, 2023
A&E / Twitter: @pinkfaiyr
22.
what in the hell pic.twitter.com/pmuXXpa9YM
— reedrolling (@ReedRolling) May 20, 2023
HBO / Twitter: @ReedRolling
23.
Pll was so good cause they’d have 18 yr old spencer diffuse a bomb in 5 seconds and you wouldn’t even question it you’d just be like hm yea she is the smart one pic.twitter.com/e9huuZudjT
— Girl with no problems (@hotpriestt) May 19, 2023
24.
your honor my client needs to take his bereal
— angel (@angelmendoza___) May 21, 2023
25.
dream blunt rotation pic.twitter.com/7VRLnSJ1dP
— arabella (@romelancholia) May 22, 2023
HBO / Twitter: @romelancholia
26.
I am in line at McDonald’s right now, and I ordered just a Diet Coke and the guy working, in the most monotone voice goes, “it’s classic, iconic, known all over the world.”
— aig (@eggaig) May 21, 2023
27.
Why would Keke Palmer say this to John Stamos about going to Disney World 😂😭 pic.twitter.com/ndQFhrTqLK
— KNTY 4 NEWS (@HesABrickhouse) May 23, 2023
Baby This Is Keke Palmer / Amazon / Twitter: @HesABrickhouse
28.
Good morning pic.twitter.com/h1p899nUBb
— Sylvian (#1 Skinners of the Flower Marink Fan) (@TheAlexSylvian) May 23, 2023
29.
The real question is, what is living doing for me???!!! https://t.co/vofUPWdoJi
— sasuke hate account. (@krispykuf) May 25, 2023
30.
i get on the mic and say “what is this .. a bernie sanders rally??” and everyone laughs https://t.co/euT8UXaQxO
— al (@local__celeb) April 18, 2023
31.
Uncut men when you give them a little kiss pic.twitter.com/FFVJIckC0q
— Margaretsnatchr (@margaretsnatchr) May 27, 2023
32.
i be vibing to partition and then remember she’s talking about jay z…. pic.twitter.com/pLl30GGkSv
— mari 🍈 (@fillenulle) May 29, 2023
HBO / Twitter: @fillenulle
33.
monthly reminder not to send that text btw ☠️☠️☠️ pic.twitter.com/txg4ErGDN4
— lotus (@chariziard) May 30, 2023
34.
she's a 10 but she audibly gasps whenever she hears a one direction song playing while out in public
— Rohit ⁹¹ ×͜× (@91FINEROHIT) May 30, 2023
35.
The face I make before I say “fuck is u talkin bout?!” 😭 pic.twitter.com/W2fWa8U9An
— 𝔐⚘ (@CheemaWRLD) May 16, 2023
Twitter: @CheemaWRLD / Paramount Pictures
36.
5-year-old: Guess what? Today in school someone’s EYE broke open.Me: What???5-year-old: I’m done telling this story.
— Kristen Mulrooney (@missmulrooney) May 16, 2023
Twitter: @missmulrooney
37.
When you trying to sneeze but ya nose playing games pic.twitter.com/mx6kqKHj5P
— 𝔐⚘ (@CheemaWRLD) May 17, 2023
Nickelodeon / Twitter: @CheemaWRLD
38.
Laptop's battery: 1 hour 59 minutesremainingLaptop after 20mins pic.twitter.com/pEA8UszqtV
— Mr Constellation ✨ (@demonvianne) May 16, 2023
Vsauce / Twitter: @demonvianne
39.
— gloh (@notgloh) May 17, 2023
Twitter: @notgloh
40.
me while my friends are still laughing at the joke i just told pic.twitter.com/EuCSZl0Zyb
— The Silliest Goose (@emgracedawg) May 7, 2023
Twitter: @emgracedawg
41.
you “notify anyway” bitches will burn in hell.
— ★ kiki!! ★ (@shibukiki) May 16, 2023
Twitter: @shibukiki
42.
