It would probably be the understatement of the century to say that life changes as you grow up.
As a kid, your top priorities might have been winning capture the flag, avoiding monsters and eating as much candy as you can. As an adult, those goals may have shifted toward career success and healthy relationships (and maybe also still eating delicious candy, let’s be real ... ).
Still, it’s pretty funny to look back on your hopes, fears and priorities as a kid and compare them to your reality as a grown-up. Here are 30 hilarious tweets that shed light on childhood vs. adulthood.
When I was a kid, I was terrified of ghosts, monsters and being kidnapped. As an adult, I'm mostly just terrified of small talk.
— Dad and Buried (@DadandBuried) February 23, 2016
Childhood: cry because you can't stay up until midnight.
Adulthood: cry because you have to.
— Elizabeth Hackett (@LizHackett) January 1, 2017
As a kid: I hope to one day cure diseases and be an Olympic swimmer.
Me as an adult: I hope to one day finish a bottle of shampoo and conditioner at the same time.
— Abby Heugel (@AbbyHasIssues) July 6, 2018
When I was a kid I thought 40 was so old. Now that I'm in my 40s I realize it's so much worse than I thought.
— Tim (@Playing_Dad) August 19, 2015
As a child - boys have cooties
As an adult - ALL people have cooties and should be avoided
— EnvyDaTropic (@envydatropic) June 28, 2018
I've eaten nothing but Skittles today so being a grownup is as amazing as I imagined it would be when I was a kid.
— Just Linda (@LindaInDisguise) September 2, 2016
When I was a kid, I had nightmares about getting eaten by monsters now they just involve running into co-workers outside of the office
— Brian Gaar (@briangaar) November 17, 2014
When I was a kid I used to force myself to sob to "hero". Like I had no shit to be sad about but I would force myself to sob.
— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) April 22, 2015
Xmas movies for kids: is Santa real? Is magic real? Let’s have an adventure!!
Xmas movies for adults: WILL SHE OR WON’T SHE GET A BOYFRIEND
— Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) December 24, 2017
Childhood: I WANT IT TO BE CHRISTMAS EVERY DAY.
Adulthood: It's December 8th. The Christmas music is relentless. I will confess to anything.
— Elizabeth Hackett (@LizHackett) December 9, 2017
When I was little I wanted to be a zookeeper and surrounded by animals and now I'm on Twitter so it's the same thing and I achieved my goals
— Bec Shaw (@Brocklesnitch) February 27, 2016
Kid me: I HAVE SO MANY DREAMS I WANT TO ACCOMPLISH HOO-RAH
Adult me: I would like to lay down and stare at a ceiling for ten years
— Elspeth Eastman (@elspetheastman) November 22, 2017
When I was younger I wanted to be a doctor or a superhero. Now I just want to be able to eat without getting up.
— Swishergirl (@Swishergirl24) April 19, 2014
When I was a kid I used to open the fridge, find nothing I wanted, wander around the kitchen a bit, then repeat.
I feel like my life hasn't changed much, except now Twitter is my fridge.
— parker (@pt) June 27, 2018
When I was younger I'd see a character eating cereal w/booze for milk & think "that person is sad," now I think "that person is WASTEFUL!"
— maura quint (@behindyourback) February 3, 2016
When I was a kid, something I was sincerely concerned about when digging was accidentally hitting a Chinese kid in the head with a shovel.
— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) July 9, 2017
As a kid, you got sent you to your room to think about what you'd done. As an adult, you go there willingly to think about what you haven't.
— Kendra Alvey (@Kendragarden) March 11, 2016
As a kid, I never got how adults cried about good things. Now it's pretty much all I do.
— Sophia Benoit (@1followernodad) November 1, 2016
When I was a kid, I hated going to bed. Now I cherish EVERY hour of sleep.
— Amazing Facts (@FactSoup) June 24, 2018
When I was a kid, I thought my archenemy would have super powers, turns out it's just a dude I work with who won't mute his cell phone
— Brian Gaar (@briangaar) December 17, 2014
when i was a kid i would be like “ew boys” and my mom would say “darling, some day you’ll like boys” but congratulations mom i’m a lesbian so ew boys
— ᴸᴱˢᴸᴱʸ ᴬᴸᴸᴬᴺ 🛸 (@_lesleyallan) June 22, 2018
when i was a kid i had big dreams of travelling to new places and drinking in fancy american chain restaurants i only saw on tv but as i sip a gallon of white wine at the TGI Fridays in the Dallas airport because my flight is four hours delayed, i am not sure this is what i meant
— Scaachi (@Scaachi) June 27, 2018
when i was young i used to think a "muscle car" was a fast red car a muscleman would lift up in the air. i now no longer think about things
— tara shoe (@tarashoe) May 22, 2016
When I was a kid I thought being invisible was a dream, but as woman nearing 40 I can excitedly confirm It's a reality!
— A Mancino-Williams (@Manda_like_wine) October 28, 2017
When I was a kid, leaving summer camp was so hard for me. I didn't want to let go of the beloved routine I'd formed over those two months away. Moving houses is the adult equivalent of that.
— Amy Kaufman (@AmyKinLA) June 16, 2018
Adulthood is middle school with money.
— Elizabeth Hackett (@LizHackett) May 7, 2018
when i was a kid i'd CLIMB TREES. NOW look at me, on my PHONE walking INTO little kids I'M NOT DONE and knocking them over into trees
— tara shoe (@tarashoe) January 4, 2017
When I was a kid, I thought Kenny Rogers and Dolly Parton were corny. I was right. But I also thought that being corny was bad. I was wrong.
— Shawn (@BackpackingDad) December 25, 2017
Kids. When I was their age, I was just as lazy but over time I've subconsciously constructed a false heroic narrative about myself
— Brian Gaar (@briangaar) September 21, 2013
When I was a kid I wasn't allowed to watch The X Files but now I'm about to from the very beginning and I HOPE YOU CAN SEE THIS MOM AND DAD.
— Anne T. Donahue (@annetdonahue) July 6, 2015
- This article originally appeared on HuffPost.