Tree-mendously Hilarious Christmas Puns to Up Your Dad Joke Game This Holiday

It's the most punderful time of the year, and there's no better way to celebrate the season than with lots of Christmas puns! We've got 75 of them to up your dad joke game and keep your Christmas card messages from being anything but ordinary. They also make just the right Christmas Instagram captions for your elfies, and we break them down by category for all your punny Santa, Christmas tree, snow, and elf needs. Look snow further to find just the right Christmas pun (or 75) for any holiday occasion!

But wait, there's myrrh. If you are feeling some added ho-ho-hilarity, you can add reindeer jokes or Santa jokes to your messages too, or for a more sentimental pairing check out these Christmas quotes for your cards or even emails or texts. And the best Christmas movies on Netflix just might inspire your words too. May we also recommend filing away some of these punny one-liners for a ba-dum-tss-worthy play on words to share at Christmas dinners, holiday parties, and other festive occasions as you're having a simply wonderful Christmas thyme? These equally clever and funny lines might just having you and your friends and loved ones feeling extra Santa-mental.

Christmas Puns

Little boy carrying big cardboard box during Christmas
Niedring/Drentwett
  • “Happy holly-days,” said the wreath to the garland.

  • Yule be fit to be tide when you find out you aren’t getting any presents.

  • Prancer’s motto: “Prance like nobody's is watching.”

  • “Season’s greetings,” said the rosemary to the sage.

  • "Resting Grinch face."

  • "You sleigh me."

  • "Your presents is requested."

  • "But wait—there’s myrrh."

  • "Sleigh my name, sleigh my name."

  • "Hold on for deer life."

  • "The Christmas alphabet has noel."

  • "Shake it like a pole-oriod picture."

  • "Yule be sorry."

  • "I'm pine-ing for you."

  • "I have the final sleigh."

  • "It’s the most wine-derful time of the year."

  • "Oh, deer."

  • "All the jingle ladies, all the jingle ladies."

  • “A mistle-toast to the holiday season.”

  • "Sleigh, what?!"

  • "The snuggle is real."

  • “I love you from head to mistletoe.”

  • "You’re sleigh-in’ it."

  • "It’s the most wonderful time for a beer."

  • "Love at frost sight!"

  • "Make it rein."

  • "Sleigh queen, sleigh."

  • "It's lit."

  • "How rude-olf of you."

  • “Peppermint, or-na-ment?” she asked when contemplating hanging candy canes on tree.

  • "The Ghost of Christmas Presents is my favorite Christmas ghost."

Santa Puns

Santa claus holding cell phone
Tetra Images
  • "Santa puts you on the naughty list if he has just claus."

  • "That look soots you."

  • "I'm Claus-trophobic."

  • "Christmas has me feeling extra Santa-mental."

  • "Rebel without a Claus."

  • "You’re my soul Santa."

  • "A round of Santa-plause, please."

  • "Santa cleans his sleigh with Santa-tizer."

  • "Claus I said so!"

Christmas Tree Puns

A Christmas bauble hangs from a tree
Bloomberg Creative Photos
  • "Time to spruce things up."

  • "I’m feelin’ pine."

  • “Don’t get all sappy on me,” said the Christmas tree farmer.

  • “You wood not believe my Christmas tree is artificial.”

  • “The kids are on pines and needles waiting for Santa’s gifts to arrive under the tree.”

  • “Christmas trees wear skirts so you won’t cedar roots.”

  • "We have great chemis-tree."

  • "I’ll never fir-get."

  • "These decorations are tree-mendous."

  • "Birch, please."

  • "Fir sure."

  • "This tree is officially lit AF."

  • "Are you oakay? Yes, I'm pine!"

  • "Can I get a watt watt?"

  • "Yes, I do consider myself a Christmas tree hugger."

  • "I love you a whole watt."

  • "You need to branch out."

  • "Ready, set, glow."

Snow Puns

Snowman in snowy field
Sam Edwards
  • “There’s no business like snow business.”

  • “Chillin’ with my snowmies.”

  • “Frosty the Snowman’s personal affairs are snow-body’s business.”

  • "Snow time like the present."

  • "You snow the drill."

  • "Up to snow good."

  • "Best in snow."

  • "It’s snow joke."

  • "I told you snow."

  • "It's ice to meet you."

  • "Say it ain’t snow."

  • "Snow thank you."

  • "As it snow happens."

  • "Snow on and snow forth."

  • "It takes one to snow one."

  • "I'm snow bored."

  • "Icy what you did there."

  • "He came, he thawed, he conquered."

  • "This is snow laughing matter!"

  • "I only have ice for you."

Elf Puns

Christmas ornament
Chiara Benelli
  • “How’d you finish Christmas shopping so fast?” “I used the elf-checkout lane.”

  • "Let’s take an elfie."

  • "I’m elf-taught."

  • "Don’t be elfish."

  • "He’s an elf-made man."

  • "She has high elf-esteem."

  • "Treat yo'elf."

  • "Let’s get elf-ed up."

  • "Believe in your elf."

  • "Have your elf a merry little Christmas."

  • "Don't get caught elvesdropping on Santa!"

  • "Get the elf out of here."

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