😭😭😭 pic.twitter.com/khVaFKCyX5
— Shine 🅴 (@voidstainedme) May 15, 2023
Twitter: @voidstainedme
43.
me when my mom starts being rude to the person that's just trying to do their job pic.twitter.com/SBkmVQ4VNg
— Usman Tariq (@koi_takleef) May 14, 2023
Disney / Twitter: @koi_takleef
44.
i be watching movies like im youtuber reacting to a video
— Aya 𑁥౿ (@ziarastar) May 15, 2023
Twitter: @ziarastar
45.
just watched a man literally flip a coin on a moving train and unblock a contact labeled "ABSOLUTELY NOT" and text them "hey" with a slutty amount of Ys
— Mika (@0pvlent) May 9, 2023
Twitter: @0pvlent
46.
interviewer: what do u bring to the tableme: potato salad if it’s like a family thinginterviewer: i meant to workme: [clearing my throat] i would bring regular potatoes. none of that funny business
— cory (@coolmathgame_) March 28, 2023
Twitter: @coolmathgame_
47.
on god bro we gon get you a mood stabilizer
— jody (@wnbagirlfriend) May 5, 2023
Twitter: @wnbagirlfriend
48.
this pic.twitter.com/32TZSYSm8X https://t.co/48vVHtOjHI
— sami 🥀 (@scarletxmars) May 12, 2023
Nickelodeon / Twitter: @scarletxmars
49.
The stories I used to hear on these tables pic.twitter.com/7Mo7kFWmqQ
— Usman Tariq (@koi_takleef) May 14, 2023
Twitter: @koi_takleef
50.
i respect a girl that will get a coca cola wit dinner like yaa..u like to have fun
— ☆.。.:*-𝘴𝘰𝘺 𝘴ú𝘱𝘦𝘳 𝘥𝘭 (@gwenisonline) May 13, 2023
Twitter: @gwenisonline
51.
me after posting on instagram pic.twitter.com/2zNF774vI6
— 𝕿𝖗𝖎𝖎𝖆𝖉 (@httptrashzy) May 13, 2023
HBO/ Twitter: @httptrashzy
52.
idk why people complain about crime waves. crime is how you keep rent low. everybody wants 90s rent but y’all too pussy for 90s crime
— fiona trapple (@bigsnugga) May 12, 2023
Twitter: @bigsnugga
53.
to a crisp https://t.co/QWbSJ3T82q pic.twitter.com/jwnY8B3S6R
— ʝօʀɖռ’ֆ աօʀʟɖ💞 (@jordnsworld) May 12, 2023
Universal Pictures / Twitter: @jordnsworld
54.
Whenever someone has “ny/nj” in their bio ….Yk where they really live pic.twitter.com/jhagAOmnF0
— BajanBattiBoi 🧚🏾 (@BelovedBaje) May 11, 2023
Bravo / Twitter:@BelovedBaje
55.
Me every time a friend tells me they went on a date pic.twitter.com/kgahxRGMuR
— Hilton Dresden (@Hiltyhilthilt) May 11, 2023
Fox Searchlight Pictures / Twitter: @Hiltyhilthilt
56.
— aperol spritz enthusiast (@uhhmarty) May 12, 2023
Twitter: @uhhmarty
57.
Where you live in a pineapple ????? https://t.co/zHDlqYvtmc
— TeeTeeTop (@TierraBrianne_) May 11, 2023
Twitter: @TierraBrianne_
58.
“I don’t bottom often” pic.twitter.com/4tvuiZHY9U
— 💫 (@heyjaeee) May 10, 2023
Twitter: @heyjaeee
59.
subway footlongs are $13 https://t.co/bkqW7vD56e
— bruce wayne (@4RIESV3NUS) May 10, 2023
Twitter: @4RIESV3NUS
60.
me in my room thinking about how to get rich pic.twitter.com/mEW386BWUU
— Maxine🍒 (@chaesoberrie) May 9, 2023
The CW / Twitter: @chaesoberrie
61.
me after making my bf nut pic.twitter.com/cCS2Xb5FzU
— QAnon Load (@badbussy_) May 8, 2023
Twitter: @badbussy_
62.
Y'all. Why I was tore up in church today. Literally like tore up, ugly crying during service.... WHY in the world would this man sitting behind me tap me on the shoulder and ask me "Did that tattoo on your neck hurt?".... pic.twitter.com/socwaMZLi0
— $aint $mith 🕊 (@SaintSmith_) May 7, 2023
Lionsgate Films / Twitter: @SaintSmith_
63.
when u get home from work and fully zone out scrolling thru ur phone for entirely too long that’s called your zoney baloney hour and everyone is entitled to at least 1 a day
— 𝕤𝕦𝕟𝕗𝕝𝕠𝕨𝕖𝕣 (@spinubzilla) May 17, 2023
Twitter: @spinubzilla
64.
Some guy just woke me up at my train stop when I was headed home from work and was like hey I know this is your stop because we’ve talked on Grindr before. And that? That’s community honey
— Josh Cotham (@JoshuaCotham) May 8, 2023
Twitter: @JoshuaCotham
65.
stop normalizing the grind and normalize whatever this is pic.twitter.com/2AJCjb3DqX
— yayodiary (@yayodiary) May 7, 2023
Václav Čtvrtek / Twitter:@yayodiary
66.
when i put “???” In a conversation, this is exactly my face behind the phone pic.twitter.com/uLNrAT4JlZ
— Maxine🍒 (@chaesoberrie) May 8, 2023
DreamWorks / Twitter:@chaesoberrie
67.
my boyfriend had to redo some of his law school applications bc he checked yes to LGBTQA he thought A stood for ally 😭😭😭😭😭😭
— Grace (@gracecamille_) May 17, 2023
Twitter: @gracecamille_
68.
how you homophobic but you do ketamine
— some kid (@iminthecut) May 17, 2023
Twitter: @iminthecut
69.
please don’t make me pay bills i’m just a 23 year old teenage girl
— clare (@sadlizards) May 17, 2023
Twitter: @sadlizards
70.
This pic got me crying cause why was he doing her like this????? pic.twitter.com/AIBNjsc3Qz
— Unohana ✭ (@jupitersembrace) May 7, 2023
Fox / Twitter: @jupitersembrace
71.
me in the mirror when the outfit came out the way i planned it in my head pic.twitter.com/7wzzKQq3TS
— dos (@lowkynumb) May 14, 2023
ABC / CBS / Twitter: @lowkynumb
72.
Y’all look at my “plug” pic.twitter.com/eyguEuCGKl
— slo𝖕𝖕y (@sloppytheone) May 6, 2023
Twitter: @sloppytheone
73.
they call me zac the way i be wondering what the efron with me 💯
— big estaban (@bigestaban) May 5, 2023
Twitter: @bigestaban
74.
me tapping his profile that states “NO TAPS” pic.twitter.com/ou1PmgBfy3
— toekneepraysick (@tonypraysick) May 5, 2023
NBA / Twitter: @tonypraysick
75.
A girl can curate a mood but it takes a woman to birth a VIBE
— 𓆸 (@evakhahar) May 12, 2023
Twitter: @evakhahar
76.
I know it smelled crazy in there. pic.twitter.com/2LqbspOYqA
— Kevín (@KevOnStage) May 8, 2023
Paramount Pictures / @KevOnStage
77.
— robert johnson (@rjohnson344452) May 11, 2023
Twitter: @rjohnson344452
78.
Oh he got my ass.. pic.twitter.com/COq9TygPoi
— possiblykimrichards (@psblykimrichrds) May 10, 2023
Twitter: @psblykimrichrds
79.
god forbid a woman wants to date a questionable man
— mariana (@pastapilled) May 6, 2023
Twitter: @pastapilled
80.
these guys ar e my guardian angels pic.twitter.com/pkxH7Ku8aW
— matt (@FlimfloomVEVO) May 7, 2023
Twitter: @FlimfloomVEVO
81.
Five months into 2023 and class of 2020 still talking about having no prom . HEAL!!!
— jax (@jaxajueny) May 9, 2023
Twitter: @jaxajueny
82.
my mom is a lawyer and when i was like 13 we got in an argument and she accidentally called me "your honour". never really came back from that one.
— Katie Martin (@katiedimartin) May 3, 2023
Twitter: @katiedimartin
83.
I'm done eating edibles why me and my cousin riding around looking for me
— NOONIEE🖤👩🏽🎤 (@noonie_2x) May 7, 2023
Twitter: @noonie_2x